To think I am idealising this idea? (Remote living)

[AtlasPine]

What is it really like living remotely? I dream of a house on a hillside miles from town but that’s possibly because of being in one of the busier parts of London now. Have you or do you live remotely? What are the unexpected pitfalls? Would you recommend it in practice?

To add to my previous post, you'd 100% need a car and you'd need to be confident driving on windy rural lanes in the pitch black!

It does depend massively on personality, age and life stage.

For a person in their 50s, say, with no kids but an established (remote) career and a good network of local friends and time to plan their life, it could be amazing.

I wouldn't even consider doing it if you have dependent children, or if you are anxious or very extrovert.

I lived rural (not even very rurally) as a child/early teenager. Now I live in a city with my own early teenagers and they have far far better quality of life than I did. Yes I had lively fresh air and scenery but that means nothing to a teenager my kids can walk to the city, cinema, football pitches, leisure centre, school etc and that is far more important to me.

I don't particularly live remotely but live on the edge of a village in Cumbria , which largely is remote anyway.
Think of your age ? How long is it until you have to think of needing doctors / hospital appointments more frequently, our main hospital is a 60 mile round trip.
What happens if you car is off the road , or you are unable to drive for a time. Lack of busses / not on bus route. Taxi journeys much more expensive .
Shopping - How much of a foodie are you ? For us , a reasonable choice , decent food shops , again a 60 mile round trip.
Internet access / speed , is that important for you ?
Yes agree with above poster , not much around for arts and culture .depends on how important that is you you ?

Just from reading this, some people love it and some hate it. I think the trick would be to try it without totally burning your bridges, just in case you turn out to be one of the ones who hates it

I would love it, I know exactly where I would live and visit there often.
But I'm tied to the city because I need to be near a major hospital. I have bi-weekly appointments that are supposed to take 2 hours but on average take 4 sometimes 8.
Where I would like to live is 1hr 30mins from a major hospital, in good traffic.
People I know who had my kind of treatment living there spend a fortune on transport/accomodation.
It would hopefully not be a factor for you but if it is, it's a big one.

and you'd need to be confident driving on windy rural lanes in the pitch black!

It’s a lot easier if you turn the headlamps on.

I love isolation. I'd go even more remote if I could.

I live on a small offshore island off the west coast of Ireland. Waited a long time for this and already had ten years on an outer Orkney island twenty years ago.

For me it i all I seek. I am nearly eighty and was on disability before I retired so I am well used to a very simply lifestyle.

I have only been off island once in the last two years ; been here six years, And that was by Rescue Air Ambulance in a medical emergency . From my call it was less than half an hour to the hospital . . By ferry then road would have been at least two hours.

Medical care accessible by visiting GP .

Good supply lines. And an excellent postal service. They do a special shoppers ferry every week so I email a list every two weeks and it is delivered to my door. Coastal areas here are very practical and extent that to the isles. Good competitive, prices from a main supermarket that like most rural places sells everything, I even now get a whole cooked chicken with every order..

Good power supply . apparently is used to be unreliable but they laid cables under the ocean and excellent now. One short power cut in my six years here. Good water supply etc and am well used to septic tanks after two decades of rural life out here in the wild west of Ireland. I cook by bottled gas by preference and always a spare bottle on hand. One lasts at least three months.

Heating by excellent solid fuel stove that heats the water and runs radiators. I buy turf from my neighbour so the money stays on island and occasionally smokeless coal eggs . That come over on the ferry

Excellent small local broadband firm. Skilled at coastal regions. The dish is on the north ocean facing wall and never a flicker in the worst of gales. Costs much less than digiweb and coverage is full time with no limitations on it

Winter; well we get gales in off the Atlantic from next month onwards, but between Orkney and Ireland I am well used to them. .. Rarely snow. Rarely frost.

And of course copious supplies are squirrelled away . That is just common sense. I have at any time enough dry goods to last three months and a normal size freezer is fine. Just finishing restocking now.

We are few out here and the silence and peace are deep and total. I lie abed in the dark bliss of night and soak in the sheer utter peace. We are on the edge of a Dark Sky area so just lighthouses and harbour lights.

And of course I know who to call in need. Actually far more available than in a town. We are neighbours. Not strangers.

Life is very seasonal but I love that mightily. And prefer winter to summer. hated winter in towns. Out here it is wondrously bleak. Walking against the wind. I used to be terrified in the bad gales but better now. Orkeny was worse; gusts of a hundred and twrenty four miles per hour r for three days once.

And I love to be out in the very early hours. Total peace and the sheer beauty of the silent or roaring ocean. I give thanks every day now.

And for me what others see as cons? I was never one to eat out or get takeways. Or cinemas etc. I miss a library ,, But with the internet? Someone sent me when I asked a copy of Lord of the Rings and I am ekeing it out; just not the same reading online, lol...
Nio TV by choice but I gather there is good reception.

So happy here I am. I was on the lane at first light, picking blackberries and wild flowers. Then home to a good breakfast

But then I have had all the other remote places and it is my natural element.. and on my own is easy too.

@SoloISland

I live on a small offshore island off the west coast of Ireland. Waited a long time for this and already had ten years on an outer Orkney island twenty years ago.

For me it i all I seek. I am nearly eighty and was on disability before I retired so I am well used to a very simply lifestyle.

I have only been off island once in the last two years ; been here six years, And that was by Rescue Air Ambulance in a medical emergency . From my call it was less than half an hour to the hospital . . By ferry then road would have been at least two hours.

Medical care accessible by visiting GP .

Good supply lines. And an excellent postal service. They do a special shoppers ferry every week so I email a list every two weeks and it is delivered to my door. Coastal areas here are very practical and extent that to the isles. Good competitive, prices from a main supermarket that like most rural places sells everything, I even now get a whole cooked chicken with every order..

Good power supply . apparently is used to be unreliable but they laid cables under the ocean and excellent now. One short power cut in my six years here. Good water supply etc and am well used to septic tanks after two decades of rural life out here in the wild west of Ireland. I cook by bottled gas by preference and always a spare bottle on hand. One lasts at least three months.

Heating by excellent solid fuel stove that heats the water and runs radiators. I buy turf from my neighbour so the money stays on island and occasionally smokeless coal eggs . That come over on the ferry

Excellent small local broadband firm. Skilled at coastal regions. The dish is on the north ocean facing wall and never a flicker in the worst of gales. Costs much less than digiweb and coverage is full time with no limitations on it

Winter; well we get gales in off the Atlantic from next month onwards, but between Orkney and Ireland I am well used to them. .. Rarely snow. Rarely frost.

And of course copious supplies are squirrelled away . That is just common sense. I have at any time enough dry goods to last three months and a normal size freezer is fine. Just finishing restocking now.

We are few out here and the silence and peace are deep and total. I lie abed in the dark bliss of night and soak in the sheer utter peace. We are on the edge of a Dark Sky area so just lighthouses and harbour lights.

And of course I know who to call in need. Actually far more available than in a town. We are neighbours. Not strangers.

Life is very seasonal but I love that mightily. And prefer winter to summer. hated winter in towns. Out here it is wondrously bleak. Walking against the wind. I used to be terrified in the bad gales but better now. Orkeny was worse; gusts of a hundred and twrenty four miles per hour r for three days once.

And I love to be out in the very early hours. Total peace and the sheer beauty of the silent or roaring ocean. I give thanks every day now.

And for me what others see as cons? I was never one to eat out or get takeways. Or cinemas etc. I miss a library ,, But with the internet? Someone sent me when I asked a copy of Lord of the Rings and I am ekeing it out; just not the same reading online, lol...
Nio TV by choice but I gather there is good reception.

So happy here I am. I was on the lane at first light, picking blackberries and wild flowers. Then home to a good breakfast

But then I have had all the other remote places and it is my natural element.. and on my own is easy too.

The way you describe it sounds marvellous.

PS I decided not to try to replace my last car. Being my age I would need a retest every year. No thanks... I do not miss the world over the ocean. Loved it when it was available maybe once every two weeks but happy not going anywhere. I

In my early years here I was chatting at my gate with the ferryman who is my neighbour and a lady who was visiting. She asked if I lived here or was visiting and he chipped on.. when I said I am here permanently. Oh we soon realised that one this was not soft but a bit tough like....
That was the greatest compliment I have ever had

If you are serious. then yu need to take stock. We had folk in Orkney who had visited in summer, then bought a house. Then winter hit and one day they vanished back to the mainland..
No shame in that either.

@FlumpsAreShit

I live rurally but not remote. Nearest pub/shop is 1.5 miles in either direction. Surrounded by farms. Can't hear or see any neighbours. However our village (5 min drive) is bustling with cafes, independent shops, a lovely pub etc and we are 25ish mins drive from Belfast. I'm from home counties and have lived in London and Belfast before.

I love:

Not ever worrying what neighbours think/about making noise
Absolutely massive house and 5 acre garden. Kids run wild and free
Enjoy general lifestyle of chopping our own wood, foraging berries and making jams etc for winter, having space in outbuildings to store
Amazing birdlife (we have our own woodland)
Scope to grow own fruits and veggies etc.
Generally feel calmer and more content
Amazing cycling/walking on doorstep
Local amenities and beauty spots are never over crowded and can always park

Dislike:
Have to drive everywhere
Some things more expensive - e.g. we are on oil for heating
We get supermarket deliveries but if something important is missing and not in village shop we have to drive 15 mins to nearest lidl or 20 to nearest big 4 supermarket
Generally just more of an event to go anywhere rather than 'popping' to Dunelm etc. Then again, felt the same in central London as public transport made getting places a bit more lengthy. Belfast was easy though
Bit harder to make friends. People here have known each other since they were kids/are family friends/related etc
Less going on in local area. Have to drive 20 mins to take an evening class or something
Only have a choice of about 3 takeaways that will deliver and 2 are miles away so much would probably be cold. Never thought I'd miss this but I do
No taxi service here! So I can't really drink out of the house!

This is my ideal. 3-5 acres, rural but not remote. That’s my two main criteria to tell an estate agent when we’re ready, a few years away yet, but I can’t wait. I grow vegetables already and love being able to walk into the garden to pick stuff and cook it, I’d love to expand this and be self sufficient for veg.

Where I live...

Drawbacks
No Takeaways or deliveries (except Royal Mail)
No pub,
No public transport
Cycle or drive most places
Very little employment
DS travels 20 miles to school
Few friends for DS close by
Regular power cuts

Benefits - peace, clean air, safe cycling or running, wildlife
Very little crime
No congestion
Easy to get a GP or Dentist appt
Distant neighbours, so no arguments

I love it but I'm pretty self reliant.

I grew up rurally. Through primary school it was great - we’d just disappear into the fields for the whole day.
As a teenager it was awful. Couldn’t go anywhere unless parents drove me (& they both worked full-time) - no popping round to friends’ houses etc, and the nearest town was 20 miles away. No takeaways or deliveries, no mains gas or sewage (oil & a septic tank), internet speed was painstakingly slow and mobile signal patchy.
Drink & drugs were rife amongst teenagers as there wasn’t much else to do, and there was a lot of space to just disappear into.

I wanted to go to college for my A-Levels and my choice was either get a lift with my parents and be there at 8am, or walk 3 miles to a bus, then get a train, then walk another mile.

I’m an adult now and I drive, and I would absolutely love to live rurally again. But I have kids and I just couldn’t do it to them. Maybe once they’re older and can drive themselves.

@hashbrownsandwich

I love isolation. I'd go even more remote if I could.

Oh yes please.... Have a look at some of the offshore Mayo islands. Inishkea.. … But there has to be that compromise with safety. The year before I left the Kerry mountains and came here I checked out so many offshore islands. There are literally hundreds here. And i WAS an island I was seeking. Many were far too... busy and full of facilities. May as well be on the mainland,,, But there has to be a supply line and emergency cover,

Many Irish islands depopulated because that was not so and folk were dying needlessly.

With the Rescue Coastguard choppers?

And for me it has to be an island.

We have just spent 10 days living remotely.

No tv, no phone signal, no Internet.
Ds who always fantasised about living in the countryside and how much more you could get for your money is now looking at studio apartments in Zone 1.

Dd said it was a revelation.
She knows lots of people from all over the country and when friends have said they or a parent can’t find a job or haven’t any money she could never understand why as being near a city with millions of people she can turn her hand to all sorts of things to make money. (Hospitality, free lance work or just buying and selling stuff) But out in the remote countryside with its pretty English villages she couldn’t see how you would work without spending half your life in a car commuting or just getting to civilisation

As per PP I think it depends on what you consider important. I have mains electricity, although some people not too far away didn't get that until the 1990s. I have oiled fired heating because I'm not near mains gas and I have a septic tank. These things are fine. I cook with electric.

No uber eats. I'm not that isolated so there are taxis, but they're very expensive. You can get by without a car since I'm in a village, but it is more difficult than in a city. I wouldn't have enjoyed this life in my 20s, but now nearing 50 I think it's great. We have film clubs, but you're not going to get the latest releases as they come out. We have live music, much of it excellent, but you aren't going to have a plethora of choice every night of the week. Again, I actually rather like that. People are rather concerned with quite trivial matters. There is also a lack of diversity and there can be a lack of tolerance. That does bother me but all you can do is try to combat that.

I'm rural enough to not have cars pass my house and my nearest neighbour is far enough away that I can drink a coffee on the way there. I don't have kids, it's just me and my husband and cats here so we aren't depriving children of interacting with others.

My husband commutes but mainly works from home and I don't work so have a lot of freedom with how i spend my time. It works for us because we prefer each other's company more than anyone else's and we both drive and can afford to drive everywhere. If you can't drive I imagine it wouldn't be as good. We drive to meet grocery and takeout delivery drivers but only 5 minutes down the lane to the nearest proper road.

Winter is difficult and our lanes aren't gritted so we or our neighbours have to do it. If you don't get on with your neighbours you may have to factor in getting a vehicle or snow tires to cope with snow or gritting- you won't be able to just sprinkle it by hand while walking.

If it's relevant, I'm early 20s he's late 30s, you don't have to be retired to have this life. But keep in mind you won't be able to nip for a coffee with a friend or pop to the shops as you did in a town. Prepare for bulk buying food and having a stocked pantry and freezers in winter and most of the year.

I'd recommend it to anyone who is actually interested in it. Usually Londoners arrive and mess up the community so aren't often welcome. You'll still be more welcome than any Americans in the English countryside though!

I grew up rurally and later lived with my children in the next community.
Moved when they were 11as I didn't want them to have the teenage years that I did.
no other children within walking distance
No shop after 5pm, no cinema, 1 bus a day
No taxis
no delivery takeaway
Expensive

I'd hate it so much !!
I have three supermarkets within a kilometre and three different bus routes within a kilometre as well. I couldn't cope with isolation at all.

with regard to these mayo islands, is there internet? is there a supermarket? how often would you need to go and buy food? Is there a boat? It sounds like a hard life to me.....

@Sagaz

with regard to these mayo islands, is there internet? is there a supermarket? how often would you need to go and buy food? Is there a boat? It sounds like a hard life to me.....

I think I covered most of this.

Perfect internet

Supermarket just over the ocean and they deliver to l I time it for every two weeks. One of Ireland;s main supermarket chains in competition with the others so keen prices.

There are daily ferries. Abd they will add more if need be An there are buses to other places once you are over

Not hard as i am well organised. . Less hassle than I think many here have. .I don't seek any social facilities and ask as little of others as is possible. A different slant on remote maybe?

Oh I write a weblog. and I do have a very real role out here; caring for all the cats on the island who needed homes etc. I love it here and see no hardship.

There are different meanings to remote. Mine is coloured with isolation and a separation from urban life.
islandanchorhold.blogspot.com

As you get older, or indeed if you have any infirmity it's good to be near facilities. You need to be able to drive, otherwise getting to the doc or chemist or almost anywhere is either very time-consuming or expensive. I lived for a while in Norfolk, visiting recently on holiday the nearby small town bank has closed, and very few taxis. villages are lovely but no public transport. I'd have no family to help, different if all your family are able to help. Recently had an accident and couldn't drive for some time, you just need to have epilepsy or eyesight problems, etc and you're stuck. I stayed with family after getting out of the hospital, in a village just a few miles away. to get to the doc in my home town was fifteen pounds each way, no public transport, only a small shop, no post office or anything, no public transport either to the nearby village with a PO. pretty handy for a lot of towns nearby IF you can drive and have a car
An aunt lives on the fringes of the moors and visiting her over the moors one august bank holiday, the drive back over the tops was wet, windy, like the middle of winter, I decided that day that lovely as it would have been I'd not want to live anywhere like that, if it could be like that in the summer

Lots of things to think about before going anywhere remote

@SoloISland

I live on a small offshore island off the west coast of Ireland. Waited a long time for this and already had ten years on an outer Orkney island twenty years ago.

For me it i all I seek. I am nearly eighty and was on disability before I retired so I am well used to a very simply lifestyle.

I have only been off island once in the last two years ; been here six years, And that was by Rescue Air Ambulance in a medical emergency . From my call it was less than half an hour to the hospital . . By ferry then road would have been at least two hours.

Medical care accessible by visiting GP .

Good supply lines. And an excellent postal service. They do a special shoppers ferry every week so I email a list every two weeks and it is delivered to my door. Coastal areas here are very practical and extent that to the isles. Good competitive, prices from a main supermarket that like most rural places sells everything, I even now get a whole cooked chicken with every order..

Good power supply . apparently is used to be unreliable but they laid cables under the ocean and excellent now. One short power cut in my six years here. Good water supply etc and am well used to septic tanks after two decades of rural life out here in the wild west of Ireland. I cook by bottled gas by preference and always a spare bottle on hand. One lasts at least three months.

Heating by excellent solid fuel stove that heats the water and runs radiators. I buy turf from my neighbour so the money stays on island and occasionally smokeless coal eggs . That come over on the ferry

Excellent small local broadband firm. Skilled at coastal regions. The dish is on the north ocean facing wall and never a flicker in the worst of gales. Costs much less than digiweb and coverage is full time with no limitations on it

Winter; well we get gales in off the Atlantic from next month onwards, but between Orkney and Ireland I am well used to them. .. Rarely snow. Rarely frost.

And of course copious supplies are squirrelled away . That is just common sense. I have at any time enough dry goods to last three months and a normal size freezer is fine. Just finishing restocking now.

We are few out here and the silence and peace are deep and total. I lie abed in the dark bliss of night and soak in the sheer utter peace. We are on the edge of a Dark Sky area so just lighthouses and harbour lights.

And of course I know who to call in need. Actually far more available than in a town. We are neighbours. Not strangers.

Life is very seasonal but I love that mightily. And prefer winter to summer. hated winter in towns. Out here it is wondrously bleak. Walking against the wind. I used to be terrified in the bad gales but better now. Orkeny was worse; gusts of a hundred and twrenty four miles per hour r for three days once.

And I love to be out in the very early hours. Total peace and the sheer beauty of the silent or roaring ocean. I give thanks every day now.

And for me what others see as cons? I was never one to eat out or get takeways. Or cinemas etc. I miss a library ,, But with the internet? Someone sent me when I asked a copy of Lord of the Rings and I am ekeing it out; just not the same reading online, lol...
Nio TV by choice but I gather there is good reception.

So happy here I am. I was on the lane at first light, picking blackberries and wild flowers. Then home to a good breakfast

But then I have had all the other remote places and it is my natural element.. and on my own is easy too.

Wow, this sounds amazing! You write vey evocatively.

We regularly stay in a cottage on the Isle of Skye that is ten miles away from the nearest shop and pub. It’s idyllic with coastal and countryside views, there are other properties dotted around but it does feel remote. I love having a couple of weeks there in summer but I think I’d go out of my mind if I lived there.