@ZoeCM The simplest explanation is usually the correct one. If a woman is on her sixth abortion, she probably just doesn't consider abortion a big deal.
Many of them won't see it as a big deal -- but we can't apply that to all women who have 5+ abortions anymore than we can apply that no woman has an abortion lightly. I thought that was obvious from the context of the sentence before the one you quoted OP "Absolutes in what people feel or do are rarely helpful."
You talk against one absolute while using another. It's not all women or no women. It's some women, some girls.
Many people in this thread are calling for nuance and for things to be less judgemental, less black/white, understand multiple points of view. That's my part of it - and I've no idea of the people you know, but this law you talked about in the OP is in Texas. Things are a little different when you have communities that still preach that a woman saying I do meaning she accepts sex as her duty to her husband. I know NI posters and writers elsewhere have discussed similarities in rhetoric used within some devout communities and I think that cultural difference is important in discussing this sort of law and the many attempts across the US with similar heartbeat bills that have been going on for decades and how to counter it.
Regardless, it's her decision, and that's what we should encourage pro-lifers to respect.
I was raised in an American Evangelical community, the type this sort of law is aimed at pleasing. I know many personal pro-lifers who don't approve of this use of law, they aren't legal prolifers, and they do respect women's choices even if they view it as regretable and work to reduce it and would never have one themselves. I do know some who were more legal prolifers who have been swayed by the body autonomy argument - that we can't force people to give blood, how can we force them to risk far more through pregnancy and childbirth and how we dismiss the risks and sacrifices those who choose to risk a full term pregnancy if we force it on others. I think it's a good argument and a much better one that treating like a sin one must flagellate over. I don't think the latter is as big a win to prolifers as you seem to think. It's not a good argument, but it's not that damaging either.
Women discussing whether abortion is or isn't taken lightly isn't handing the pro-lifers anything, those who support this type of law full heartedly already think women who get abortions are having them like candy as heartless jezebels. That image is already out there, people trying to counter that doesn't really move the needle much whether the prolifers has evidence against them or not. Most who vote for this type of politician aren't that type - they vote on other issues and this isn't a big enough deal to turn them away or they're in the 'We're X denomination and we vote R" and it's part of their community identity. It'll take something bigger than encouragement to shift those voters, even more to get the ones who actively support this type of law.
This law is aimed at pleasing those who politicians are hoping will promote them in the pulpit and vote them back in. It's aimed at the ones that have spent decades viewing this issue as a holy crusade, that having the law on the books that recognizes the evils of abortion and if they overturn Roe vs Wade or find a work around like this one where because it's civil law that creates a massive barrier, not a criminal one, they can 'save the nation' and are more likely to talk about politics through that fervor. This is the type of Evangelical who thinks our bodies belong to God, not to us, and that death is a suitable punishment for sin and that God uses maternal deaths to teach us lessons -- and I'm being literal there, I've had this type discuss my friend's death from childbirth-related complications was God's plan to warn the rest of us against sin of pre-marital sex. How would you encourage that type to respect anyone who can get pregnant?
You might get a Joshua Harris moment and get one of these big voices to change their tune (though the entitlement tends to remain), but I haven't seen that actually lead to a big shift in culture. We'll need a lot more than encouragement, we need the powers within the churches and where churches are getting their powers from to have a major cultural shift, just as it took a large cultural shift to get Evangelicals to move from apolitical to largely Republican and politically pro-life. There is no simple answer to this issue, I'd love there to be, so would many exevangelicals who grew up in these communities - there is discussions on which methods worked for them and which didn't -- here is series on it on tiktok discussing why most arguments don't work which covers things well but judging how people talk about abortion is more us tearing each other apart to do things 'right' than anything to do with encouraging that type of person who thinks this law is a great idea to change their mind.
We're not talking individual prolifers feelings when it comes to laws like this, we're talking multiple systems of power working together and those who take advantage of how those systems work for their own gains. We might like it simple, but these things are complicated and I think oversimplifying it erases that this issue goes down to the roots of corruption within some denominations and communities and in our government systems.
Some women who have 5+ abortions don't care. Some are in a shitty situation. Some are both. My mother actually had 5 pregnancies at least, 2 she lost late largely because of drug use though she used drugs in all of them. She was married as a teenager because of a pregnancy and that's how they solved that "problem" rather than recognizing someone who uses contraception money for drugs maybe should be supported in a abortion that she wanted instead. She could have been more careful and likely wouldn't have cared to go through multiple abortions if it had been possible and supported, she certainly didn't in telling me how much she wished she could have aborted me. As pp said, not all women with an unwanted pregnancies end up like my mother, but in a community where she was expected to love us and do everything by virtue of giving birth, I think that more women - and more children - end up in that situation. I'll never understand why that's better or why anyone would want someone to take the risks of pregnancy if they don't choose it, but I do understand that the power structures within the communities are hurting women and children with that ideal and I've no idea how they can be encouraged to respect either.