To be sick of mens road rage and men being unable to contain their anger

[Poetrypatty]

A man was tailgating me and gesticulating this morning because he wanted to force me to overtake a child who was cycling - on a busy road with bollards where there wasn't room. I'm so sick of men not being able to manage their anger, and thinking they are entitled to be so aggressive and rude.

@TheSockMonster

I always think it’s terribly ironic how women are labelled as being over emotional whereas in day to day life it’s far more likely to be men whose behaviour is ruled by their emotions. The difference is we tend to give men the courtesy of naming their actual emotions (I.e. anger, frustration, etc)

I work in a testosterone fuelled environment where such outbursts from men tend to get excused as anger. Eg. Bob got very angry in the Friday meeting about the delays with phase 2. I have started relabelling the behaviour as ‘emotional’. Eg. Bob got very emotional in the Friday meeting…

No one has commented on it, but it’s keeping me amused.

I totally agree with this. The patriarchy has successfully branded women as 'emotional' and 'hysterical,' while it's actually men who can't control their emotions and shout, abuse, threaten, harass, kill etc. It's men who are 'emotional.'

@sillysmiles we were overtaking hence why we were in that lane, we then weren't able to pull in, it's possible that cars in the other lane should have pulled in which would have enabled us to pull in, but I was more focussed on the lunatic behind us

I was caught between two angry men once. I was second in the queue for the lights, when the light went green the car in front of me stalled and the guy in the car behind me immediately started blaring his horn. The man ahead thought it was me doing the beeping, wound his window down and leaned out to shout and swear at me while the guy behind got more and more frantic with the beeping.

@Poetrypatty

I see your point, you are of course right there....

As a man, I am ashamed to say that yes, most violence is committed by men, and those that do, just go for whoever happens to be in their way at the time...

As for saying that suggesting that men don't need to worry about violence from road rage, I'm sorry, but I am shit scared of taking a major beating, or a knifing just as much as anybody else...

Really true. A case of the victims aren't always women, but the perpetrators are nearly always men - especially when things turn violent. Almost as those the problem is #maleviolence!

@Keke94LND

It's easy it can happen.

No need at all for you to be ashamed FaceForRadio1973 Like you I wish it were different though. Maybe they do the same level of road rage to men I don't know, or maybe like you say they direct it at the car.

Interesting that people think it's worse since the pandemic. It makes me worried whether this rage will spill out onto the streets.

I'm a man, and I'm fully capable of controlling my anger. Any men that "can't" are choosing not to.

I also get twats sitting up my arse and gesticulating at me. I tend to slow down even more. The less stopping distance there is between us, the more time I'm going to need to decelerate gradually if theres a hazard ahead. They tend to get the message by the time I'm pootling along at 10 miles an hour.

Interesting that people think it's worse since the pandemic. It makes me worried whether this rage will spill out onto the streets.

I wonder if the people who stayed going out to work during the pandemic got used to having emptier roads and find the extra traffic more frustrating. And the people who were working from home during the pandemic weren't driving as much for 18 months are finding other drivers harder to deal with now?

I've just put a front & rear dashcam on my van, a stipulation of the insurance. It was £30. Well worth it.
So many knobbers on the road.

I get the same treatment it doesn’t matter what I do or how I drive men always try to intimidate me, or beep at me, or call me a cunt. I’m shocked more and more every day at the other drivers male or female because I genuinely wonder if they are capable of driving safely, I’ll give an example
Not looking to the right at the roundabout and nearly causing a massive pile up, not looking at all and just pulling out of a side road, and these people look genuinely confused when you beep at them. I just don’t get it, one day I’m going to get hurt because of someone else's stupidity. I’ve also seen old ladies going 70mph towards a red traffic light, jumped it and smashed straight into oncoming dual carriageway and crushed her car, killing the person in the other car, she probably died as well I don’t actually remember. I’ve seen so many weird things happen and the worst of it is when I am doing the speed limit there’s always someone who comes so close to me and tries to overtake me and blind me with their lights into my side mirror, so aggressive beeping and revving when they finally do overtake me.

A few more Police around wouldn't hurt.....

Agree that driving has become more aggressive and short tempered since lockdown ended. I get irrationally cross with male (almost always) drivers who drive the cars that sound as if they have a broken exhaust plus an explosion from the engine as they increase their speed. They are usually playing beat music with the window down and have their arm outside. If I had a paint gun I would use it.

I definitely notice that other drivers are much more courteous when I drive DH’s car. Which is bigger and more powerful than mine. So I’d say they may be reacting to your car rather than your sex.

This is definitely true, DH is a big burly builder and gets none of this bollocks when he's in his van. The other day he was driving my Focus with toddler DS in the back and got cut up three times, he was shocked at how differently people treat you in a "woman's car".

There's plenty of footage of two male drivers and road rage fighting or shouting at each other.
Many years ago, a man beeped at my mum at a roundabout and gestured angrily for her to move when we were on our way home from the supermarket.
She couldn't as she was waiting for a cyclist to pass, which the driver behind her obviously hadn't noticed.
My mum, all five feet nothing of her, flew out of her car and charged towards him with a crook lock in her hand and plenty of mouth.
The bloke looked terrified and didn't say another word.
I slunk down the seat and tried to hide.
Never piss off an angry middle aged woman whose magnums are in danger of melting.

Road rage from whoever it is driving, is very puzzling, the same when you see the YouTube clips of customers rageing at various staff member's, it's like yes I understand it may be frustrating, but it does not solve anything by rageing.

@Pinkywoo

I definitely notice that other drivers are much more courteous when I drive DH’s car. Which is bigger and more powerful than mine. So I’d say they may be reacting to your car rather than your sex.

This is definitely true, DH is a big burly builder and gets none of this bollocks when he's in his van. The other day he was driving my Focus with toddler DS in the back and got cut up three times, he was shocked at how differently people treat you in a "woman's car".

Definitely this. DH is a big bloke - used to drive a Fiesta but has now got a big Audi thing. His driving hasn’t changed but he doesn’t get anything like the number of drivers (male or female) tailgating him or cutting him up. There’s definitely a type of driver who views a small car as an easy target.

I was parked in my car this afternoon, just glanced at a car driving past. He gave me the middle finger! My 8 year old was in the front with me, she asked why he would do that?! I replied, "no idea!"

I was following one along a 40mph road and he was pissing about, driving at 20mph one minute then speeding up the next, sitting at green traffic lights and messing with his radio. Right, I thought, threw my car into third and buzzed past him. Well, he went absolutely bananas 😆 he tailgated me, sounded his horn and tried to intimidate me, gesticulating, the lot. He tried to undertake me on a small roundabout, but I was going down the little used right exit, so he didn't win there either.

Twas a good feeling. He was driving a shitty little Yugo type contraption as well.

YANBU. I drive a very stereotypical 'old lady' car (obviously anyone can drive a car, but I'd say 70% of the demographic I see driving the same car as me are over-60s women). I get a LOT of road ragey men being angry at me not going 45 in a 30 to suit them.

When I drive my husband's big Volvo estate, I get a lot less tailgating. I really do think it's because they assume it's a man driving.

In the interests of balance, the worst road rage I've experienced was a woman, who was clearly a massive dickhead, but it does seem to be more men.

Beautiful3 that is shocking! And poor you having to try to explain that to your dd. Just unbelievable why people act like that.

@MoreAloneTime

If you were a man I bet he'd have managed to control himself

This entirely usual comment is comedy gold.

They are generally much more aggressive with male drivers. Especially if they have smaller cars.

On a linked but separate note I have found that it is males that drive 'executive' cars that are the worst for this.

And those that pay the least attention are those that drive large 4x4s in town.

As for MAMIL, I suspect that these are the same men that are aggressive in cars.

@labrador73

Agree that driving has become more aggressive and short tempered since lockdown ended. I get irrationally cross with male (almost always) drivers who drive the cars that sound as if they have a broken exhaust plus an explosion from the engine as they increase their speed. They are usually playing beat music with the window down and have their arm outside. If I had a paint gun I would use it.

You are aware that they are doing nothing wrong?

I had a male driver in a massive Audi try to force me into the bus lane so that he could come into my side of the road to overtake an obstacle on his.
I wouldn't do it but he was gesticulating and furious he made me doubt whether I was right to refuse.
Didn't fancy a £60 fine just to benefit some stranger though.

Yes it’s always men behaving like this

I was recently in a queue of traffic at a junction controlled by traffic lights. The light turned amber and a few cars drove through, I drive up to the lights and stopped at the line as the lights turned red. The driver behind me was furious and I could see her gesticulating in my rear view mirror. She then tailgated me through 30mph roads before coming to a second set of lights with 2 lanes, the left for turning left and going straight l on, and the right for turning right only. I was in the left lane going straight she was in the right lane. As soon as the light turned green she put her foot down, cut me up as she moved into my lane and just for good measure braked hard before accelerating off.

So it's not always men and there are plenty of aggressive cunts on the road of all sexes.