Discovered (by accident) BIL is bankrupt. Do I tell SIL?

[PoppyWoods]

Part of my job is to check the insolvency register. It's a public register, freely accessible to all.

I put in various names, mine, my parents, my sisters and brothers, not expecting to find anything. Anyway to my horror I discovered my BIL was declared bankrupt 3 months ago. It's definitely him as it lists full name, address and dob.

My SIL has never mentioned it. We're fairly close and she's disclosed very personal things to me in the past, so I'm wondering if she even knows. Is it even possible that he could go through the process and her be totally unaware?

My dilemma is, do I tell her or not? What if she doesn't know? What if she does know and she's so mortified she hasn't told anyone? What if she accuses me of snooping and interfering?

I honestly don't know what I do with this information (if anything). Appreciate your thoughts

You didnt find out by accident. Of course don’t tell her.

@HyggeTygge

The glee is just pouring out of all your posts, OP

No it isn't.
What a bizarre thing to write.

I love this thread, it's the very worst of Mumsnet all in one place!

We've had inability to comprehend, wilful refusal to comprehend, ridiculous misinformation conveyed as settled fact, pearl-clutching judgmentalism, scapegoating projection, legal mumbojumbo from the ignorant, and now complete delusion

@BritWifeInUSA, I've literally cut and pasted what you posted, in which you in turn specifically quoted the reference to the Data Protection Act before claiming that it's irrelevant. This is no more snooping that looking up people you know on Google or Facebook.

muriel
"No it isn't. What a bizarre thing to write" could pretty much be posted appropriately on any AIBU thread after ~150 posts!

Well if one thing has come out of this thread, it’s that it’s finally dispelled the myth that mumsnet is full of well educated and intelligent women. 😂😂😂

I think I would have a private conversation with her.

Own up, and explain what you were doing and why and that you accidentally found out something which is non of your business.

See how she reacts. If she lets you know she's aware of the bankruptcy, apologise, let her know you will not disclose this to anyone else, and offer to support her in any way you can.

If she doesn't know, break the news to her gently and say you wanted to offer her support and again, you will not share the information with anyone else.

She's unlikely to respond well either way, but at least you will have done the best you could in a sensitive way.

@HeartsAndClubs

Well if one thing has come out of this thread, it’s that it’s finally dispelled the myth that mumsnet is full of well educated and intelligent women. 😂😂😂

It wasn't always this stupid, it used to have the reputation for a more well educated user base, but now it's devolved.

17 PAGES
AND STILL PEOPLE CANT UNDERSTAND THAT ALL INFO ABOUT BANKRUPTCIES IS AVAILABLE TO ANYONE WHO WANTS TO LOOK.

IT IS PUBLIC.
IT IS NOT ILLEGAL

@HeartsAndClubs
Haha so true. 90 % of people on this thread clearly aren’t in the top 5% bracket of earners.

@HyggeTygge

The glee is just pouring out of all your posts, OP

No it isn't.
What a bizarre thing to write.

"No it isn't"

What a riveting response. Not.

You were snooping and I hope that your employer keeps a record of your searches. Isn't it hugely inappropriate for you to be searching family members, presumably on work time? If it was out of work time you were still massively over stepping your boundaries.

This thread had taught me that one of the cardinal British values appears to be to ‘mind your own business’ which is followed closely by ‘turn a blind eye.’ Well done.

Tell your SIL, in whichever way seems best to you.
If she doesn't know already she needs to know now so that she can protect herself or get advice.
How you found out is less important than the fact that you have.

It may be a free and public register but my company wouldn't be happy us searching for non related work people
And no don't say anything as its non of your business

@caughtinanet yes in mine there is we are not allowed to use the internet for personal things and this would be considered personal as not needed for work
Its gross misconduct at my place and sackable offence

yes in mine there is we are not allowed to use the internet for personal things and this would be considered personal as not needed for work. Its gross misconduct at my place and sackable offence.

Had the OP come back to say that she looked them us at work?

Also even if you are allowed by your company to use the internet personally, if I was your sil I would be pissed off that you looked us up in the first place , as just why other than to be nosey . That would be the dealbreaker for me .

*up

@DominicRaabsTravelAgent she said as parr of her job

@DominicRaabsTravelAgent plus my reoly was to a pp who said no one would have it in contract that they could not Search uo something or something to that affect, just saying some places do .

@worriedatthemoment

It may be a free and public register but my company wouldn't be happy us searching for non related work people And no don't say anything as its non of your business

Why? You could, if you so wished, spend all your free time doing this, it's none of your employer's business.

[quote worriedatthemoment]@DominicRaabsTravelAgent she said as parr of her job [/quote]
No, she said she had to do this type of search as part of her job. She doesn't specifically say she did this in working hours, and she's made it pretty clear that her employers wouldn't care anyway.

No, she said she had to do this type of search as part of her job. She doesn't specifically say she did this in working hours, and she's made it pretty clear that her employers wouldn't care anyway

I thought so too, although I was beginning to think I'd missed a post from the OP.

When you go digging @PoppyWoods you have to be prepared to get your hands dirty. I would say let this be a lesson to you but frankly it doesn’t sound like you care much whether what you did was wrong or not.

Many, many contenders here for the Mumsnet "Two-Planks" award