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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DH charged me for Steak...but I'm a Veggie!

791 replies

atleastthepoochlovesme · 02/09/2021 20:04

Not irate/upset/annoyed but just wanted to see how others would feel if it were them...

DH is a lovely guy but has his quirks (don't we all). For context, we split the household bills and big purchases 50/50 so he transfers the money into my account on the 1st of each month. For anything else, we just buy what we want/need out of our own money.

A few weeks ago, DH and I had some beauty treatments by a self-employed beautician who has a beauty room at home but is also mobile. I've only visited her a handful of times before, so we're friendly, but not friends. Before we left, she was telling us about other treatments she does, so DH and I booked in for a massage at our home (DH said he would pay as a treat) which took place a couple of days ago. As we were leaving, DH asked her if she liked steak, to which she said yes, so DH told her that he would make a steak dinner for her (DH loves to cook). I thought it was a bit odd offering to make dinner for her when she was coming over to work, but it was a friendly enough gesture by him. Please note this was his gesture, not mine. I would've just given her a tip at the end!

Anyway, the day of the massage arrived; DH went to the butchers and bought the steak. While I was enjoying my massage, he was cooking away in the kitchen. Beautician ate and enjoyed the steak and DH was loving the compliments.

Yesterday morning, 1st of the month, direct debits due, I checked my bank account and found that DH had transferred £20 less than he should have. When I asked him why, he told me, "for the steak!" I wouldn't have minded but I'm a vegetarian so I don't even eat bloody steak!

Yes, he paid for my massage...thought it was a treat, but it cost me £20 in the end. Still a bargain I suppose! What would you think?

OP posts:
sue20 · 04/09/2021 08:50

Or the OP getting weird kick out of posting fake incident.

ineedsun · 04/09/2021 08:53

@linsey2581

I don’t understand couples especially married ones that keep their own money and split household bills?? My husband and I have a joint bank account to which both our wages go into and the bills come out of. I have a savings account that I’ve had for donkeys years but we use this for holiday funds and hubby normally says can you transfer savings as he doesn’t have access as it’s in my name and I just do it (I’ve had account since I was 18). I just don’t get this separate money thing and household bills can someone explain it ???? #baffled
It’s been explained a few times on here already but people drown it out if it doesn’t fit their experience.

We have a joint account for bills, DH has a very different approach to money than me, if he has money in an account he spends it, he also smokes 20 a day. I try and save what I can, mainly for big expenses or surprises so that if something breaks it’s not a major panic.

Ultimately it all comes back to the household in one way or another but it means that we don’t argue about money.

lottiegarbanzo · 04/09/2021 09:00

Is he often on the look out for a juicy omnivore to share a steak with?

BobISMyUncle · 04/09/2021 09:36

Wow. Just wow. You're happy to have another woman touching your husband? Touching you as well? Each to her own. But then, cooking her a steak? Woo. More going on here than face value.
Do you also swap keys? from a bowl?
I don't actually care. What you three get up to is entirely up to you three.

FfrothiCoffi · 04/09/2021 09:37

@BobISMyUncle

Wow. Just wow. You're happy to have another woman touching your husband? Touching you as well? Each to her own. But then, cooking her a steak? Woo. More going on here than face value. Do you also swap keys? from a bowl? I don't actually care. What you three get up to is entirely up to you three.
Another women touching her husband? She’s a masseuse, not a sex worker!
maddy68 · 04/09/2021 09:39

What an odd arrangement you have ? Yes if you are cooking for someone in your home that's a household bill. But why not just have a joint account and it stops the over analysis.

VanGoghsDog · 04/09/2021 09:40

@Shade17

How does steak for 2 people cost £40???

Very easily if you want it to. Check out Tom Hixson, get most of my steak there. A world apart from any supermarket shit.

It didn't. He "charged" his wife £20 for half the steak for the masseur. So a steak for ONE person cost £40.

It must be that, otherwise he charged his wife for the whole steak for the beautician, and surely that is even more wrong than everything else on this weird thread.

nannykatherine · 04/09/2021 11:12

He’s got a crush on the masseur

CynsterBitch · 04/09/2021 11:31

The whole things is bizarre

notbloodylikely · 04/09/2021 12:03

I think this is the first thread that’s made me repeatedly LOL (proper laughing, not just giggling) and naturally I’m in a public place.

JesusIsAnyNameFree · 04/09/2021 16:14

@VanGoghsDog

The whole meal was £40 according to the OP.

VanGoghsDog · 04/09/2021 16:53

[quote JesusIsAnyNameFree]@VanGoghsDog

The whole meal was £40 according to the OP.[/quote]
So, he charged her for the full cost of the steak he offered to the masseur. After offering to treat the OP to the massage.

What a wanker.

VenusTiger · 04/09/2021 17:43

@JayAlfredPrufrock

Your life sounds a universe away from mine.
Mine too. Full time SAHM. Joint account. Arguments about money drive me insane, that's why we don't have them. Change your money arrangments OP - you're acting like friends do.
LovelyIssues · 04/09/2021 20:03

I could not be in a relationship like that

jackielh · 04/09/2021 20:16

Something very telling in the OP's username. Sort of hints that this isn't a very loving household, more a convenience. Whole post and setup is just weird.

MrsFirth2006 · 04/09/2021 20:17

Am I the only one with a suspicious mind here???

LizzyA123 · 04/09/2021 20:23

Hmm, rather odd. Firstly I would be wondering why he is making so much effort to impress the therapist, it wasn’t a date. Secondly, that’s a very expensive steak if your 50% contribution to her steak was £20.

Sk8ermum3000 · 04/09/2021 22:08

OP is obviously a bloke having a laugh at the expense of all the outraged women on this MN thread. It’s clearly a wind up………
Definitely not a genuine situation. Let’s move on. Please.

TheChiefJo · 04/09/2021 22:48

@MrsFirth2006

Am I the only one with a suspicious mind here???
No. Not at all.
StormzyinaTCup · 04/09/2021 23:37

OMG how have I missed this one, I'm only five pages in and I haven't 😂😂 this much since I read the Sistine Chapel thread! I'm proper cry laughing here.

Excelthetube · 04/09/2021 23:38

OP is not a troll.

Strangeways19 · 05/09/2021 19:27

I too think its weird that the masseur ate a steak dinner in between massages?! and I think it was his idea to cook the dinner for her so he should pay for it

ChequerBoard · 05/09/2021 19:30

I'm struggling to think of any therapist I have ever met who would agree to sit and eat a steak dinner in the middle of a booked appointment session.

It's beyond weird.

GreyhoundG1rl · 05/09/2021 19:30

@Excelthetube

OP is not a troll.
And you know this because?
knittingaddict · 05/09/2021 19:59

@Excelthetube

OP is not a troll.
You can't possibly say that unless you know them personally.