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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH charged me for Steak...but I'm a Veggie!

791 replies

atleastthepoochlovesme · 02/09/2021 20:04

Not irate/upset/annoyed but just wanted to see how others would feel if it were them...

DH is a lovely guy but has his quirks (don't we all). For context, we split the household bills and big purchases 50/50 so he transfers the money into my account on the 1st of each month. For anything else, we just buy what we want/need out of our own money.

A few weeks ago, DH and I had some beauty treatments by a self-employed beautician who has a beauty room at home but is also mobile. I've only visited her a handful of times before, so we're friendly, but not friends. Before we left, she was telling us about other treatments she does, so DH and I booked in for a massage at our home (DH said he would pay as a treat) which took place a couple of days ago. As we were leaving, DH asked her if she liked steak, to which she said yes, so DH told her that he would make a steak dinner for her (DH loves to cook). I thought it was a bit odd offering to make dinner for her when she was coming over to work, but it was a friendly enough gesture by him. Please note this was his gesture, not mine. I would've just given her a tip at the end!

Anyway, the day of the massage arrived; DH went to the butchers and bought the steak. While I was enjoying my massage, he was cooking away in the kitchen. Beautician ate and enjoyed the steak and DH was loving the compliments.

Yesterday morning, 1st of the month, direct debits due, I checked my bank account and found that DH had transferred £20 less than he should have. When I asked him why, he told me, "for the steak!" I wouldn't have minded but I'm a vegetarian so I don't even eat bloody steak!

Yes, he paid for my massage...thought it was a treat, but it cost me £20 in the end. Still a bargain I suppose! What would you think?

OP posts:
Shirleyphallus · 03/09/2021 19:57

@CatBumJuice

I bloody love threads like this. Weirdness of cooking for the masseuse, along with offshoot discussions about the benefits of joint accounts, and the price of steak.
And with a sprinkling of being sassy to posters because they aren’t “buxom” Grin
Shirleyphallus · 03/09/2021 19:58

@SummerHouse

OP this is not so weird. We do this sort of thing all the time.

My Saturday to do list:

Tuck prawns in bra to warm through.
Welcome in beautician.
Get bikini wax.
Serve prawns to beautician whilst DH eats cheese on toast and watches.
Clear up whilst DH has toenails clipped.
Charge DH £68 for prawns.
Read DH thread on MN "but I'm a pescatarian!"

Not weird.

Properly lolled at this
Tessabelle74 · 03/09/2021 20:00

Why the fudge is he feeding the massage therapist, that's just weird!

LoisLane66 · 03/09/2021 20:03

You married a miser, tight-wad, pennypincher.
Good god, he's your husband and why did he charge £20 when a steak doesn't cost that much? You don't say whether you all ate dinner. I certainly wouldn't want to eat right after having a massage. I'd want to have a bath and chill.
Your DH sound weird. £20? ?
He's crackers. If it was my OH...well he'd think it most peculiar and frankly, laughable.
Can't stand misers.

cricketmum84 · 03/09/2021 20:07

I actually can’t get over how fucking bizarre this is.

LoisLane66 · 03/09/2021 20:08

Nor would I give a tip. I presume the therapist charges for the massage and travel all in, so why think of give extra for doing her job. Do you tip the train driver or Hermes courier or or or...
Madness. I pay the bill and that's it. Never more and I get excellent service.

Moelwynbach · 03/09/2021 20:35

Ibthinj the whole dividing 50 50 thing sound dull as ditch water to be honest

Michellelovesizzy · 03/09/2021 20:36

If my DH did this I wouldn't say any more next month I would transfer £10 less and when he asks I would say u invited her so u should really pay but coz ur my DH I will pay half then if he wants to go on about I would tell him to fuck off and laugh 😂

LouLou198 · 03/09/2021 20:40

Life is really too short to be faffing about with money like this every month! Also, find making her a steak very odd, surely a cup of tea would suffice?

vincettenoir · 03/09/2021 20:43

Say whaaaaaaaat?

Schooldilemma2345 · 03/09/2021 20:58

Is this for real or is it actually the plot of an unpublished Mike Leigh play?

marktayloruk · 03/09/2021 20:59

I admire his ruddy countenance.
I like his bloody cheek!

GeorgiaMcGraw · 03/09/2021 20:59

@SummerHouse

OP this is not so weird. We do this sort of thing all the time.

My Saturday to do list:

Tuck prawns in bra to warm through.
Welcome in beautician.
Get bikini wax.
Serve prawns to beautician whilst DH eats cheese on toast and watches.
Clear up whilst DH has toenails clipped.
Charge DH £68 for prawns.
Read DH thread on MN "but I'm a pescatarian!"

Not weird.

But do you serve a sauce with the prawns? Or do you just put a little marinade in your bra with them? Enquiring minds want to know.
Topazmumma · 03/09/2021 21:22

@ohidoliketobe

Sorry, I can't answer your question about the steak. I'm still really confused that he cooked a steak dinner for the therapist who had just given you a couples massage... And she just sat and ate it? In your home? Confused
This. I thought it was just me! Hmm
Sudoku88 · 03/09/2021 21:31

I’m shocked at how you split your money. It’s really calculating, almost like two mates sharing a place together. In my marriage what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine. We both work but there is absolutely no differentiation between whose money is whose. We are a united team.

Pinkfluff76 · 03/09/2021 21:33

How does steak for 2 people cost £40??? I recently bought a giant Tomahawk which fed us for days for £15. And that was Waitrose outdoor bred higher welfare standards so unless it was organic crusted with caviar…

HotSauceCommittee · 03/09/2021 21:39

If I come round and clip yours and your husband's toenails, will you do me a Quorn burger, OP?

JesusIsAnyNameFree · 03/09/2021 21:40

@Pinkfluff76

How does steak for 2 people cost £40??? I recently bought a giant Tomahawk which fed us for days for £15. And that was Waitrose outdoor bred higher welfare standards so unless it was organic crusted with caviar…
We've had this discussion. Ocado sell 300 gram steaks for £24. While some might not eat 300 gram of meat, I would buy one per person. I certainly wouldn't be stood there trying to cut them in equal halves, plus 150 grams for a guest seems stingy af.
Motherofalittledragon · 03/09/2021 21:55

Quite strange!

LampBookPicture · 03/09/2021 21:57

I'm imagining leopard print house coats, big hair dos and saucy winks along with that big steak.

exaltedwombat · 03/09/2021 22:01

I guess he wanted an excuse to cook steak, which HE likes?

Scottsy100 · 03/09/2021 22:01

Actual LOL at this one that programme was so bloody creepy but I couldn’t not watch 😂

CrankyFrankie · 03/09/2021 22:06

OP I love your attitude! This has given my pelvic floor a good workout.

How he gets his kicks aside, I do think it odd how he engineered the whole situation. Do you think maybe he had a hankering to watch a woman eat a steak as you’re a veggie? Did you enjoy a steak when you first got together? Have you been feeding him lots of quorn lately? The £20 deduction is the final kick in the teeth really, he is literally making you pay.

Eeiliethya · 03/09/2021 22:13

Bet the beautician will tell this story for the rest of her life 😂😂

thelastgoldeneagle · 03/09/2021 22:22

How is a steak £40? Was it made of gold?

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