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Original poster

Meeting for breakfast - Which of us is being unreasonable.

989 replies

Dandy008 · 02/09/2021 13:17

Im meeting a friend in a few weeks time who lives in a different part of the country to me.

We’ve arranged to have a day out.
It will be her and her husband, myself, my husband and our 18month old son.

As they live some distance, we have decided to book a hotel and stay over night.

My friend has asked me to book a hotel right by her house so that it’s less distance for her to travel to meet us the next day for breakfast.

I’ve agreed to this, even though we could get a cheaper hotel a bit further away.

We were chatting and she said she would come and meet us for breakfast at 10.30am

I explained that DS wakes around 6.30 and is ready for his breakfast at 7am.
I could probably distract him and at a big push take him down for breakfast at 8am

I also explained that it’s a 2 hour drive back home so Ideally we wanted to head home after an early breakfast.
There’s not much for DS to do in the hotel so once we’ve eaten it makes sense to leave.

She told me that 8am is too early for her and her husband (they don’t have kids) and that the best she can do is 10am.

I’ve suggested then that we skip breakfast and I will book a cheaper hotel a bit further away.

She’s since sent me a text telling me I’m being difficult and that my DS will be fine waiting for his breakfast until 10.30am for just one day.

I’m tempted to message back and say her and her husband will be fine having breakfast at 8am for just one day… 🙄

OP posts:
Clymene · 05/09/2021 10:48

You really do have reading comprehension issues @Rozziie

gingerbiscuits · 05/09/2021 10:57

She's clearly being an utter dick but is there any reason you can't give your son his breakfast as normal & then still meet them at 10am for brunch? Your son will probably be ready for a snack by then anyway.

FartVandelay · 05/09/2021 10:58

I'd cancel the cheque OP

gingerbiscuits · 05/09/2021 11:03

Sorry - just trawled through the updates - your 'friend' is bring completely selfish & ridiculous! Don't bend to fit her in - sod her - cheeky cow!

over2021 · 05/09/2021 11:06

@ChargingBuck no it's not, it's day trip to meet her friend. The OP says in her second update she is staying because it's a two hour drive. A two hour drive, in my opinion, does not normally warrant an overnight stay and arranging a cattery stay...

WeBuiltThisCityOnSausageRolls · 05/09/2021 11:15

@Clymene

You really do have reading comprehension issues *@Rozziie*
Rozziie has been like this throughout the thread unfortunately Hmm

There was suspicion discussed days ago that she posts like she's actually the friend . It would be a shame if she is, as she hasn't come across well.

As has been said multiple times, this thread was resolved back at 1.32pm on FRIDAY

gottastopeatingchocolate · 05/09/2021 11:21

Wow - there is a proper MN scrum over two friends who really don't seem to care that much about each other.

AlphabetStew · 05/09/2021 11:28

The OP last posted six pages ago Grin

Rozziie · 05/09/2021 11:31

@Clymene

You really do have reading comprehension issues *@Rozziie*
No, I really don't. I'm just able to see things from another perspective other than the narrative given by the OP, a skill most people here don't seem to possess.

Again, why did the OP post here? She doesn't want to understand, she wants everyone to agree the friend is awful for not understanding that she couldn't possibly stay an extra few hours for breakfast.

Rozziie · 05/09/2021 11:35

[quote over2021]@ChargingBuck no it's not, it's day trip to meet her friend. The OP says in her second update she is staying because it's a two hour drive. A two hour drive, in my opinion, does not normally warrant an overnight stay and arranging a cattery stay... [/quote]
Well the OP is special and different, you see. Nobody else in the history of the world has ever managed to go somewhere for a day without booking a cattery and a hotel. Nobody else has ever made brunch plans with a friend despite having a toddler. It sounds exhausting, the simplest little day out requiring this much effort and planning.

Perhaps next time OP should just not bother contacting the friend, since everything about her is clearly too much trouble.

JacquelineCarlyle · 05/09/2021 11:39

You're coming across quite nastily @Rozziie - not sure why given the nature of the thread? Confused

HyggeTygge · 05/09/2021 11:39

So, Rozz you read this from the OP:
Apparently she loves the safari park, hence why SHE suggested coming with us.

And concluded that the friend was "fitting in with all OP's plans on day one, and the one single thing she wanted to do (breakfast)," - i.e. did NOT want to go to the safari park.

Fair enough if you think the OP is incorrect, wrong, lying, isn't doing what you would choose to do, but just say that instead of arguing that your posts match what the OP has actually said.

ChargingBuck · 05/09/2021 11:41

[quote over2021]@ChargingBuck no it's not, it's day trip to meet her friend. The OP says in her second update she is staying because it's a two hour drive. A two hour drive, in my opinion, does not normally warrant an overnight stay and arranging a cattery stay... [/quote]
It's not what? - a holiday? Of course it is! A day trip to a safari park is a day's holiday, unless someone's invoicing for their time, surely?

Let me help your comprehension.
OP stayed in a hotel because she wanted to.
How is that 'unwarranted', & why are you harbouring a grievance about it?

HyggeTygge · 05/09/2021 11:46

Exactly Charging it's so fucking weird that so many posters are arguing that OP shouldn't stay in a hotel in her particular circumstances with her family, because they wouldn't do it in their particular circs and their own family, which - get this - might be DIFFERENT.

And the OP isn't at all about 'should I stay in a hotel or not?'! She's already decided that's what she would like to do!

This is worse that that thread about the OP who was given vouchers for an alternative treatment clinic, who had decided she absolutely did not want to use any of the treatments there and was wondering what to do with the vouchers/should she tell the giver.

cue 500 posts trying to convince her to use them because actually she SHOULD UNDERGO the treatments she'd researched and decided against.

JacquelineCarlyle · 05/09/2021 11:49

I remember that thread too @HyggeTygge - it really is quite strange these days. No one seems to be able to comprehend that people might like different things / behave differently or even think differently anymore. It's really worrying across the board!

JustLyra · 05/09/2021 11:49

Since when did an overnight stay one a trip away need to be warranted?

Four hours in a car in one day is no fun for a toddler. Hotels are generally quite low cost atm - why not stop over?

It’s quite hilarious on a site where so many people insist you have to spend ££££ on a holiday or it’ll be crap to think a night in a hotel at the end of a busy day is OTT.

Rozziie · 05/09/2021 11:49

@HyggeTygge

So, Rozz you read this from the OP: Apparently she loves the safari park, hence why SHE suggested coming with us.

And concluded that the friend was "fitting in with all OP's plans on day one, and the one single thing she wanted to do (breakfast)," - i.e. did NOT want to go to the safari park.

Fair enough if you think the OP is incorrect, wrong, lying, isn't doing what you would choose to do, but just say that instead of arguing that your posts match what the OP has actually said.

So what? She's still doing what OP had chosen to do. It's not as if she said 'oh safari park, boring, let's go to a museum', is it?

Again, for the millionth time, WHY did OP even contact her friend at all? What did she have in mind, exactly? She thinks the friend 'invited herself' to the safari park and dinner, she thinks the friend is unreasonable for wanting to meet for breakfast.

So what did she think they were going to do together?

JustLyra · 05/09/2021 11:51

The OP has at no point said she contacted her friend to specifically to tell her about the safari park trip.

That’s just something you’ve decided for yourself @Rozziie

Rozziie · 05/09/2021 11:56

@JustLyra

The OP has at no point said she contacted her friend to specifically to tell her about the safari park trip.

That’s just something you’ve decided for yourself @Rozziie

So the friend just magically knew she was going there then, did she?

Again, why did she contact her friend at all? I've yet to see an answer to this.

HyggeTygge · 05/09/2021 11:56

So what?

So do you concede that the friend wanted to go to the safari park?

myrtleWilson · 05/09/2021 11:58

@JustLyra

The OP has at no point said she contacted her friend to specifically to tell her about the safari park trip.

That’s just something you’ve decided for yourself @Rozziie

Friends may - and I know this may be a shocker to you Rozziie - can just update each other with whats happening in their lives, what upcoming plans they have. You've turned it in to some weird situation wherein the OP contacted the thread to almost deliberately dangle a safari trip in her face.
frazzledasarock · 05/09/2021 12:02

OP said
“ I told her we had planned to take DS and she suggested her and her DH come and meet us for the day.”

So the friend has barged in on OP’s family day.

JustLyra · 05/09/2021 12:02

So the friend just magically knew she was going there then, did she?

Again, why did she contact her friend at all? I've yet to see an answer to this.

Why did she contact her friend at all? Generally that’s what friends do. Chat to each other. Keep in touch.

If you don’t get that then it explains a lot about your aggressive tones on this thread.

Rozziie · 05/09/2021 12:11

@JustLyra

So the friend just magically knew she was going there then, did she?

Again, why did she contact her friend at all? I've yet to see an answer to this.

Why did she contact her friend at all? Generally that’s what friends do. Chat to each other. Keep in touch.

If you don’t get that then it explains a lot about your aggressive tones on this thread.

It's pretty bloody weird to contact a friend and specifically mention that you're going to be in their area when they're NOT welcome to join in your plans. It's actually extremely rude! I've got friends in Bristol and I can't imagine messaging them to say 'oh I'm going to be in Bristol this weekend, can't wait' if I wasn't expecting to meet up! You just don't say anything if you don't want to meet up for whatever reason...it's not that hard!

If you don't get that, it explains a lot about why you don't understand OP's friend's completely normal assumption that she was included.

HyggeTygge · 05/09/2021 12:13

So do you concede that the friend wanted to go to the safari park, Rozz?