Husband had son's head shaved

[SooooooAnnoyed]

We agreed he needed a haircut before school starts and he has had nice short cuts in the past which is what I expected but, to my horror, he brought him home from the barber with a practically shaved head. He is only 4 and I would only shave his head if he had lice or ringworms or some other disease of the scalp. It's also getting colder so I wonder why he thought this was a good idea. AIBU to be really annoyed by this?

oh dear, that's a bit cruel of your Husband, I would hate doing that to a child, as it generally will look awful. I love to see little lads with nice hair, even though it might be a little unruly at times.

I don't think it's right, but my sons' primary (and secondary) schools would also have sent them home for fully shaved heads - hair must be a minimum of grade 2 all over.

It's just hair!

I took my son to the barber last time and he came back fairly scalped. The guy was way over enthusiastic. Can't imagine DH coming onto some sort of forum to moan about me though!

Come on OP, what does "practically shaved" mean?

Do you really mean shaved OP? Or just shorter than you would like or choose?

@WomanStanleyWoman - agreed! Why are some so keen to do exactly as school dictates? Where is the individuality?

So it’s a bit shorter than normal. Hardly the end of the world, give it a few weeks and it will be grown again. Just saves money as it will be longer before it needs doing again!

It's hair, it grows. In a few weeks he will look fine.

Fuming. I think it looks really thuggish and I don't blame you for being angry. I would be livid.

How short actually is it!? My boys always got a no3 all over until well up in primary school because of nits.

[quote DownWhichOfLate]@WomanStanleyWoman - agreed! Why are some so keen to do exactly as school dictates? Where is the individuality?[/quote]
Because if you don't adhere to the schools rules they send your child home

Just watched a video of hair shaving grades. Jeez a 2 is very very short...so is a 3.
I hate the way those cuts look, it's like no definition, just a blob of weird looking fluff on someone's head.
What's happened to people having partings?!

Sounds like a matter of communication - if he's had "nice short cuts" in the past, where is the line between a nice short cut and "practically shaved"? One person might think a number two is fine, others that it's like a new recruit for the army. A lot of people especially women who aren't used to clippers terminology wouldn't know what the numbers mean, so unless you have a picture as an example or specify a mm/cm length of hair, it's difficult to make sure everyone including the barber is on the same page.

As many other posters have said, hair grows, it's not life or death. If a kid doesn't have some embarrassing cut their own hair with crayola scissors type story or dad/gran did something drastic before school photo day experience, have they really lived!

It'll grow

Do fathers generally get consulted before mothers take their sons to the barber's?

I mean, I'd be annoyed too, but I'm not sure I'd be reasonable to be so. Unless of course the father knew I hated shaved heads.

@Theunamedcat - that’s rather a “cut your nose to spite your face” attitude from the school. Surely they should be making sure attendance is as high as possible rather than worrying about a hair cut / skirt length / shoe colour.

What’s the school policy?
If it meant he was going to have a problem at school I’d be majorly pissed off.
If it’s just not to my taste/worried he will be cold/worried he will look like he had lice etc well I’d just suck it up and ask him not to go so short again.

@HerRoyalRisesAgain, It's a number 1 haircut but I see more scalp than hair. DS could tell I was upset with his father as soon as they came home but I told him he looked handsome as I always do after he has had his hair cut. I don't want to diminish his confidence. I don't know if the school has a hair policy because I've not had a reason to look it up. I don't see other children his age with such short cuts and I don't want others making him feel self conscious about it.

I'm sure I'll cool off soon enough (I am already a little less upset than earlier). It is hair and will grow back, after all. It was just quite shocking as he normally has thick, dark, curly hair.

Thank you all for your comments.

I think it's highly unlikely a primary school would suspend or put a 4 year old in isolation because of a bad haircut . That would be barbaric. More likely they'd say please don't let it happen again.

I can imagine it's quite a change. It may be worth checking school policy just to make sure he's not on breach of it, or maybe just having a word with the teacher that it was cut shorter than expected but should grow out in a couple of weeks.

It will soon grow, op, honestly in a couple of weeks his head will be well covered.

Maybe next time you should take him for a hair cut, some dads have no idea. I remember my father in law taking my son to the barber and he came with a 1950s short back and sides!

[quote DownWhichOfLate]@Theunamedcat - that’s rather a “cut your nose to spite your face” attitude from the school. Surely they should be making sure attendance is as high as possible rather than worrying about a hair cut / skirt length / shoe colour.[/quote]
Yea I agree. I could maybe understand with older children who are choosing wild hair styles ( though even then I personally don’t care) but what would be achieved by sending a young child, who has no control over their hair home. Presumably that would mean the child has been excluded?

Yikes. What was the father thinking? Did you ask? Did you say school may not be happy with it?

So state schools still have policies on too short hair? If so, that's ridiculous- how does having a shaved head affect learning?

To moral of this story is never trust your DH taking your DS to the barber. I never let DH take the DC for haircuts, but I also promised DH I'd never cut the DCs hair myself. we may have trust issues

Wow , any kind of buzz cut looks awful on primary age children.