WIBU discharging myself from hospital

[Carrottopppp]

Sorry if this is long but it's important I tell you every detail to give the full story. Saturday evening I woke from a nap to find myself really sore and swollen in my groin and part of my pubis, overnight it swelled considerably went really red and painful to walk, sit, stand etc, I called OOH gp Sunday morning who got me an urgent appointment at our urgent treatment centre within A&E. App was at 9.30am with an absolutely lovely doctor who left no stone unturned and said I had developed an abscess and it needed draining urgently due to the risk of sepsis and the fact it had literally appeared out of nowhere and had grown 4x4 inches literally overnight. He got me an appointment with emergency surgical ambulatory care for 2.15pm yesterday, I attended the nurse took one look and said "no surgeon on this ward will touch that as it is on your pubis not your groin" she sent me back to urgent care and the doctor I saw that morning took me back to his room had another look then said its definitely a groin abscess but we'll let gynae have a look anyway, he sent me up to the gynae ward, 3 different doctors took a look but it was the most senior surgeon on the ward who said it actually is groin, not his area of expertise and also due to the amount of blood vessels in the area he couldn't touch it, so I waited and he came back and said I had to go back to emergency surgical ambulatory care as its them who deal with these things. So off I went an as soon as I walked in I was met by the same nurse who told me she had spoken to a surgeon up on surgical assessment ward and that they were waiting for me and expecting me and I may be treated as a golden patient I. E doctor has a look at it then books me a time to go back the next day and have it removed so off I went up to the ward.

Now this is where I started losing my rag mentally, met by a nurse on the ward who asks another lady to show me to my bed and she said "ill be with you in a minute" yeah you guessed it, never saw her again. I was shown my bed obs done and that's it never saw anybody again, nobody knew when the doctor was coming to speak to me, nobody could tell me whether or not I could eat or drink by this point I hadn't eaten in 26 hours, Its on my notes that I'm on antibiotics yet nobody asked if I was due any (I was but mine were at home as nobody told me when all this started that I would become an inpatient), I waited hours, I had absolutely no overnight stuff with me, I got frustrated and I went to the nurses station to let them know I'm discharging myself and have someone call me to arrange to go back in when it's convenient. The nurse couldn't even find the doctors number to call and ask permission to sign off the discharge, and with that I left.

So to clarify I'd been in and out of hospital for 12 hours, I was no further forward than knowing I had an abscess, i had 4 doctors, 2 nurses and a receptionist all having a gander at my genitals, I was passed from place to place, I walked in agony the entire length of our hospital 1/2 mile 3 times, nobody could tell me what the hell was happening and all the prodding and poking aggravated the abscess to the point it doubled in size and started spreading down my leg. WIBU, maybe I was but I was frustrated, tired and I hadn't eaten in 28 hours. I'm planning on attending A&E this morning and hopefully try and get somewhere, I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

@Carrottopppp

With my antibiotics I can't eat an hour before or 2 hours after, when I left hospital I knew I was past due them so couldn't eat and when I got home and took them it was late at night I was counting down the 2 hours until I could eat but I fell asleep on the sofa before my 2 hours was up, I woke in the early hours went to bed, I took todays at 7am so I can't eat until 9am but if I'm going back to hospital then eating when my 2 hours is up will delay surgery further as I have to be nil by mouth for so long until I can get back to hospital and find out a rough time it will be happening it's best to just not eat

It is NOT best ‘just not to eat’ if you’re saying you haven’t eaten in over 24 hours already and you don’t have a time booked in for surgery.

For god’s sake eat something right now before you attend A&E.

@Carrottopppp

I do know I'll be right back where I started and I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'll most likely be kept in but I'm also right back where I started in regards to not eating, I still haven't eaten and most likely can't from now so by the time I do get my surgery I'm probably looking at a minimum of 2 days without food or drink, even if I had stayed last night I'd still be sat waiting in hospital with no food or drink, surely that's wrong

Oh my god just have something to eat for gods sake 🤦🏻‍♀️ you still don't know when you're surgery is actually going to be so have something light, like a slice of plain toast and clear fluids (water or black tea or coffee) and that'll sort you out for now. Stop being such a martyr!

If you eat now, you’ll be nil by mouth by the time you get into surgery even if you’re treated as an emergency. You’re not going to have surgery today unless your life literally depends upon it being done today. And if it were that serious they will remove your stomach contents. Surely you can see that, can’t you?

You’re not a doctor OP and you can’t just decide what sort of treatment you get and where, and how to fit it into your life

Sorry OP but you are sounding very immature. I appreciate that you are ill, emotional, worried and upset as well as hungry. Given all this, you are unlikely to be thinking clearly.
You ‘don’t understand why I need to be admitted or need a GA’ because you aren’t medically trained. You are really making poor decisions for your health, family and work.
Get back there now, give them ALL relevant information (inc when last ate or drank) and you will get IV fluids if needed. Hope you get better soon and gave a smooth recovery.

I don't disagree that the communication around your treatment seems to have been very, very poor.

However, it hospital they can rehydrate you, and give you vitamins and electrolytes during the times you are not eating.

Unfortunately now the entire process will need to start again - that means waiting for a bed, waiting for surgery - and those waits are going to worse as it's bank holiday weekend.

Plenty of people eat before surgery, particularly if it's emergency surgery - it does make things more complicated re anaesthesia and it is not the chosen method.

It is unlikely you will be back in work tomorrow as you may require IV antibiotics if this has grown has much as you said it has.

I hope when you go in today you get dealt with in a timely manner and that the communication is much better. I understand where you are coming from and from my personal experiences with A&E and hospital wards - never came across a good team in the night shifts but have always had excellent care during the day shifts. Never had a full team of nurses from the hospital in the night shifts - mostly bank staff who in my experience were laid back, non communicative, did not take notes properly etc etc and made me want to self discharge but I wasn’t in the circumstances you were with hunger and kids at home with just partner.

I’m sorry you were passed from pillar to post and made to walk around the hospital. I’m sorry the hospital was evidently busy and no one saw you on the ward straight away. I’m sorry but the NHS is a mess right now and even if we don’t work with Covid we are knackered from covering shifts and staffing is shocking. So the staff nurses were probably run off their Surgeons are busy and sometimes their communication is minimal because

If you hadn’t of left you would of been seen by someone, you could of pressed your call buzzer or gone to the station to explain you hadn’t eaten. The surgeons could of been contacted wether you could of eaten or needed IV fluids of surgery

You've made it a lot worse by self discharging. You won't still be in the system you'll be back to square one.

You've missed morning ward round, this is when you are seen by the consultants and most of the decisions are made. Normally golden patient means first on the list for surgery the next morning. Sounds like you've missed your theatre slot as well.

Urgent means needs to be done in the next few days. Emergency theatres are full with genuinely life threatening cases, and theatre space is allocated according to clinical need. Someone about to lose their airway will take precedence over a groin abscess for obvious reasons.

You chose to not eat for that time. The hospital have kept you nbm from 9am in case you got an emergency theatre slot.

The only person who didn't know what team should see you was the nurse. Everyone else seemed to know it should be the surgical team. Doctors are busy and sometimes there is a long wait, no one would have been sat twiddling their thumbs

Unfortunately you have massively shot yourself in the foot by leaving. It is likely you will be back at square 1 with a&e, as it’s not a&e who deal with this stuff - once you’ve left a&e, you’ve left. You can pick up where you left off. Similarly, by discharging yourself it is likely that you’ve lost your space on the surgical list.

I know it’s frustrating and upsetting. I have been in and out of hospital myself and there have been a couple of times where I have been waiting for hours and hours with no food and drink in the hope of being operated on that day.

Unfortunately this is the reality of the NHS - underfunded and short staffed. It’s not perfect at all, but we do at least have it.

Get yourself back to hospital, stop throwing a tantrum because things aren't happening fast enough for your liking, and apologise to everyone, many, many times for making their job harder and wasting everyone's time.

Hospital is just a hotel for sick people run by nurses to make it easier for you to get the care you need when someone is available to do it. You might be seen in a few hours, others may be worse than you so it might take a few days - you are not more important than everyone else.

Oops sent too early.
You could have fluids if surgery was too soon too eat. You could of also had in antibiotics which usually surgeons like to give at least a couple of doses with a really bad infection.

I’m sorry you now have to start again but please note that urgent in hospital does not mean immediate and life threatening emergencies always will go ahead of you. It may be very inconvenient and you didn’t have the greatest of experiences but you have to be patient and seen.

You are not unreasonable to be frustrated by what happened. You would not have been unreasonable to complain about things such as not being given anything to drink or having your antibiotics missed. I think walking out was somewhat foolish, but if you understand the risks it is your right to do so.

However, walking back in now and expecting to be done as you would have if you had stayed is unreasonable. By discharging yourself you have given up your slot- so you will have to wait until the next available one- unless your condition worsens to the point of a acute emergency (at present it sounds like it is a needs done very soon but not a drop-everything and to theatre now case). Turning up at A&E won’t necessarily mean you get the procedure done in the same time frame as when you were in an in-patient bed- things will be done by clinical need and someone may have taken the slot they had earmarked for you.

It sounds like the hospital are very busy- we are sitting at winter levels of bed occupancy and are short-staffed (more than usual). It does help patients, of course, but it is unlikely to be because they just can’t be bothered. This weekend there was one junior doctor for 3 or wards in our hospital. Oh, and one senior registrar for each specialty. All it takes is a few really sick patients/urgent surgical cases and things are manic. I recognise that this won’t help your feeling of frustration but it might explain why things were very slow and you could not get answers in a timely manner.

Drs are not ten a penny, and even if they were they are busy. Mornings are for ward rounds. Weekends are a pain as less consultants etc on so it was likely more difficult to have you seen but really you should’ve been out on one ward and dealt with there than all this moving about and the nurses could’ve advocated for you here, especially seeing as you were sore, tired and hungry it’s not a nice feeling. Sometimes they are really busy though and someone tells one person something but gets caught up and doesn’t get the chance to pass it on in a timely fashion so things are delayed. Staffing is short everywhere just now. That’s not your fault but the staff are doing their best I’m sure. Sometimes you do just have to wait. I had kidney stones recently and had to try and sit all day in a&e and urgent care then go home in agony for ct the next day walk miles to it wait hours walk miles back in pain and feeling crap it’s just how it is sadly.

I hope you get treated soon, your kids will cope they need to know you’re not well, I’m a nurse so I’m on my feet too, but if I’m not well I’m not well I’m no use to anyone! Your partner needs to look after your kids and sort them out so you can get the care you need. Stay in one place and ask for better communication as not knowing is making you very anxious, speak to the nurse sister/charge nurse where you are too, hope you get it drained abs feel better v soon

I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

I was with you till I read this part

Christ. I wouldn't have discharged myself after 12 hrs if I had a bed. That's peanuts. I think you've been extremely silly.

I can fully understand your frustration. The combination of pain, exhaustion and being passed from pillar to post can make rational thought disappear. However, what you need to prioritise is getting treatment. Eat something, pack a bag and go back to hospital being prepared to wait. Good luck.

I can understand that you were tired, scared and in pain. The nurses should have done something to dissuade you from leaving.

You do need to go back but you also need to contact pals and lodge a complaint about the poor communication. Is there anyone who can go with you and advocate for you.

Good luck.

Enough about reasonable already said by pp. Hoping you are reading this in A&E or even hospital ward. If not close the browser and MN down and go.

I hope you've eaten, packed overnight belongings, snacks, water, medication and a note of any prescriptions you're on.

Obviously sepsis is deadly and so worrying about being pain free at work tomorrow is ridiculous.

Yanbu to be frustrated, but yabu to leave.

Having been taken straight to resus with a child and a dozen doctors, I would Always rather wait days than be the medical emergency. Perspective helps OP, get some.

It’s sounds like you haven’t had the best care. Unfortunately you won’t be any better off discharging yourself you won’t get anywhere going back to a&e as they will just pass u back to the surgeons as it isn’t their expertise so u will be back to square one. I never understand why people do that!
You would have been better off staying put, asking to speak to the ward manager or ringing PALS from your hospital bed and making a complaint

I’m amazed you’re complaining about being in and out of a&e for 12 hours. That’s…normal, especially if they’re not sure who’s going to be dealing with you.

Can you explain your comment about almost going into a coma because you hadn’t eaten for a day? I don’t understand that at all

@Carrottopppp

I'm currently in the process of packing some stuff, and I'm following the antibiotic to a T as they are my only protection until I can get this thing removed, I just don't understand why I need to be admitted and why it needs to be under a general, I'm having my carpal tunnel cut under a local so why can't I be drained with a local, I have a huge fear of general anesthetic surgery. I had an abscess on the back of my throat when I was 14 it about closed my throat up yet I was just given antibiotics and sent in my way, it burst itself after a week and that was it

Practicalities. To numb something with local you either need to inject all the way around it, or you need to give a nerve block by injecting local anaesthestic near the nerves further upstream.

Numbing around it is really only suitable for something superficial (removing a mole or a tooth). It's unlikely to work well for a groin abscess because it's too deep.

It's also bad practice to inject local anaesthetic immediately around an area of acute infection, because in doing so you spread the infection. Plus infection changes the pH of your tissues, which makes the local anaesthetic less effective. So, injecting local round the area may not work and might make things worse.

Blocking the nerves upstream works really well for your hand/wrist (so for the carpal tunnel surgery you have planned) because there's plenty of places up the arm you can do it. But how do you inject the nerves upstream from your groin? Basically the only option would be an epidural, which is in itself a highly skilled procedure for which they may not have enough staff on a Sunday.

But by all means ask the surgeon doing it if they think it can be done under local. I'm sure if it's possible they will do so.

I don't understand how I've lost my place on the surgery list when I wasn't even on it until the doctor had done their rounds and even the nurses didn't know when that would be. The hospital wasn't even busy, I went to urgent care twice and I was the only one in there, I passed A&E 3 times and again nobody in there either, all 3 wards I attended again nurses, doctors etc all stood around with next to no patients. The only time that was wasted was my own, I did everything that was asked of me in regards to going to so many different wards to figure out who should be seeing to me, I didn't eat or drink just in case, I happily agreed to letting so many different people examine a very private area even though it turned out its not their problem. I did what I was supposed to do until it got to the point where this is my health on the line yet I had no control over it, I had no idea what was going on with MY BODY, I'm supposed to just sit there wait for somebody to eventually let me know what the hell is going on, my entire life can't just come to a halt because nobody knows what the the other is doing

@ivykaty44

I'm due back in work tomorrow and need it removing as my job requires me to be on my feet for 8 hours a day and don't want to be walking around in pain.

I was with you till I read this part

What’s wrong with that part?