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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Fed up with neighbours

250 replies

Homeontherangeuk · 27/08/2021 15:14

Bit of a back story, we live in a new development... Here 6 years, we signed a clause to say we wouldn't change door colour, fence height etc... However neighbour has raised the shared boundary fence to 2.5m (terrace house) & its so ugly.. We told them we hate it & they flipped.. We told them its too high, werw told fuck off, now anytime we try to use our garden they play banging house music... Today they put the speakers on full blast & have gone out for the day.. Beautiful day but my kids can't enjoy the sun... I'm at my wits end, hubby is sick of the childish antics.... Last night I was sitting out reading my book quietly with a glass of wine, at 10 ó clock I was drenched by a hose over the fence... They claimed it was their 2 year old when hubby rang in a fit.. No way would a 2 year old have the motor skills to control a hose, drench me, our patio & proceed to drench the clothes line... Bawling here, our dream home is turning into a nightmare... What can we do? They have blocked us from messaging, hung up on DH, blank us... Our home is in such an ideal location, we don't want to or aren't in the position to sell...
No cctv so can't prove who drenched me... DH was working last night, I felt very shaken & worried afterwards but held my ground & stayed out listening to them bitching about us... Before the fence we had a great relationship with them.... I regret saying anything now...

OP posts:
VenusTiger · 27/08/2021 18:44

You need to start recording EVERYTHING OP. Put a camera in bedroom window. They won't see it.
Voice record on mobile.
Police won't do a thing without hard evidence.

Marmelace · 27/08/2021 18:48

I wouldn't be surprised if they were on drugs, and I'm not saying the odd spliff.

Whatinthelord · 27/08/2021 18:49

My lord op they sound absolutely horrid. I’m in 2 minds about if you should up the ante and start doing the same back to them or carry on ignoring it.

I would def get some CCTV and start recording any incidents like the hose being sprayed over. Is there anywhere you can put CCTV to cover your garden?

JacquelineCarlyle · 27/08/2021 18:49

Can your own hose accidentally soak their side of the fence and wreck the speaker?

Original poster
Homeontherangeuk · 27/08/2021 18:50

Thanks everyone, so tempted to get DH to get his stick again but won't rise to the bait, which it obviously is... I think accusing us of vandalism for turning off a speaker with a stick is a bit 🙄 & it's obviously still in perfect working order! Its not as loud this time but won't touch...!

OP posts:
Pastnowfuture · 27/08/2021 18:52

No advice but lots of sympathy. Must be awful for you and your DH. I hope things get better.

DeathStare · 27/08/2021 18:52

I think you only really have three options:

  1. Try to ignore it and hope in time they stop - though this may never happen
  2. Involve the police - might stop it, or might make it worse, but either way would create an issue if you needed to sell.
  3. Move.

If its affecting your relationship and your wellbeing then I'd go for option 3.

hookiewookie29 · 27/08/2021 18:57

OP, can you shoot the speaker with an air rifle........?😉😉

FrankGrillosWrist · 27/08/2021 18:59

The bastards! Report the loud music to your local council, you can do this online. Hose piping someone is criminal assault. Don’t just leave it OP as it will only get worse. My neighbours are noisy cunts, but they appear to be very nice apart from that.

tenredthings · 27/08/2021 19:02

Buy an Annoy-a tron and hide it in their garden

winterchills · 27/08/2021 19:03

This is absolutely awful 😞 I would keep trying to ignore in the hope they will get bored! If not then you will have to report them

Original poster
Homeontherangeuk · 27/08/2021 19:05

Thanks everyone 🥰 definitely wasn't the 2 year old as our garden furniture is beside the shared fence... Due to flower beds etc we can only put it here... The hose seemed to go directly over the fence on top of my head for 10 seconds then proceeded to spray the patio & all the washing on the line... Regardless of the situation if my children behaved like this I'd make them apologise straight away & admonish them strongly... There was no children to be heard, it came from nowhere at 10 am...

OP posts:
Luckymummytoone · 27/08/2021 19:05

I second the drugs comment!

Luckymummytoone · 27/08/2021 19:06

What type of people were they before this started? I know you said you got on but did you ever see a side like this to them?

Ohfgswhat · 27/08/2021 19:07

Agree, what bastards!
From personal experience, you have to move. It's not your dream home if you feel intimidated and hesitant to go home. Living on eggshells, what's next? If you report them to any 'body' you should declare it on sale. This situation will grow arms and legs! It's so bloody time consuming for you both. You have a new build, there's others out there just as lovely, without the arseholes. Don't waste your time, energy or good humour on the bastards. I feel for you.

Rosiiiiie · 27/08/2021 19:08

This reminds me of the show ‘killer neighbours’. Stupid little disagreements between neighbours that escalate into murder. Basically the main advice from the show was to ignore the behaviour to not encourage it any further. Good luck!

Whatinthelord · 27/08/2021 19:08

Maybe you should invite a load of friends over and have a rave to their music…with full on rave outfits too. If they turn it off knock the door and as them to higher it up!!!

Original poster
Homeontherangeuk · 27/08/2021 19:12

I was saying to hubby we should start making little comments like "aren't they great to provide the tunes"?!
"wonder if they'll take some requests"
Pity they don't provide the drinks etc... He's very soft & wants us to say absolutely nothing..

OP posts:
Original poster
Homeontherangeuk · 27/08/2021 19:13

As regards a move, we really aren't in a position but had thought about it for secondary school but that's still 6 years away.. Maybe we should just get our ducks in order & ignore ignore ignore... Will absolutely get the pair of ear phones...

OP posts:
SMabbutt · 27/08/2021 19:15

I would put in a harassment complaint and explai what rhey are doung tgen ask if it can be noted and phone to let the police know when they go out and leave music blaring. If they come round itcwill be obvious they are deliberately being antisocial. You could also video with your phone showing the position of the speakers, the volume and you knocking to ask them to turn it off. Definitely get CCTV for further evidence and grow whatever plants you want but make sure they don't attach to their fence or go over on to their side so they have no legal right to touch them.

AntiSocialDistancer · 27/08/2021 19:17

Normally I'd say to move but it sounds like your home is ideal so I would wage an absolute war path until they have no option but to leave you in peace and never speak to you again.

Every small thing would be a confrontation with them so they dont keep stepping over your mental boundaries. They will escalate short term but eventually run out of energy. CCTV (not into their garden)

Nuisance neighbour team, police for harrassment. Video and sound evidence where necessary. Make it the councils problem as much as yours. Solicitors, the lot.

ChikiTIKI · 27/08/2021 19:19

How about "when does DJ Bellend start his set again? I heard its gonna be a great one today!"

BecauseMyRingBurnsSheila · 27/08/2021 19:22

It's harassment. Keep a log of them going in and out with video evidence of them keeping the music on when they are out. Then contact police with all the evidence. CCTV would be a lot cheaper than moving house.

bagelsandoranges · 27/08/2021 19:22

@AntiSocialDistancer

Normally I'd say to move but it sounds like your home is ideal so I would wage an absolute war path until they have no option but to leave you in peace and never speak to you again.

Every small thing would be a confrontation with them so they dont keep stepping over your mental boundaries. They will escalate short term but eventually run out of energy. CCTV (not into their garden)

Nuisance neighbour team, police for harrassment. Video and sound evidence where necessary. Make it the councils problem as much as yours. Solicitors, the lot.

Agree with this
Motnight · 27/08/2021 19:26

This all sounds awful. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.