Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 13 14

Original poster

To enjoy being a bit skint

337 replies

Welcometotheterrorzone · 26/08/2021 08:39

I realise this might sound really privileged to some.
We are by no means struggling to pay our mortgage or buy food. We both have alright jobs, low paid but steady and enough to pay for a lovely house in a rough part of town. Like I said, we do alright but have to budget in order to have Christmas and holidays. We camp, we don't eat out, we share subscriptions with friends, we have one car, we buy second hand everything, we use freetogo apps etc to save. I am an obsessive yellow sticker shopper and do not pay full price for any meat, bread, milk or fruit as I hit different supermarkets at different times and have a huge freezer to store it all in. We eat veggie 70% of the time too.
Yesterday it was a one off treat day for DS as he's starting school. I had £24 for the day and no access to anymore money. We had such a lovely time, bakery lunch, went to a national trust place where just going in the grounds is a lot cheaper than tickets for the house so did that, treated them to an ice lolly and found a Poundland on the way home for a toy instead of getting (the same quality) toy in the gift shop. I was a bit worried at one point as we walked past this amazing sweet shop and I thought that they were going to ask for something I couldn't afford (only had £2 left by this point as we were on our way to the train station) but brilliantly they had a reduced section with these Harry Potter chocolate bars for 50p so still had a £1 at the end of it.
My aibu is that I don't want to lose this feeling of joy that we have found something that fits our budget and makes me feel like I'm treating them. I've had times where I felt really down that I can't just say 'choose whatever you like' but I think every parent sets limits so I'm not being unnecessary harsh. I'm trying to teach them to find pleasure in small things, and that finding the right toy in a charity shop is better than going to a big toy shop full of plastic where you can choose anything. I hope they don't resent me for it.
Luckily it's payday tomorrow!

OP posts:

AuraofDora · 26/08/2021 08:43

Sounds a brilliant day out and you’re canny, clever with money and know the value not the cost

Notcontent · 26/08/2021 08:44

I am assuming you don’t mean to offend anyone but really, your post is so out of touch….

handtofold · 26/08/2021 08:46

You had £24 for the day OP. Of course you didn't mind/got a bit of enjoyment of out a 'being skint' novelty!

Try having £24 left for the rest of the week, two weeks even.

LunaTheCat · 26/08/2021 08:46

Oh - you sound so so lovely - your child is lucky to have you.
I think you are more creative and appreciative with less money.
May the moon and the stars smile upon you.

pinkflask · 26/08/2021 08:46

Well, I agree in one way - I take pleasure in getting the most out of my money. For example I know a great park in a village nearby where not many people go. Instead of taking kids to an attraction we went there with friends and a picnic and stayed for two hours. I enjoyed knowing they’d had a great day for free!

But I think YABU to say you enjoy being skint as you’re not really - it’s playing at being skint if you’re still off to NT places and buying sweets. £24 is a LOT to spend on a day out, not a cheap day!

icedcoffees · 26/08/2021 08:46

SparklingLime · 26/08/2021 08:47

Jesus, this is so blinkered and yes - offensive to people who are actually “skint” and struggling hard with it.

Original poster

Welcometotheterrorzone · 26/08/2021 08:49

Well I did put that I knew I was privileged at the top of the post. I did also say that this was a treat day and not our average day. I don't earn much and I don't have £24 for every day of the summer holidays, mostly as i work full time.

OP posts:

Hadenoughofthisbullshit · 26/08/2021 08:52

You don’t seem skint to me op, sorry.

icedcoffees · 26/08/2021 08:52

Talk about being totally oblivious to how some people live.

You're not skint.

thinkofablinkingnamewoman · 26/08/2021 08:52

Well this hits new heights of insensitive. Could you really not see as you typed this how offensive it is to play at being poor?

CanICelebrate · 26/08/2021 08:52

I think people are being harsh on you @Welcometotheterrorzone

You’ve acknowledged that to some your situation is privileged yet for many others £24 for a day is not a lot of money.

It sounds like a lovely day and I think it’s pretty clear what you meant is that you enjoy budgeting and finding things to do and buy that are bargains

PostMenPatWithACat · 26/08/2021 08:53

You are doing what millions do op and are clearly an excellent money manager and cut your cloth. We had lovely free days out most if the time when the children were small.

I am sorry you are getting flak on here. It's inevitable and not a nice side of MNet. People have missed all the bits about rigorous budgeting to have £24 left at the end of the month.

Good luck with the first day at school.

Hadenoughofthisbullshit · 26/08/2021 08:53

It’s good that you are able to stick to a budget though.

icedcoffees · 26/08/2021 08:54

I am sorry you are getting flak on here. It's inevitable and not a nice side of MNet.

Personally I don't think it's very nice to post about "loving being skint" when you're clearly not skint.

Timeforredwine · 26/08/2021 08:55

I completely get where you are coming from, i get pleasure from taking children somewhere free, going to charity shop for toy etc, i get you meant not £24 every day, good for you. No need for anyone to nr offended.

Bluntness100 · 26/08/2021 08:56

I’m not sure this is advisable op. No one enjoys being poor. And having 24 pounds disposable income for a day out is more than many have.

There is something very odd about declaring you just love to be poor.

RubyGoat · 26/08/2021 08:57

You're right. It does sound privileged. A car, owning your own lovely home, holidays, both employed, trips out, a huge freezer (which of course needs a decent sized kitchen or other space to store it in).
No-one who is actually skint enjoys it. Try it for several years, then come back to us.

AubergineParmigiana · 26/08/2021 08:57

If you're by no means struggling to pay mortgage or buy food, you're not skint.

Bluntness100 · 26/08/2021 08:58

@PostMenPatWithACat

You are doing what millions do op and are clearly an excellent money manager and cut your cloth. We had lovely free days out most if the time when the children were small.

I am sorry you are getting flak on here. It's inevitable and not a nice side of MNet. People have missed all the bits about rigorous budgeting to have £24 left at the end of the month.

Good luck with the first day at school.

No one has missed anything, how offensive, and families who actually are skint will find the declaration that she loves if so she can budget odd verging on offensive.

Original poster

Welcometotheterrorzone · 26/08/2021 08:58

@icedcoffees I've been really skint. I've been the person crying on the phone to HMRC when they stopped my tax credits for six months. Ive had to explain to my boss that I would have to resign as no tax credits means I can't afford childcare so therefore won't be able to work. I've still got debt from that time. Things are a lot better now that I'm not paying childcare for two kids. What my post was saying was that I don't want to lose this, I don't want to ever think that finding a quid isn't really exciting. I don't want to become. This choice (being able to spend money) is sometimes daunting (as there were days when I couldn't ever spend money) and I find it hard to not go crazy and buy my kids everything.

OP posts:

Hadenoughofthisbullshit · 26/08/2021 08:58

It's inevitable and not a nice side of MNet.

Can you imagine what it’s like for people who genuinely have no money to read about people who ‘just go camping’ (££££) or ‘use the reduced section at the supermarket’, and brag about how smart they are online. It’s playing pauper and it’s not very nice actually.

Sobeyondthehills · 26/08/2021 08:58

Try having that £24 to get you through the fucking 6 weeks of summer holidays and then come back and tell me you like being skint

HarrietsChariot · 26/08/2021 08:59

People have missed all the bits about rigorous budgeting to have £24 left at the end of the month.

But that's the point - there are an awful lot of people who rigorously budget themselves just to survive, not to allow themselves the luxury of having £24 to fritter away on a day out.

Not criticizing the OP directly here but this attitude of thinking you are poor (or a victim of abuse, or of racism, or an unfair society) when you are demonstrably in a much better position than many others isn't helpful at all, it just pushes the idea that you are more deserving than than other people - it's their fault they are worse off.

wedwewerpink · 26/08/2021 08:59

Because having more money would take the fun out of it?? wow why don't you reduce it next week and set yourself a new challenge?...you know...for fun!! FFS

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 13 14

Swipe left for the next trending thread