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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU princess parties is this what we are inspiring our girls to be ?

239 replies

bottleitsellit · 21/08/2021 15:09

Just been to a Princess birthday party, my first one. So a women acts as your princess of choice with the wig and outfit and runs the party games instead of the parents. I just feel so sad about how all the girls were gushing over it. I suppose I wasn't brought up with princesses as my mum was very much a tomboy and I have lots of older brothers. My girls have fairies, witches amongst their toys just as my DS has dragons, Harry Potter, but we have really haven't gone with princesses as it's a bit old fashioned, a knight on a horse saving you. Maybe it's just me, they will prob now want princess everything 😬

OP posts:
PumpkinKlNG · 21/08/2021 15:55

All children are different, mine is obsessed with princesses and Disney and Barbie, just because your children don’t like it doesn’t mean others don’t 😕

AngryWhompingWillow · 21/08/2021 15:55

@bottleitsellit Guess your daughters will be working on building sites and oil rigs when they're grown then, and your sons will be nail technicians, and barmaids.

Good for you. You must be soooo proud. DOWN WITH THE PATRIARCHY!!! Wink

Sparklingbrook · 21/08/2021 15:56

Sounds fine to me. If it was a boy having a princess party people on here would be waving their pom poms probably. Grin

DC tend to have a theme they like at parties. Had to buy all the matching cups, plates and tablecloths generally. Their choice. I

Starjammer · 21/08/2021 15:57

I think most kids just like a mix of stuff, surely? DD has unicorns, dinosaurs, trains, rainbows, mermaids, airplanes, building blocks, dolls, toy kitchen, pretend tools. She just likes a range of different things (plus I am also partial to a rainbow unicorn 🦄).

DrSbaitso · 21/08/2021 15:57

@Tocktock

The Prince in Frozen turned out to be a complete arse didn't he?
Yes, and Elsa was quite right to tell Anna she couldn't possibly know him or love him when they'd only met that evening. But at the same time, it wasn't surprising that Anna was primed to be taken advantage of by an opportunistic abuser when she had been kept so lonely all her life and desperate for someone to love her openly.

SUCH a great film!!!

kaleidoscopeheartless · 21/08/2021 15:57

Why does it matter what kind of party a child has as long as the children had fun!

Tocktock · 21/08/2021 16:00

Yes, solid psychotherapy training right there!

DrSbaitso · 21/08/2021 16:00

We were all raised on worse stories than Disney etc are producing now.

modernlifestrife · 21/08/2021 16:00

@lazylinguist is articulating this much better than I can.

I feel some of this is pushed on girls to like princesses as they are what girls like.

WorraLiberty · 21/08/2021 16:00

You feel so sad that kids were enjoying a party with a particular theme?

Yeah that's tragic Confused

Starjammer · 21/08/2021 16:01

(Off topic, but @DrSbaitso, your name has reminded me of many fun hours on my grandpa's computer typing in silly questions to Sr Sbaitso with my best friend Grin I had forgotten all about it)

Gimlisaxe · 21/08/2021 16:02

@bottleitsellit

I suppose I'm just shocked how much Disney is still an influence. We have tried to watch Frozen, but neither DD's haven't warmed to it, DS watched it a bit, he liked the snowman. They haven't seen any of the older classic Disney princess films. We do have fairytale books sleeping beauty, Cinderella, Rapunzal ? Sp? but but they've just never taken to them. We must be in the minority then?
I can only speak from having a son, he can't stand Disney films but then he found Frozen, from a personal point of view, whoever came up with that fucking song, I am going to find and kill.

As an aside, tell them the original fairytales

SquirryTheSquirrel · 21/08/2021 16:02

In the minority but I more or less agree with you, OP. Not because princesses are feminine, but because it's all superficial and appearance based - we shouldn't be encouraging this, as society bangs this message home again and again, and it's a damaging one.

I understand the 'modern Disney princesses are strong women' argument, but they're still conventionally attractive with unrealistic Barbie bodies .

MsSquiz · 21/08/2021 16:02

[quote modernlifestrife]@lazylinguist is articulating this much better than I can.

I feel some of this is pushed on girls to like princesses as they are what girls like. [/quote]
So should we tell them that they can't like princesses, as it's stereotypical for girls to like princesses, and make them play with non princess related toys? Hmm

DrSbaitso · 21/08/2021 16:03

@Starjammer

(Off topic, but *@DrSbaitso*, your name has reminded me of many fun hours on my grandpa's computer typing in silly questions to Sr Sbaitso with my best friend Grin I had forgotten all about it)
(Posters who interact with me can decide for themselves whether or not I provide more intelligent conversation 😆 I was surprised the name was available!)
BasicB · 21/08/2021 16:03

A ‘princess’, even Disney ones, aren’t one single entity anyway. Some of the older Disney films show them to be fairly passive but the modern ones definitely aren’t. Tiana wants to run a restaurant - Moana is fiercely independent, as is Merida, and both defy their parents - Elsa has a hard time accepting herself and her powers. And Anna always puts her sister above her fella.

DrSbaitso · 21/08/2021 16:04

@SquirryTheSquirrel

In the minority but I more or less agree with you, OP. Not because princesses are feminine, but because it's all superficial and appearance based - we shouldn't be encouraging this, as society bangs this message home again and again, and it's a damaging one.

I understand the 'modern Disney princesses are strong women' argument, but they're still conventionally attractive with unrealistic Barbie bodies .

Moana is attractive but she doesn't have a Barbie body. She's strong and fit.
WorraLiberty · 21/08/2021 16:04

[quote modernlifestrife]@lazylinguist is articulating this much better than I can.

I feel some of this is pushed on girls to like princesses as they are what girls like. [/quote]
I feel some of this is pushed on girls to like princesses as they are what girls like.

Yes and often pushed on boys too by the sound of some MNetters.

I've lost count of the amount of threads over the years where parents have been beaming with 'pride' that their little boys want to wear princess dresses to school.

Meanwhile, most kids just fall in and out of fads and phases.

SquirryTheSquirrel · 21/08/2021 16:04

Moana is attractive but she doesn't have a Barbie body

She does. Look at the ratio of her head to her waist.

MsSquiz · 21/08/2021 16:05

My SIL has 3 kids: a boy of 9 and twin boy and girl of 5.
If it was just about exposure, my niece should be the biggest tomboy, playing with her older brother's Star Wars toys and marvel action figures.
Whereas she will always choose to wear a dress, rather than trousers, she will choose to play with dolls in a mixed toy setting.

It's not all about exposure

TangoWhiskyAlphaTango · 21/08/2021 16:05

Meh my DD had one when she was around 6. She is now 18 and a politics student who wants to be an MP. She is feisty and does not give a shit what people think about her. It has not scarred her for life.....!

BasicB · 21/08/2021 16:05

The soundtracks of Moana and Frozen 2 are absolutely epic as well - I listen to the Frozen 2 one in the car even when the DC aren’t with me Grin

DrSbaitso · 21/08/2021 16:07

@SquirryTheSquirrel

Moana is attractive but she doesn't have a Barbie body

She does. Look at the ratio of her head to her waist.

She's stylised, yes, like everyone in the film. But she's got calves and she isn't pin thin.
trappistkepler · 21/08/2021 16:07

This is more of the woke shite. It is completely acceptable for girls to like princesses you know OP.

PumpkinPie2016 · 21/08/2021 16:08

YABU it's just a kids party with a character from a story Confused

Kids like all sorts of things. Doesn't mean they will still like them at 18.

I liked lots of girly things as a kid but found my passion in the sciences and ended up reading Physics at University which is quite male dominated.