Asked out by someone considerably richer and educated than I am

[Shariotlion]

Name changed for this.. Regular poster don't want this linked back to my other posts..

I work in a hospital, in an Admin role. I support a very executive person within my trust. Our offices are based quite near to theatre. Every day, I see the same consultant, and we exchange smiles and pleasantries.. Today I was sat for lunch in the staff canteen and I saw him, he walked past and said hello and sat at the table opposite me (we're still socially distanced in hospitals) we chatted for a bit then I got up to leave and he did also.. I walked back to my office then ten minutes later I received an email from him saying he enjoyed our chat and would be nice to go for lunch properly. He must've seen my full name on my ID badge.. He's not my usual type, I'm mid 30s and I'd say he was 50+ he has a full head of white hair and is built..
I've been single about a year and have a young daughter, I'm in no rush for a relationship but also don't want a casual thing.. He's been a consultant for 10 years.. I don't know, I suppose I feel like I have imposter syndrome and what would be the point as we probably don't have much in common and are from completing different backgrounds.. Would it even be worth pursuing???

Do you actually think he’s attractive at all, even if he’s not your usual type?

Did you have a connection? Could there be one? Did you fancy him? I wouldn't worry about the richer / more educated part. I would want to make sure he isn't married.

If you like him or would like to get to know him better why not? It's just lunch. People can have plenty in common despite educational differences. Just see where it leads if you feel attracted to him.

Sorry, meant to add: I’d be really careful about this. I’d like to think he’s genuine and lovely but the fact is the workplace power dynamics are not in your favour, so if he’s not a decent person it could get really tricky for you.

Do you like him? Because that’s the main consideration.

Yes, why shouldn't you? Just because you earn less or have a different education, background or career doesn't make you less worthy, or less of a person. Do it, have fun, be yourself.

is he actually single ?

The only worry I would have is mixing business with pleasure.

Did you enjoy chatting to him? If you did, go for it.

My DP is the most intelligent person I've met. It's just ridiculous the amount of stuff that is in his brain. He remembers everything, knows the answer to all general knowledge questions but he feels that I bring something else to the party that is equally as important - a different perspective, which is just as valid.

Do you fancy him? You could go for lunch and see?

But do tread carefully as I guess he has the power to make your life difficult if it doesn't work out.

If you think he's attractive and as long as he's not married, how can it hurt?

He might earn more than you but it's not like you don't work and it sounds like you have a respectable position.

Nice to date a man with a good job and a bit of money rather than some of the cocklodgers and workshy lazy gits you read about on here.

Do you like him? Fancy him? That’s more important.
For what it’s worth, his background might not be that much different, I worked with a surgeon when I was a scrub nurse who grew up in the post war terraces I did in our scrubby northern town.

If you like him go to lunch, it's no more of a commitment than that at this stage. You make work in the same place but it doesn't sound like you work together and it sounds like you're old enough not to fall for his status. I think working in a hospital soon gives you a different view of consultants anyway.

Do you actually think he’s attractive at all, even if he’s not your usual type?

How’s the ‘usual type’ working out?

Clearly doesn’t

Change tact

Have lunch.

If he was a woman asking you to meet for lunch you wouldn’t think beyond 12-1 for lunch. So go and have a nice time. If you want more lunch - then go again.

Stop the pressure.

You might be surprised by how refreshingly ordinary he is, op?

I have no idea where the '?' came from.

I don’t really understand, Bluebells I only referred to her “usual type” because those were the words the OP used herself. Didn’t mean anything else by it, not sure why you quoted me?

He’s asked you for lunch. How lovely.
Go!!!
He hasn’t asked you to go to a peep show or anything sleazy!!!

Yes that's another thing, I'm not 100 % sure he's not married.. He has no wedding ring but that could be because of his work..
I'm interested to know more about him, he's not unattractive.. He's an attractive older gentleman..
I also worry about the work dynamic also, I see him every morning!

Maybe go for a daytime lunch. That's somehow less pressure than an evening date.

Quite common for consultants to marry beneath them Give him a chance!

Just go for lunch - you have nothing to lose.

I'd find out if he was single first.

Have you Googled him? That will normally give you a clue as to his marital status (Instagram or some such - any of my teenagers would be able to find this out in about 30 seconds). Assuming he's not married, and assuming you enjoyed talking to him, I'd say go for it and see what happens. The worst that can happen is that you spend rather a dull hour with a man you don't fancy, and then get on with your life.

Seems like you're really intimated by him and it won't work.