How to decline a wedding invite

[BabyGohil]

I need help
Been invited to a wedding which is 3 hours away from me, I have a little baby who will be 4 months by then….my husband and baby have not been invited….Im breast feeding and I don’t think I could leave him so far away for that long (I’ve only left him for About and hour or so with grand parents previously).
Thoughts on how to approach this?
I feel like a bad friend but then have anxiety about going and potentially distressing my child as it’s so far away.

@TatianaBis

Don’t send a regret card they’re incredibly naff.

Disagree, as long as its a simple design and not filled with an overwrought apology they are very useful. Nicer than a text.

'No' is a full sentance you dont need to justify it.

If you do justify it dont feel bad - its the height of bad invite ettiquette both to A) not invite partners and B) to invite a travelling guest alone so they where increadibly rude first.

Also your reasons of not wanting to leave a breastfed baby and travel 3 hours is perfectly acceptable, if they truely cared about you being there they obviously would have invited the baby in arms as a mark of common sense.

You don't have to give a reason, Just say thank you for the invite, Unfortunately I will not be able to attend. Hope you have a lovely day.

If you really want to go hire a room at the hotel and leave hubby with the baby - pop up to breast feed. But to be honest since they haven't invited hubby you don't sound close so I would just cancel.

Thoughts on how to approach this?

The way to 'approach' this is to tick the decline box

@Wineandroses3

I think they’ve been pretty cheeky inviting u to a wedding an not a plus one so expecting you to go on your own - and they know you have a very young baby too? Just buy a sorry I cannot make it card that you can get from any card shop and send that. If they get in touch with you after just say baby is too young to be left , I wouldn’t loose a moments sleep over it x

This. Don't worry about not being a good friend.

Whoever said anything about a text!

Wedding regret cards are super naff whatever you write on them.

The template formal refusals I posted above are all you need. They obviate the need for any explanation.

I’m really surprised that posters here don’t know the correct way to reply to formal invitations.

With regret cards are fine. 🤷‍♀️ Quick, easy and to the point. You don’t need templates or anything.

@TatianaBis

I’m really surprised that posters here don’t know the correct way to reply to formal invitations.

It’s a friends wedding not an invite from the Queen

Yes all this replying to a formal invitation stuff. It’s just a wedding. Get down to WH Smith and get the regret card and post it. Job done.

Unfortunately will not be able to attend due to childcare and travel logistics. Wishing you a wonderful day

I voted YABU for being so wet that you had to ask. Just tick the no box - the couple don't care about explanations they just need the numbers

@Sparklingbrook

With regret cards are fine. 🤷‍♀️ Quick, easy and to the point. You don’t need templates or anything.

They’re absolutely cringeworthy no nos.

You don’t need to buy cards, you just need to know the wording.

It’s a friends wedding not an invite from the Queen

Irrelevant. Any formal invitation should be replied to in the same way.

They’re absolutely cringeworthy no nos
They really aren't.

You don’t need to buy cards, you just need to know the wording
The card has all the words in.

@TatianaBis

It’s a friends wedding not an invite from the Queen

Irrelevant. Any formal invitation should be replied to in the same way.

@TatianaBis

It’s a friends wedding not an invite from the Queen

Irrelevant. Any formal invitation should be replied to in the same way.

Wedding invites either include a card to return yes/no or details of where to text or email your RSVP, if you do anything else good for you but you’re way over complicating things, people just want to know who is/isn’t coming

I’m cringing for you, but that’s ok as you’re completely oblivious.

At 4 months old, if your baby can take milk from a bottle they are not really going to notice you're gone in all honesty. And one or two bottles won't mean you're going to stop breastfeeding either.

I'd be more worried that you'll leak everywhere if you can't find a place to express!

Yes @LawnFever they just want to know how many heads for the buffet, they aren't fussed to the hows and whys, it's a YES/NO question-coming or not?

But otherwise just a sorry can't make it will do. They'll have a load of other guests to worry about.

@TatianaBis

I’m cringing for you, but that’s ok as you’re completely oblivious.

And me for you.

I'm not sure snorting is very good etiquette either.

@TatianaBis

I’m cringing for you, but that’s ok as you’re completely oblivious.

If you think you’re being hilarious then shock horror your humour unsurprisingly doesn’t come across in a post, don’t give up the day job

That was to @Sparklingbrook not you @Lawnfever

Never been sent a wedding invite with text or email. But then I’ve never been sent one with gold butterflies or verse either.