Anyone ever had or been to an ‘alternative’ wedding?

[Angelaanaconda10]

Been to 4 in the past 5 years, each one was in a grand stately home/hall type setting, lot of money had clearly been spent. Traditional sit down meal, followed by the first dance, speeches, cutting the cake etc. Long, elegant white dress with a train(trail?)

They were all lovely, clearly very well thought-out and fancy. I hope this doesn’t offend people but it’s not the sort of wedding I would want. I can’t really speak for my partner but I’m not interested in tradition, even in having a white dress. I don’t have the money for such a wedding either and I have zero interest in spending years planning and stressing over every detail like I’ve seen friends do.
I don’t even have enough female close friends I could have as bridesmaids.

Has anyone got stories to share about weddings?

My brother got married on halloween, at dusk on a jetty in the bay of Victoria, Vancouver Island, BC. The bride wore a burgundy velvet dress and cape with flowers in her hair. The priest looked like Gèrard Depardieu. There were about 20 of us and we went out to a restaurant afterwards. Fab wedding.

Also, having what is considered a 'traditional' Church service and sit down meal doesn't have to be extortionate.
I got married in the Church I attend, and everyone was pleased to be involved - ours isn't a 'pretty' or historic Church so only weddings there tend to be people involved in the Church so it is lovely to help out at weddings - minister, organist, choir, flower arranging etc all lovingly done by friends from the Church.

Friend who had quite a nice car drove my Mum and bridesmaids to the Church then turned round and came and picked up me and my Dad. We had a sit down meal but it was at a local social club which had a good reputation for it's food / catering and didn't quadruple the price for a wedding. DJ was a friend who did it for a wedding present. Cake also made by the parent of someone I'd been a youth Leader for, for some years, and she wanted to do it, at cost, saying it was a thank you for all the years of volunteering I'd done. Dress was made by a friend, again didn't want to take anything other than costs (we did insist on giving her something). Though these days I think I would by an 'off the peg' non-traditional wedding dress. Friend of my Dad's printed the invitations and order of service (thought I wouldn't bother with order of service if doing it again, now). The only real expenses were the meal and the photographer - although we only had him from 30mins before the ceremony (ie at the Church) until we got to the venue and posed 'cutting the cake' for him, not for the hours and hours some weddings seem to book people for now. Everyone did their own make up and hair if they chose, or sorted their own hair cuts with their own hairdressers so they were comfortable with how they looked.

@DelphiniumTea

Second wedding for both of us, we were quite young though, 26 and 28. Booked the register office and invited a couple of friends as witnesses. My parents, who knew all about it, decided at the very last minute to travel down 400 miles to be here. The in-laws got wind of that and travelled 200 miles up to be here. One of husband's siblings got wind of it also, and decided to come too. So then there were nine.

Spent the wedding eve trying to book a restaurant for nine people, for after the ceremony, and also picking relatives up from the station and finding places for them to sleep. It sounds very stressful, but it really wasn't. It was really warming and lovely that they decided they didn't want to miss the occasion. It added to the joy!

A month later, a pregnancy test came up positive. "So just in time!" my mother was totally impressed by our alacrity. I was probs about 4 weeks gone when we married, but in fairness, I hadn't known it at the time. We didn't marry 'because' I was pregnant. I just didn't know I was "with child" when we got married.

I'm seriously not arsed that we did't have a big "do". It's the marriage that's important. Not the wedding. I know dozens of folks who had a massive expensive wedding, who are now divorced.

You know quite a lot of people who spend a lot on weddings but end up divorced...didn't you say it was your second wedding?