AIBU to think the teenage years are going to be hard?

[Pinkwithwhite]

We have 2 children, I want 3 at least but reading another thread and someone made a comment about how easy the baby/toddler stage is compared to the teenage years.
I've never thought about having 3 teenagers!
Please what is it like? How hard is it? No one has never said anything about the teenage years, and when I think what we were like as teens I think how on earth will we cope?!

What I find harder about the teenage years is I can’t solve all of their problems. The issues they have are more serious now. We’ve parented both exactly the same but our youngest is having far more complex issues during their teens than the older one did.

I do think that a lot is down to luck. My brother and I were parented the same but from pre-teens we’re hugely different. For example I never smoked, drank or took drugs. My brother however did anything and everything from about age 13, including illegal activity.

Another massive thumbs up for the teenage years - my girls were brilliant people to share my life with - I really enjoyed seeing them grow from being dependent children into independent young adults. I think it’s important to prepare the way so as @newnortherner111 said setting your expectations for behaviour is important but I’d say you need to work on communication so you and your kids can be open and honest about things - it’s so important to build trust and to let them know you will support them and that it’s okay to make mistakes. As a parent you also have to grow and adapt during this time and be prepared to admit your mistakes and apologise when needed - you can’t carry on treating them like little kids - If you have a good relationship with them they will bring so much fun and joy into your life and it feels good to be there when they turn to you when they are feeling upset or down. One other thing I found important to do was to give them privacy because this is something I never had - my father always wanted to know too much - I really resented that. All the things I was worried about were things I brought up in conversation with them. The teenage years were great.

My dS is almost 13 and he is a delight but I am find myself worry far more than I ever did now he is at secondary - cannot explain why