Locked Parking Thread - The Actual End

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

This has been a wild ride made substantially more entertaining by DBs shenanigans but the end is in sight.

Hopefully by 8.35 the car will be free. I will be downing something alcoholic and next time the straw comes I'll make him bring it in by hand one bale at a time WITHOUT unlocking the gate!

I'm going to go for dignified and just let him out and convince myself that him moving it at all makes this a draw my victory. He no doubt will do the same and we'll both potter off happily into the sunset hopefully never to meet again!

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* Edited by MNHQ to add *

Previous threads all here:

To lock the jackass in (parking thread)
Locked parking thread 2
Locked Parking Thread 3(!!!))
Locked parking thread 4 - The End
Locked Parking Thread 5 - The Actual End

Shit I did forget Y

Yoghurt licker!

At this rate OP will have to start a new thread just to update us as we will have filled it up

@DrBlackbird

We all would desperately love for the OP to turn her lights out and lock the front door in a petty one upmanship (upwomanship) and get the bloody truck towed tomorrow as we are massively rooting for this wanker to be taught a lesson.

The reality is that this wearing for her and she’d like to be shot of the twat. So unlocking the gate in a somewhat anticlimactic manner is the most likely - and best for the OP - outcome.

And we’ve all had our fun this weekend

This. And, in her shoes, I'd silently fume but open the gate. Because I would be scared about confronting this arrogant cockwomble. Sad, but true.

No this guy is a loser. He wanted the gates to be left open so he could slink away non confrontational.

OP goes to bed at 10.00 whatever happens (I'm too invested 🙈)

I'll put into the whip round for the tow truck too.

But maybe he's there now and it's taking so long because @BlueEyesWhiteDragon is waiting on the magic word.....

What post number are we on now?

It's so bloody rude.
Everyone knows that farms run from dawn til dusk.

785

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

Why on earth are people offering money? It’s not the fucking theatre. Some people on here seriously need to calm down and breathe.

It's for in case a tow truck is needed - it seems very unfair for OP to have to bear the whole cost herself when loads of us on here could crowdfund it. It's the least we can do. It's not money being offered in return for the entertainment, as if OP were a virtual performing seal.

Really? Ffs.

785

He's so fucking rude!!!!

Placemarking as fuck

@SunShinesBrightly

What post number are we on now?

787

I think he turned up but his car engine has seized up...and OP and her DB is giving him a push! 😀

Really? Ffs.

?????? Have you not been reading the thread?

@ablutiions

I bet he has a punchable face. Wanker.

And kickable bollocks to go with it.

@Firstbornunicorn

I just hope the OP is ok. She said she’s not a big woman and the guy might be the kind to throw his weight around.

I think op has said her husband and 2 sons live with her so she's not in the house alone at least

@Yesitsbess

I have so much secondhand rage right now. This is worse than when I had to hold a tree surgeon hostage and shout at 3 other angry tree surgeons over a gate whilst waving a glass of wine in a menacing fashion until they handed over a large sum of cash they owed me.

My daughter maintains it's probably the coolest thing I've ever done.

We need the full story!!

I've got a real sense of fear that this will be another barbour coat thread. Please prove me wrong OP!

Now - seriously - if the OP is afraid, she needs to get the cops involved and they will give him a prick shrinking talking to about his illegal dumping of Ranger on private property

It's gone. I am disappointed in myself. In the universe. But I am seething at him. Fucking seething.

He messaged to say I'm here. I didn't reply. Few minutes later the doorbell goes. Round 1 to me. Except it isn't because its a fucking woman at the door. He's sent his DP. She rings again. So I answer because goddammit she's just standing there.
DP - Hi im here to collect the Ranger for DP. You've been messaging him about it? I'm sorry about the inconvenience we appreciate you taking care of it.
Me - 100 million snotty responses run though my head but fuck she looks horrified so I say. "It's not YOUR fault. Hes lucky noones needed to get through. 2 secs. Let me just grab the keys.
DP - Thanks. I am really sorry about the inconvenience. Hes lucky he could get it safely on your land. The battery has been nothing but hassle. Hes needs to swap it for something more reliable but it's his pride and joy.
Me - splutter splutter. What? He said it broke down.
At this point we walking towards to gate and I am gearing myself up to make a snotty comment directly to the idiot. He sees us. Winds the window down and says to his DP "see you around 11" to me he says. OK now? And drives off. Fucking drives off.

I swear his DP can see the steam coming out my ears. I'm genuinely incoherent. I stamped my foot and literally screamed are you fucking joking me. She apologies more. Says he can be a bit self absorbed sometimes. Asks me my favourite wine and she'll drop some off. I tell her forget it. Apologise to her for losing my temper. Irs not her I'm mad at.

She gets in the truck and has hastily driven off. I must look deranged and now he's won. Im the crazy one.

I'm just. Fuck.

@LittleBear21 and the magic word is Yugioh! 😂😂😂

I've just read through all five threads... It's very sad but I'm totally invested now!

I hope he's turned up and you've just ignored him, OP! TOW THE FUCKER

@DobbyTheHouseElk

OP has posted on FB, messaged this twat and yet nothing. I think the car is yours now OP.

Hang on, who are you?

(please say hot brother)