Locked Parking Thread - The Actual End

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

This has been a wild ride made substantially more entertaining by DBs shenanigans but the end is in sight.

Hopefully by 8.35 the car will be free. I will be downing something alcoholic and next time the straw comes I'll make him bring it in by hand one bale at a time WITHOUT unlocking the gate!

I'm going to go for dignified and just let him out and convince myself that him moving it at all makes this a draw my victory. He no doubt will do the same and we'll both potter off happily into the sunset hopefully never to meet again!

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* Edited by MNHQ to add *

Previous threads all here:

To lock the jackass in (parking thread)
Locked parking thread 2
Locked Parking Thread 3(!!!))
Locked parking thread 4 - The End
Locked Parking Thread 5 - The Actual End

@BasicDad

Tow it to an unknown destination and geo cache about 50 clues to get to it.

He's clearly a thick twat, so even one clue would be too much for him.

Even if that clue was a grid reference.

Thanks @LakieLady

Wouldn't it be a terrible awful if there was dog poo under his door handle

Can’t believe the brass neck of him!

I don’t think he will turn up at 4.55, he really doesn’t believe OP is serious about getting it towed

I am a bit at a loss. Tbh I should have just agreed 9pm. Don't know why I thought he'd go with a time I suggested. You can't reasonable with stupid unreasonable.

I really don't want it drag on. Its not in the way, but it is in the way if you know what I mean? But goddammit this has all been on his terms and I'm ...... irate. If I was emailing him I'd be signing off Regards. There would be no Kind!

Followed this from the beginning. I can’t believe it’s still ongoing - but secretly enjoying it. Sorry, OP, I know it’s not enjoyable for you.

But what’s a Ranger? I’m not in the UK and have been there in several years do maybe I’m out of touch. Here in the US we have Ford Rangers which are small pick-up trucks, usually driven by old men who live in the country. Is it one of those?

Possibly been said but in my defence I'm alone with a 2 year old and baby and am trying my BEST to keep up,

Perhaps his wife, partner, sister, is on here and it's now game on.....

If he isn't there yet I'd be locking the gates and going to bed.
And get the tow truck rearranged for the morning,

Still not here then BlueEyes? Off to bed with you!

I would text "You haven't turned up so I am continuing with the evening plans that I delayed by 30 mins in order to accommodate you. If you turn up anytime between now and 9.30 I might be able to open the gate for you but you will probably have to wait a while for me to find a convenient stopping point."

Then when he turns up and texts make him wait for 20 mins. Go out, briskly and silently open the gate. If he says anything, say you haven't got time for chit chat and to get his arse in gear.

@BlueEyesWhiteDragon

I am a bit at a loss. Tbh I should have just agreed 9pm. Don't know why I thought he'd go with a time I suggested. You can't reasonable with stupid unreasonable.

I really don't want it drag on. Its not in the way, but it is in the way if you know what I mean? But goddammit this has all been on his terms and I'm ...... irate. If I was emailing him I'd be signing off Regards. There would be no Kind!

He’s a knob! Arrange the tow truck!

Tow it, tow it, tow it, tow it!

OP please go and have another Carvery, be out, don’t take his poor manners, don’t be available LEAVE NOW!

(We’ll have a wip-round to pay for it!!)

What an absolute git. Another vote for getting it towed tomorrow.

No surprise he playing silly beggers! Again.

Can you put a report onto 'rate my driver' horrible website but also so useful

OP he is totally fucking with you on purpose. Don’t let him win. He’s lost his window. It’s tow time now.

Go to bed and turn your phone off

It would be a shame if the dogs weren’t securely in the house (!)

You need to stick to your guns OP, don't go and meet him now, you said 8.30 at the latest, hes not bothered with that, so just leave his car there tonight and get it towed tomorrow.

Oooh crikey, is this live, so to speak? I've no idea where in the UK BlueEyes is and I can't tell by the posting times - it's 7.50am Wednesday here in New Zealand.

Yes Britwife, a Ford Ranger in this case driven by a prick.

He is taking the absolute piss now, he really is.
I would actually stop communicating with him at all. Just get the car towed off your land and let him be someone else’s problem.

@BritWifeInUSA

Followed this from the beginning. I can’t believe it’s still ongoing - but secretly enjoying it. Sorry, OP, I know it’s not enjoyable for you.

But what’s a Ranger? I’m not in the UK and have been there in several years do maybe I’m out of touch. Here in the US we have Ford Rangers which are small pick-up trucks, usually driven by old men who live in the country. Is it one of those?

Yes it's a Ford Ranger

I wonder if this idiot manages dr appointments or just wanders in and expects that place will revolve around his whims too?

Stuff it OP. You've already done far, far more than most people would have done. He's been a complete dick from start to finish.

Text: bored now. Tow company will be in contact, bills will be to you.

@BritWifeInUSA it’s one of those. Probably white. Driven by dickheads with small willies.

I would send him one last text then saying "do not come here again you are too late. You will have to deal with the tow company tomorrow - unless FC have intervened in the meantime. I am blocking you now. Arsehole."