How long did it take for you to be on 'farting' terms with your DPs

[fuckyeahpercywigwam]

This is not really an AIBU, but inspired by the hilarious 'he shat in the garden' thread.

My friend's daughter has been married for seven years...child-free..but her and her DH have never farted in each other's hearing. Nope. They discreetly remove themselves to the loo.

I cannot believe this.

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

some of the comments are just... 🤣 there are a lot of prudes and uptight butt clenchers here.

Amen! I don't think I know anyone in real life that thinks a totally normal bodily function is purposely disrespectful 😂

That’s pretty weird. Associating farting with sex.
As for respectless! Not a word. Maybe disrespectful is what you mean. Nonetheless…I feel sorry for you way of thinking.

From early on thankfully, he was tickling me and I began to fart uncontrollably, it was v.embarrassing at the time but I'm glad we got that out of the way, I'd have stomach pain having to hold it in all the time and I'm very windy in pregnancy. I don't fart in front of anyone else though unless I really must!

@Inastatus

Been with DH for 24 years, married for 21 and we don’t fart in front of each other. I really don’t get how people find it so amusing/entertaining.

Just because some couples will fart in front of each other, doesn’t mean they find it amusing or entertaining? . We do, but we don’t find it funny as we are not five year olds.

Snarts are a real thing also and there's no holding them in
I don't believe half the people on this thread saying they never fart infront of their partners

20 years together and we don't

I guess it's a good compatibility test.

That, attitudes to punctuality, similar ideas on where you want to live and how involved with family of origin you prefer to be, relatively similar tastes in food so you can cook one meal and eat together, similar ideas on whether you want children and/ or pets or not, and if all that works out see whether you can spend a two week holiday together without getting bored of one another - compatibility on those things and the relationship might last...

SchrodingersImmigrant thanks for that everyone's farts smell unpleasant most of the time.

About 6 months after moving in together for me, he farted from day one. But I don’t do it on purpose one may slip out otherwise I wait till he’s not near me he has no boundaries but I’ll still run the gap and shut the door for anything other than a pee

@Greenrubber

Snarts are a real thing also and there's no holding them in I don't believe half the people on this thread saying they never fart infront of their partners

I wonder if people mean audible farts only and don't count quiet "shhhhhhh" ones😂

@grealy

Guess I live in a gross house regularly and from early on.

Same here

In my relationship before my DH I never dreamed of it! But I like that me and DH are comfortable around each other. We still bloody moan when either one has farted though 🤣

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme

SchrodingersImmigrant thanks for that everyone's farts smell unpleasant most of the time.

Not enough to make the whole room smell. Farts shouldn't smell that strong🤷🏻 Sometimes there is even basically no smell.

Unles you eat a jar of live sauerkraut while stress eating or something that was a memorable day

@schrodingersImmigrant

Probably yes! And blame the dog for any smelly ones

[quote Greenrubber]@schrodingersImmigrant

Probably yes! And blame the dog for any smelly ones[/quote]
😂 I don't have a dog unfortunately so if it happens while gardening (bending over wtc) I have to loudly blame it on DH. Neigbours must be pissing themselves laughing sometimes 😂

Someone please send a link to the "He shat in the garden" post, I'm intrigued....

never done and and never would unless a totally uncontrollable accident which I couldn't have left the room to do .. disgusting habit and I'd lose any sexual attraction for someone that did it in front of me on purpose

@loadofcrap10

Someone please send a link to the "He shat in the garden" post, I'm intrigued....

Here ya go www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3984283-To-s-t-in-the-garden

I wonder if farting a lot is diet related. DH and I are both vegetarians (and have been for 16 years so most of our time together).
I don’t particularly like when he starts talking to me if I’m on the loo but I’m past the notion that it’s grim.
I mean, if one were on holiday where there are big pits you’ve got to hold onto a rope and lower yourself into, in public, or camping or at the beach and get caught short….
I also have IBS. Not sure what DH’s excuse is though 😳.
More seriously, a lot of fibre or vegetables of a certain kind can really start it off.
It’s definitely not funny but it’s hardly embarrassing of the “my neighbour saw me shitting in the garden” for instance (they didn’t because I don’t but if I did, someone would).
I’ve also shat my pants on the way for a train to work which was the most horrible thing that happened in terms of embarrassing things. I was walking through a park and all of a sudden I had pain that I couldn’t breathe through.
I stopped walking because I couldn’t and got my phone out because I felt like I was having a heart attack. But it was just nature’s way of mortifying me

@Aprilx - I wasn’t implying that all couples find it amusing! I was simply expressing how I don’t get how some people do. Is that hard to understand? I have friends who think it is the most hilarious thing ever do there are people out there who think this way. As I say, each to their own but I don’t get it.

@MrsPsmalls
Could you eat some Jerusalem artichoke and report back.
I try to do it silently.

3 years later and I have never once heard DP fart. He even plays music or runs the shower to cover up the sound when he does a poo 😂 He is a massive prude though.
He’s heard me fart once when I thought it was going to be a silent one and wasn’t

After 30 years together I would never fart in his company (purposely anyway, during the night I'm sure it happens). He never does it in my company either, while awake

@Blue4YOU

I wonder if farting a lot is diet related. DH and I are both vegetarians (and have been for 16 years so most of our time together). I don’t particularly like when he starts talking to me if I’m on the loo but I’m past the notion that it’s grim. I mean, if one were on holiday where there are big pits you’ve got to hold onto a rope and lower yourself into, in public, or camping or at the beach and get caught short…. I also have IBS. Not sure what DH’s excuse is though 😳. More seriously, a lot of fibre or vegetables of a certain kind can really start it off. It’s definitely not funny but it’s hardly embarrassing of the “my neighbour saw me shitting in the garden” for instance (they didn’t because I don’t but if I did, someone would). I’ve also shat my pants on the way for a train to work which was the most horrible thing that happened in terms of embarrassing things. I was walking through a park and all of a sudden I had pain that I couldn’t breathe through. I stopped walking because I couldn’t and got my phone out because I felt like I was having a heart attack. But it was just nature’s way of mortifying me

Awww that's horrible! I was very close few times when in town. I nearly cried. Luckily my digestive is now back to being able to handle everything but that few years were horrible so I absolutely feel for you.

We do, we also cough, sneeze, burp, hiccup etc in front of each other. These are normal bodily functions and nothing to be embarrassed (or proud) about.

Those who don't what happens on long car journeys? Do you pull in at every service station or hold it in for hours?

We only fart in front of each other by accident. Not as a regular thing.