to let my 14 year old

[WeMarchOn]

My 14 year old daughter wants her nose pierced, aibu to let her?
Fully prepared to be flamed here 🥴

@Aquamarine1029

No. She can do that when she turns 18 if she still wants to.

Actually 16. For a piercing

14 is too young. And I’m a relaxed mum. Mine got hers pierced at 16. I took her to a reputable place.
14 is a ridiculous age to get facial piercings

Jesus, i had my tongue pierced at nearly 15.🙈 i think its fine for the nose, they heal quite quickly if cared for properly and make sure its done with a needle! I have a very thin small silver ring in mine and i love it. I didn't have the stud when i had it pierced just a larger ring to allow for swelling.

My mum hit the roof when I had my nose pierced at 15! Then she took my daughter to get hers done at the same age! 😂 She has obviously mellowed a lot!
Ignore the posters who say it looks skanky and cheap, there is a bit of a Hyacinth Bouquet about people who use language like that!

If you bring her to a reputable parlour and she is prepared to be told that they won't pierce her due to her age and if they do there is a lot of aftercare then I can't see a problem. My two girls had their noses pierced at 15. They had no problems. I would far prefer piercings to tattoos. You know yourself what type of girl she is and she maybe trying to find her own individuality or she could be following her friends. For school we had the little flesh coloured round plasters

Tell her she can have it done when she no longer needs you to give permission.

I thought it wasn't legal to get that sort of piercing until age 16? Im trying to remember what happened with DD, I don't think a "reputable" place would do it iirc

Go for it, mine has one and she looks gorgeous and so will yours.

I don't think 14 is necessarily too young, I know some 14 yos who act like they're still 9yo, and some who are going on 24 (maturity wise). How'd she'd react to requests to remove it, like school or future employer (can be h&s issue) would be a good indication.

That said, if the request was a bit out of the blue, I'd probably say something like, as it's a mostly permanent body modification, if you still want it at Xmas/next summer, we'll get it done then.

And I'd expect her to have researched aftercare, things that can go wrong, and found a reputable piercer (that I agree with).

Is your mum vaguely religious? IIRC nose piercings are mentioned in the bible as a symbol of wealth and status

I have multiple piercings, I think I was up to 5 before I turned 15 - even after I'd convinced them not to say "no", my parents made me wait 18 months for anything other than the basic ear piercings, but after that they fully supported me and joked that I was easy regarding birthdays/Xmas, as I either wanted another piercing, or later on, a tattoo

I hate septum piercings personally though, I know about their history, but as someone who has allergies all year round, it just makes me shudder

I wouldn’t let her. I’ve had mine pierced for 30 years. I’ll never be able to leave the stud out now as the hold is big. I like the stud but i woukd t have it done again.

[quote WeMarchOn]@OdetoMyFamily are you bored tonight? Are you ok hun? [/quote]
What are you going on about? You asked a question in AIBU. I responded. You not familiar with how AIBU works? Hun.

I'd be fine with that but I'd want to know about school first, would she have to take it out all day?

@OdetoMyFamily she didn't ask for shitty judgements. Or did I miss that in the op? She asked if 14 was too young to let her. Maybe zip it when it feels like bile is going to gush out

@OdetoMyFamily I'm being sarcastic!

Thank you so much for the helpful replies, I'm still not 💯 ok with her having it done (hence why i asked)
Saying it's skanky is way too far imo!

Let her.

Get a flesh coloured retainer because as someone else said noses heal up very easily.

I wouldn't because I got mine done at 17 and it never really worked, I have thick nose cartilage so could never find a stud that would go through properly and it ended up being painful. I'm left with a hole which is easy to fill with porefessional but it's annoying to have to do.

I wouldn't at 14. They can consent themselves at 16, can't they? My dd never asked if she could have a nose piercing, just assumed we'd say no for some reason and said she would do it at 16. (I encouraged her to have her ears pierced when younger but one got infected and closed up, so she now doesn't wear earrings)

Anyway she's been 16 for a few months now and no sign of a nose piercing. Now it's all about hair colour. They change their minds about things regularly at this age and like to follow the latest trend amongst their friends. Maybe just put it off?

I don't think any of Dd's friends have nose piercings but all have experimented with hair colouring lately.

Maybe wait til they're 16. To me 14 feels a bit young.

I had mine done at 18 once I'd left school.

The rules at school were quite strict.
You could have your ears pierced - one stud only in each ear.
It was recommended they were removed before sports however if your child kept them in & got hurt, it was at their own risk.
Any facial piercings were not allowed & would have to be removed for school.

Far too much hassle & getting the nose piercing just after I did my A levels felt good especially as I didn't have to faff around removing it all the time.

In response to a pp, it's perfectly legal to get a nose piercing done at a reputable piercers with parental consent.
Really you need to give a nose piercing around 2 months to heal, so it might not, ideally, be swapped out for a retainer before school starts again. That's the tricky part of all this - bother from school.
I have no idea why schools are so strict about piercings personally.
There's nothing skanky about nose piercings. They're absolutely beautiful.

14 too young, 16 if she still wants one

At 14, absolutely not. I would also be wary of anyone who would actually agree to pierce her nose at that age. 16 is absolute minimum for me, and even then I'd say don't. Looks incredibly tacky.

Would be a no from me at that age. I like to think I'm more relaxed than my parents but I think facial piercings look a bit downmarket if I'm being honest. I'd also be worried about a permanent hole.

Thing is, people have their own reasons for saying no.

For some it’s the aftercare needed etc but for others it’s the fact that they look chavvy which would mean they would likely say no.

Personally I don’t like any kind of piercings apart from ears, people with multiple piercings certainly don’t look beautiful, in fact the more piercings you have the rougher I would think you are. Ditto tattoo’s.

So for me it would be a hard no until they can A, do so without my consent, and B, afford to pay for it themselves.

Yeah why not, life's short. Years ahead to have to bloody conform