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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kids don't need a hot afternoon meal in this weather. AIBU?

191 replies

MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 17:36

DSC are here for tea after school. I have two little ones of my own here too.

I have heat exhaustion and the place is a furnace which I've been trying to cool down all day. It's an open plan living/dining/kitchen area so no escaping the heat from cooking unless you sod off into a bedroom.

OH insists we must make a hot meal, well multiple meals as they won't all eat the same thing.

I think sandwiches, crisps, sausage rolls etc would suffice just this once - DSC have had a hot meal at school so aren't going to be malnourished.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Whaddayahear · 21/07/2021 20:05

I've been to parts of the US and NZ when it's been over 35c, 39c at one point, and it was much nicer than this horrible muggy stuffy uk heat.

London at 28c is hideous and unbearable.

NZ at 34c is glorious and hot and wonderful.

It's a completely different type of heat. I've spent time in Louisiana in the summer and this is similar to that; a swampy moist airless heat.

LagneyandCasey · 21/07/2021 20:07

Op, an air fryer is wonderful for freezer food like fish fingers, nuggets, chips etc. It gets hot but not as bad as an oven and cools down more quickly. The food cooks faster too.

BoredZelda · 21/07/2021 20:08

This is weird! Why does he ‘insist’ on 2 hot meals every day?! Does he have any other oddities op?

Maybe because the reverse of this post is “DC came home from EX’s today and they said he gave them sandwiches for dinner, AIBU to say this isn’t a proper meal for children”

damndorothea · 21/07/2021 20:09

@LagneyandCasey

Op, an air fryer is wonderful for freezer food like fish fingers, nuggets, chips etc. It gets hot but not as bad as an oven and cools down more quickly. The food cooks faster too.

I second this! I bloody love my air fryer.

Freetodowhatiwant · 21/07/2021 20:20

The kids had a Subway each and I had a bowl of cereal. This is one great thing about being a single parent - being able to make your own decisions about what you want to eat! I know some couples do eat separately of course but I also know of other friends whose DHs will make gourmet meals every night and it all gets a bit much. Ungrateful as that might sound.

Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:22

Maybe because the reverse of this post is “DC came home from EX’s today and they said he gave them sandwiches for dinner, AIBU to say this isn’t a proper meal for children”

It's possible he'd worry about her saying something like that, but I really don't think she would. Eldest SC said his mum often serves cold food when it's hot.

Unless she has form for making passive aggressive digs that he hasn't told me about, she doesn't seem that petty.

OP posts:
Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:23

Noted about an air fryer Smile

OP posts:
allthegoodusernameshavegone · 21/07/2021 20:27

Definitely do what suits you, but heat aside Do you really cook multiple meals to suit everyone?

chaosrabbitland · 21/07/2021 20:28

i think what you had planned is fine , its so bloody hot i cant face cooking either , the fans are only cooling me as long as im sat in front of them ,and i really sympathise with feeling ill with the heat , esp pregnant as you are , it started to get to me sunday , mon i felt awful and yesterday was spent horizontal as i felt so ill with it , head was banging . id be letting him cook and staying out of the way of it . he needs to be more considerate to you ,
all i cooked last night was bacon for dd as she didnt feel well with it either and i had scrambled eggs , thats all we could face and it avoided the oven being on . i hope you feel better soon xx

mbosnz · 21/07/2021 20:30

Also, there's nothing wrong with a rotisserie chicken, some potato salad, a bagged salad, some bread and butter, and fruit and ice-cream - it covers all the food groups!

AddressLabel · 21/07/2021 20:37

I couldn’t be arsed cooking today so mine just had oven chips and hot dogs 🤷‍♀️. I would have made sandwiches but toddler refuses to eat them. Deffo too hot for a proper cooked meal

Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:39

@Freetodowhatiwant

The kids had a Subway each and I had a bowl of cereal. This is one great thing about being a single parent - being able to make your own decisions about what you want to eat! I know some couples do eat separately of course but I also know of other friends whose DHs will make gourmet meals every night and it all gets a bit much. Ungrateful as that might sound.
I can imagine! One of the things I miss most about being on my own is not having the dreaded "what do you want for dinner" exchange every (other) day.

Ahh.. those were the days.

OP posts:
Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:42

@allthegoodusernameshavegone

Definitely do what suits you, but heat aside Do you really cook multiple meals to suit everyone?
Unfortunately yes, one of my DC has autism and just wouldn't eat %90 of what we would like to eat, similarly we can't survive on fish fingers and chips.

What tends to happen is DS eats first and then we have whatever we're having afterwards.

All of that faff can be avoided when the weather is like this though as fortunately he has more 'safe' cold foods than hot.

OP posts:
PommieCheeks75 · 21/07/2021 20:44

He is being silly, as long as a meal is balanced it can be hot or cold.
He could always bbq if he’s dead set on hot food.

PommieCheeks75 · 21/07/2021 20:46

We had quiche and bagged salad of that helps...

Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:46

He has accepted it's not practical to cook again this evening so he's having a cold meal, hurrah it's a shame he didn't see that earlier

OP posts:
mbosnz · 21/07/2021 20:46

You could always give the old fashioned 'take it' or 'leave it', as the two options. My philosophy was I got the choice what to put in front of the tube. They got the choice as to what got put down the tube. If they refused any and all offerings, then there was always a piece of bread and butter, a piece of fruit, a glass of milk, and an early bedtime, because obviously they'd be tired. . .

mbosnz · 21/07/2021 20:48

Sorry, didn't see about the autism! Whole more exhausting and different bag of tricks!

Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:49

@mbosnz

You could always give the old fashioned 'take it' or 'leave it', as the two options. My philosophy was I got the choice what to put in front of the tube. They got the choice as to what got put down the tube. If they refused any and all offerings, then there was always a piece of bread and butter, a piece of fruit, a glass of milk, and an early bedtime, because obviously they'd be tired. . .
I love that, though I'm not sure that would go down well with DSC as they'd lump it and it would end up in the bin Blush
OP posts:
Original poster
MeltingFlamenco · 21/07/2021 20:50

@mbosnz

Sorry, didn't see about the autism! Whole more exhausting and different bag of tricks!
Ha yes indeed, though I'm so used to DS' palate (or lack there of) he's an easy customer as I always have his safe foods in the house, hot and cold.
OP posts:
hedgehogger1 · 21/07/2021 20:57

Tell him you want takeaway?

picklemewalnuts · 21/07/2021 20:59

Instant noodles are good for people who need hot food.
I have two spectrumy folk, one must have a cheese sandwich for lunch unless he's on holiday. He goes into a decline if we run out of the half a tomato, and peanut butter need for the two (slightly different) cheese sandwiches. The other must have hot food. He's generally happy with leftovers, or couscous or instant noodles.
My 'NT' son has developed a love for beige food and has an unhealthy relationship with the air fryer.

Lockdown lunches have been trying.

Confusedandshaken · 21/07/2021 21:03

I haven't turned the hob or oven on since last Friday and I won't be starting anytime soon. Sandwiches and salad will do me until this heat passes. Maybe a takeaway or two.

DH doesn't feel the heat (or the cold) so he is still heating his preferred Charlie Bigham meals in the mini oven.

EKGEMS · 21/07/2021 21:03

It's 85 degrees Fahrenheit and real feel is 97 with humidity factored in here,however vast majority of the homes here have air conditioning-I try not to overuse oven and use my instant pot which is multifunctional and my air fryer or stove. I do not blame any of you not wanting a hot meal. Push fluids and take cool showers and sit in front of a fan. I've had heat exhaustion three times and it's just awful

Mamanyt · 21/07/2021 21:05

OH, also, @MeltingFlamenco, wipe the nape of your neck and your wrists with rubbing alcohol. Yes, it does dry the skin, but the rapid evaporation is wonderfully cooling! I carry little packets of alcohol wipes with me all summer long, as I am very heat-sensitive. They can do marvels in a very short time. And I live in a hot, humid climate in summer, coastal North Carolina.