To think my neighbour is wrong to play music in the garden?

[InTheNameOfAllThatIsHonest]

I work from home (always, not just a few days a week or because of Covid) and my office opens onto my garden. The section of garden it opens onto is about three metres or so from the boundary fence that separates our garden from our neighbours'.

This neighbour (who we don't have the best relationship with for a number of reasons - but I should say he's attended anger management courses in the past and other neighbours warned us about him in the past) built some kind of permanent gazebo attached to the fence (which also takes light away from our living room but it's been there for longer than we could now report it so it's there to stay) and given they are a retired couple, they spend most of their days sitting there, smoking and playing music. When their grandchildren come over to use the temporary pool, it's constant shrieking (and throwing stuff into our garden!).

We usually don't say anything but today they have started playing some sort of techno music so loud that the people on my conf calls can hear it through my laptop microphone (I have the door open because of the heat).

I tried to call out 'hello? hello?' in a 'friendly voice' but nobody answered. So they either left the music going and left the garden, or just don't care at all. I am getting more and more annoyed at the fact that I might end up having to close the door because of their music, especially in this heat.

AIBU to think they should be more considerate? That when they built that structure attached to the boundary fence they should have realised they couldn't use it as if it where further from our garden?

And, more importantly, how can I get them to stop playing loud music? Thank you!

YANBU. No one needs to play music in their garden on a regular basis and they should use headphones. It doesn’t matter if you’re working from home or not. Your neighbour is an inconsiderate twat.

you have a few options you can do but you don't seem to want to?
The bottom line you cannot control what others do. So you have to find your own solution to the problem. Close the doors, put headphones on when your'e on a call, play some music, move to another room. why cant you set up a work space in your living room?
I wfh and have to do all of these and be creative at times depending on what is going on in my house, and also in the street I live. I cant tell the children next door to be quiet. I cant tell the neighbours behind me to turn their music off. I cant tell the lady across the road to stop shouting across to the other neighbour. Everyone is out today enjoying the sun and no one cares that I am wfh. This is a residential area not a office block and I just have to make the best of it.
So I end up with a noise cancelling headset all day & somedays I have to move into a different room.
Like I say I live in a residential area as do you, not an office block. People play music, children scream and dogs bark, that is my problem working from home not theirs so I have to be creative sometimes how to make this work.

@Dentistlakes

YANBU. No one needs to play music in their garden on a regular basis and they should use headphones. It doesn’t matter if you’re working from home or not. Your neighbour is an inconsiderate twat.

yea the neighbour probably is inconsiderate tbh. But given they have alleged anger issues it doesnt sound like they are going to be receptive or care too much about the op wfh needs

I have noise cancelling headphones. How anyone can have conferences using a laptop mic is beyond me!

@stillcrazyafterall I have a separate camera and mike because I present on video calls and needed better quality, so I'm not using my laptop for that. And yet my separate mike still picks up the neighbour's music because it's so loud.

Something's changed because no-one played music in their gardens growing up. It's not that those of us who don't like to hear other people's music wouldn't enjoy listening to our own outside, we just know it's selfish and inconsiderate! No-one wants to hear it but you! YOU put the headphones on, just as we do when we want to listen to some. I despair at how entitled so many people are.

They've started singing along now

Hahaha, I can just imagine these old age pensioners singing along to techno.

Sorry OP, it must be very annoying but frankly there is nothing you can do or say to stop them, so the best thing is to make whatever adjustments required

@Caesargeezer

Something's changed because no-one played music in their gardens growing up. It's not that those of us who don't like to hear other people's music wouldn't enjoy listening to our own outside, we just know it's selfish and inconsiderate! No-one wants to hear it but you! YOU put the headphones on, just as we do when we want to listen to some. I despair at how entitled so many people are.

in an ideal world yes. But, the world is full of inconsiderate assholes and we cant change their behaviour. We can just control the impact on us.

if they have now started singing to techno, maybe they are actually doing it on purpose to disturb you op? I'm wfh & have had to had a lot of patience but singing to techno at 3 o clock on a monday.
what age are they???

YANU - I'm fine with everyday life noise like talking or children playing but music, which is deliberately designed as a listening experience, is a different style of noise that causes problems. Many people can have conversations at once, neighbours talking in their garden does not prevent me from also talking in mine, but if neighbours are playing loud music that does mean that I can't play music (over headphones or quietly) because the sound will clash, and it can also be disruptive to conversation or quiet enjoyment.

@Coyoacan

They've started singing along now

Hahaha, I can just imagine these old age pensioners singing along to techno.

Sorry OP, it must be very annoying but frankly there is nothing you can do or say to stop them, so the best thing is to make whatever adjustments required

By then it had moved to R&B!

@mygood He is early sixties - his wife late 50s I believe. Early retirement (he owned a shop).

play loud(er) music back at them?

My neighbours have two young grandchildren round and they are playing in a paddling pool and shrieking. I use ear plugs and then turn the radio up to a volume where I can only hear the music. Cuts out the noise of the kids plus any other unwanted noise such as unexpected callers. To be fair the grandkids are only there about every 2 weeks.

The answer is to generate some noise that is to your taste which cuts out the neighbours.

I'll bet they're trying to drown out the sound of you talking all day.
I have a new neighbour, works from home, obviously sat at the back bedroom window which is always open. He had the LOUDEST voice, damn right I turn my music up if I'm off work and trying to relax in my garden, I do not want to listen him talking loudly all day.
Homes are primarily for living in not working in.
Shut your office door /get headphones /rent office space.. You have various options available, expecting people to stop enjoying their own homes isn't one of them.

YANBU, and some of the people saying you are seem (bizarrely) to have a chip on their shoulder about people who wfh. I'd be annoyed even if I weren't working from home. It's not easy to even relax with music blaring at the boundary.

Listening to music in your garden? OK! Playing it loudly right by the fence and when you're no longer even out there (assuming as much, since they didn't speak up)? That's not "neighbourly".

But if this person has anger issues and isn't approachable, and if the noise isn't at a time or level to be breaking any rules, you'll probably just have to solve it yourself by closing the door or wearing headphones. I'd be tempted to play my own music back at them, but when you know the neighbour's a nasty piece of work, that's probably not the best idea.

All the "get noise-cancelling" headphones advice is nonsense - rather than have a ridiculous situation where dozens of neighbours might need to put on their headphones, the person creating the noise should be wearing them

Totally agree @ChainJane. I find it really sad that so many people on here think the onus is on the "victim" to suck it up, to change, rather than the noisy wotsits to have some consideration for everyone else. It's not just their immediate neighbours who are going to hear their noise after all, as noise doesn't respect property boundaries!

I was brought up to consider how my actions could affect others, so not to play music loud enough to disturb (to wear headphones if it might), and as a child was discouraged from screaming when playing. I certainly didn't feel miserable having these rules as I understood it was the right thing to do when living near other people.

@Famousinlove

Shazam the song and play it on your speaker but out of time, that'll piss them off

Brilliant!

Keep knocking and shouting and tell them to turn it down. I bet its far from the house because they dont want the noise inside!

Playing loud, constant music that can be heard by neighbors is selfish. You could be sick or work shifts or grieving or just want a bit of peace.

If they dont pack it in turn your own music up so it interferes with their lives. My horrid ex neighbors were so noisy for 10 hours a day every day but would complain if someone else cut their own grass!

I cannot believe that @Aqua55 you are using the pandemic to be less considerate! People should be considerate always but particularly during a pandemic!

Get a headset. I hate team meetings where one person relies on the laptop mic. It's always echoey and as you say picks up every bit of background noise too

So do you really just want a moan about it rather than the suggestions that you asked for in your OP?

@user1471538283

I cannot believe that *@Aqua55* you are using the pandemic to be less considerate! People should be considerate always but particularly during a pandemic!

I've given up being considerate in all areas. When people are considerate about me and my families health by taking simple steps like washing hands, keeping their distance and wearing a mask, then I'll join in.

Until then, I really cannot give a fuck about whether somebody dislikes my music, hates my kid running around a restaurant, if I've parked outside someone else's house for a couple of days, etc.

As far as I'm concerned, this country and an awful lot of its people are shit.

People who play music in the garden are selfish a*holes if you ask me. My neighbours don't do it, but there's a family a few doors down who often do at weekends, and I can hear it it if I'm sitting in the garden. It's astonishes me how some people can be so oblivious and inconsiderate of others these days. Don't they realise that the whole neighbourhood doesn't want to hear their crap music?