To not pick up the peas?

[inpixiehollow]

We were invited out yesterday for sunday lunch with my MIL and her 94 year old mother. We went to a local pub, me and my partner, MIL, partners grandma and our 11 month old daughter.
I hadn't been to the pub before but wasn't impressed with it, the food wasn't great and the pub needed a good clean everywhere but we made the best of it wanting to be polite. We all had a carvery and I shared some of mine onto my daughters plate including peas. When we were done there was some mess left under the highchair (honestly not much at all, some very small bits of meat and peas) MIL's mum remarked that our daughter had made such a mess. I replied that it would only take a few minutes for them to sweep/hoover it up but she seemed horrified I wasn't going to get on my hands and knees on a pretty dirty carpet, in 29 degree heat and diligently pick up each scrap of food. I should add that the pub was almost empty too so no reason why the staff wouldn't have time to quickly tidy up. Having worked in hospitality I wouldn't have expected parents to bother about this small amount of food on the floor? I wiped down the highchair and the table where she had left gravy/mashed potato but left the, at the most 10 peas on the floor.. WIBU?

No one is asking anyone to properly clean after themselves. We are heading towards mn wxtreme arguments here.

Just a bit so it doesn't look like a group of chimpanzees had a food fight (at a positive scenario a FOOD fight).
Yes, staff i supposed to be cleaning, and that's absolutely fine, but what some people leave is just way ott and diagusting.

Also. It's nwver just 10 peas whe person says 10 peas😂 It's like me in a gp surgery.
"Do you smoke?"
"Yeah. Like 8-10 a day"
Total bullshit😁

I think for me the biggest thing that surprises me about this thread is the perceived difference between leaving mess on the table, and leaving it on the floor. I've always generally tried to be considerate and tried to minimise any mess left, but I've never thought of mess on the floor and mess on the table as particularly different from one another. So in the same way that I would clean up as best I could on a table but if there was, say, a spilt drink I didn't have the cleaning spray to sort out properly, that might be mopped with a tissue but left sticky - I would pick up obvious bits of the floor but there might be some mess that needs a dustpan/mop/hoover. I wouldn't stress more about that mess than a spillage on the table. I don't really see why having to clean the floor is seen as slavery, but the table isn't. I just try to generally minimise the mess.

It's much easier to clean the table than the floor. Especially with semi liquids.

From table you come with blueroll and a spray. Get everything onto one plate, scoop it up with blue roll onto the plate etc, wipe, done. Take plates back, come back for blue roll and spray.

With floor you do that, wipe the chair (because when there is a mess on the floor, it's guaranteed on chair too), bring bruah or little hoover. Scoop up semi liquids (mash potatoes and sauces) with blue roll, sweep/hoover the rest while moving chair out of the way and back into position (it's never just 10 peas) Take plates back, come back for hoover/brush, take to its place if big, if not, take spray and blue roll too.

More work. Annoying. I had kids eating in mine and nwver had foor on floor.

I mean my house

Yes @aSofaNearYou I agree. Obviously try to minimise mess, use table napkin to mop up any major spills or splodges, if you drop something big pick it up etc. But not the end of the world if table staff need to do a quick sweep underneath or wipe of the table. And if there was a major spill eg entire plate going on floor obviously you'd apologise but wait staff would have to deal. The idea that a pregnant lady not wanting to scrabble on hands and knees on a dirty pub floor means she's some sort of lady of the manor is just removed from reality imho.

Literally no-one is talking about picking up crumbs

You said...

I would never expect to have to pick up dropped food at a restaurant. I would alert staff to a spill and apologies if it was dangerous but that's about it.

The idea that a pregnant lady not wanting to scrabble on hands and knees on a dirty pub floor means she's some sort of lady of the manor is just removed from reality imho.

And this ^^

The OP didn't mention her pregnancy at all in her opening post, instead she chose to justify her and her DP's lack of manners by mentioning the food and cleanliness wasn't up to her standards.

Sure, it probably is difficult to bend (not scrabble around on hands and knees 🙄 ) to quickly pick up the dropped meat and peas while pregnant, but her DP presumably isn't pregnant and anyway, she'd still be pregnant if the food and restaurant met her standards.

Peas/crumbs - they're a category of food that are better suited to dustpan and brush than individual picking up. If she'd dropped like a jacket potato fair enough, pick it up - peas, totally reasonable for staff to sweep up.

And the meat?

@SchrodingersImmigrant

It's much easier to clean the table than the floor. Especially with semi liquids.

From table you come with blueroll and a spray. Get everything onto one plate, scoop it up with blue roll onto the plate etc, wipe, done. Take plates back, come back for blue roll and spray.

With floor you do that, wipe the chair (because when there is a mess on the floor, it's guaranteed on chair too), bring bruah or little hoover. Scoop up semi liquids (mash potatoes and sauces) with blue roll, sweep/hoover the rest while moving chair out of the way and back into position (it's never just 10 peas) Take plates back, come back for hoover/brush, take to its place if big, if not, take spray and blue roll too.

More work. Annoying. I had kids eating in mine and nwver had foor on floor.

But surely these are all also reasons why it's less practical for customers to do it themselves? Because they don't have that equipment. They can't hoover without a Hoover. All the more reason to just try not to make too much mess, but not the end of the world if you can't fully clean what you do make.

There is a simple solution to this though.
Watch the table manners

@SchrodingersImmigrant

There is a simple solution to this though. Watch the table manners

Of a baby who is less than a year old?

@aSofaNearYou

Totally agree with your posts.

@SchrodingersImmigrant

There is a simple solution to this though. Watch the table manners

So your kids never made a mess when weaning?

Sorry but I leave it as I find it. Waitresses wait on tables, bring food and drinks and take back dishes, not have to clean the floor between sittings. If my kids make a mess I sort it out, same as I would if I dropped something. It's just basic manners. Sadly too many people don't care anymore.

@SchrodingersImmigrant

There is a simple solution to this though. Watch the table manners

Well yes, of course, with a child who is, say, 3 or 4 years old, you make sure they learn proper table manners and are careful with their food.

The OP was there with a baby. If you want to sit there and try and enforce proper table manners with a baby then go right ahead, and everyone around you will watch and laugh.

I’m sure they’ll be far too busy with their conversations and families to sit and laugh at someone else - and if they’re the kind who have nothing else to do when they’re out for lunch but bitch and snigger at others they’re probably not worth bothering about.

I would have picked them up. I also stack up plates etc in a cafe and put everything neatly on the tray and make sure there is no rubbish eg used napkins left on the table. DH would leave it all as it is.
I used to be a waitress, he has never done a job like that.

Adults drop food too.

Imagining people at a fancy restaurant grubbing around on their hands and knees after paying the bill picking up all the food they dropped 🤣

@brokenbiscuitsx

Adults drop food too.

Imagining people at a fancy restaurant grubbing around on their hands and knees after paying the bill picking up all the food they dropped 🤣

If I drop anything on the floor regardless of whether it’s a Michelin starred restaurant or a local tea room I kind of move it with my foot then pick it up when it’s alongside me.

@brokenbiscuitsx

Adults drop food too.

Imagining people at a fancy restaurant grubbing around on their hands and knees after paying the bill picking up all the food they dropped 🤣

Imagine being an adult thinking it's ok to drop food on the floor and not pick it up

To tidy up for a kids table mess is good manners, but stuff spilt on the floor I would leave. It is a bit embarrassing, but it is worth mentioning to the staff and a good tip would be a nice touch.
You are normally charged for service, and the staff should be prepared to tidy up around a table as preparation for another customer.

Me personally I would clean it up, but then I always stack the empty plates and cutlery so it’s easier for them to grab it all up in one batch. I also then use a napkin to at least wipe down as best I can. I think it’s just common courtesy. On the other hand, my partner rolls his eyes as me saying they’re getting paid to do that. It would not stop me doing it however, they get paid the worse wage ever to be treated like slaves. Nope I’m sorry, I’ll do my bit to be as courteous as I can. I would not treat my own home that way, so why should I leave a restaurant that way. YABU

I think you were rude to leave that mess under the table. Yes the carpet was dirty but you behaved without grace imo.