To not pick up the peas?

[inpixiehollow]

We were invited out yesterday for sunday lunch with my MIL and her 94 year old mother. We went to a local pub, me and my partner, MIL, partners grandma and our 11 month old daughter.
I hadn't been to the pub before but wasn't impressed with it, the food wasn't great and the pub needed a good clean everywhere but we made the best of it wanting to be polite. We all had a carvery and I shared some of mine onto my daughters plate including peas. When we were done there was some mess left under the highchair (honestly not much at all, some very small bits of meat and peas) MIL's mum remarked that our daughter had made such a mess. I replied that it would only take a few minutes for them to sweep/hoover it up but she seemed horrified I wasn't going to get on my hands and knees on a pretty dirty carpet, in 29 degree heat and diligently pick up each scrap of food. I should add that the pub was almost empty too so no reason why the staff wouldn't have time to quickly tidy up. Having worked in hospitality I wouldn't have expected parents to bother about this small amount of food on the floor? I wiped down the highchair and the table where she had left gravy/mashed potato but left the, at the most 10 peas on the floor.. WIBU?

I mean the staff will have sprays and cloths etc, whereas a customer will only have their hands

If you have a kid with you, you have wipes with you.

@BoredZelda

I mean the staff will have sprays and cloths etc, whereas a customer will only have their hands

If you have a kid with you, you have wipes with you.

Not necessarily? I have a two year old and don't always have wipes on me. Plus wipes are not as effective for cleaning up proper mess in carpet etc.

@MaMelon

My point obviously wasn't primarily about bending, it was about them having the proper stuff to clean with*

See my earlier post about the toilet. Think of it that was and stop trying to make it more than it is.

You have quoted me here but I have no idea what the rest of this comment means 🤷‍♀️

You have quoted me here but I have no idea what the rest of this comment means

I mean - look at my earlier post from 10:01 about cleaning up after yourself when you’ve used a toilet in a restaurant and think of clearing up the worst of the mess you might leave at the table a similar way.

Again who are these people that let their DCs routinely make so much mess that a few wet wipes and napkins can't be used to clear it up ?

I can see that accidents will happen, but this routine mess is generally avoidable when out in public. Just keep an eye on the DC whilst they're eating and remove food if they're playing around rather than eating.

@MaMelon

You have quoted me here but I have no idea what the rest of this comment means

I mean - look at my earlier post from 10:01 about cleaning up after yourself when you’ve used a toilet in a restaurant and think of clearing up the worst of the mess you might leave at the table a similar way.

I see. Makes sense and I'm not saying people shouldn't clean up for themselves on principle, obviously. I'd clean up big chunks that have fallen within reach but I wouldn't be overly concerned about peas rolling away. I guess most often what goes uncleaned are flaky foods that drop crumbs. As I say, I can't quite marry you the level of horror and disgust here with the fact that universally every single member of staff I have encountered, after I've apologised and asked if they have something I could sweep up the mess with, has said something along the lines of "don't worry, I'll sort it", and totally brushed away my concern with their tone.

If you have a kid with you, you have wipes with you.

I have a teenager. I don't carry wipes with me when I take her out. 🤷‍♀️

I can't quite marry you the level of horror and disgust here with the fact that universally every single member of staff I have encountered, after I've apologised and asked if they have something I could sweep up the mess with, has said something along the lines of "don't worry, I'll sort it", and totally brushed away my concern with their tone.

Yep. I see your point completely here.

after I've apologised and asked if they have something I could sweep up the mess with

No, they probably won't go and get you a sweeping brush as they'll be busy most of the time. What most people manage to do is not spend time apologising and asking the waiting staff for cleaning items but simply bend down and pick up the bigger bits of food (like peas and meat).

If you don't have wipes, pick up the food with a napkin 🤷‍♀️

If was just a few, as you said, I'd have left it. If she tipped her whole plate on the floor - I'd clear it up.
Surely the pint of going out to eat is that you pay for the service alongside the food. That's cooking, washing up and clearing up.

@MaMelon

after I've apologised and asked if they have something I could sweep up the mess with

No, they probably won't go and get you a sweeping brush as they'll be busy most of the time. What most people manage to do is not spend time apologising and asking the waiting staff for cleaning items but simply bend down and pick up the bigger bits of food (like peas and meat).

Yes I just said I would pick up the big bits. I'm struggling to see why you are being so rude over such a minor issue.

No-one is being rude. It's such a non-issue - you or your child drop food, you bend down and pick it up with a napkin. You pay the bill. You leave.

It's the easiest thing in the world - no need to ask for sweeping brushes, or crawl on all fours, or call over the waiting staff or any of the other complications some posters have introduced to this simple task.

@MaMelon

No-one is being rude. It's such a non-issue - you or your child drop food, you bend down and pick it up with a napkin. You pay the bill. You leave.

It's the easiest thing in the world - no need to ask for sweeping brushes, or crawl on all fours, or call over the waiting staff or any of the other complications some posters have introduced to this simple task.

Depends how bad the mess is, doesn't it? I've left restaurants many times with the kind of mess that needs a going over, it's not just bending down once to pick up one thing, that doesn't really qualify as a mess. You are being somewhat rude, tbh. Child drops food, often crumby things that aren't easy to pick up, I ask if there's anything I can use to clean up what I couldn't get quickly with a napkin, they say don't worry about it at all. Non event. Not worth patronising people on the internet for.

No, my post is not rude or patronising. If you are electing to take umbrage then that is your choice.

A few peas and meat as per the OP can easily be picked up (and should be picked up) without any of the drama or fuss or whataboutery there has been on here.

@aSofaNearYou

100% agree with your last post. Spot on.

Anyway I'm off out for tea this evening with my baby. I'll make sure to retrieve any stray peas off the carpet; don't worry.

except there won't be any as she's 3 months old and breastfed but couldn't resist

Excellent - always nice when parents do the decent thing and clean up after their children (and themselves)

Terrible attitude.
Waiting staff are there to clear the table and serve you. They are not slaves.
Next time your daughter makes a mess on the floor pick it up, and have some respect.

@MaMelon

No, my post is not rude or patronising. If you are electing to take umbrage then that is your choice.

A few peas and meat as per the OP can easily be picked up (and should be picked up) without any of the drama or fuss or whataboutery there has been on here.

Actually your language has been very patronising, lots of references to people "managing" and how it's such a "simple task" etc. I'm not upset by it I just really don't see why you think it's necessary to talk to people the way you are over this very small issue.

Having done my best to pick up any obvious dropped chunks and checked that the weighting staff are ok with a few other crumbs, I really don't see why it is such an enormous deal for them to end up sweeping up a bit on the floor, as opposed to dealing with a huge mess on the table? Why is cleaning the table their job and cleaning the floor "slavery"? It's just not that big a deal. I would pick it up if it was easy and obvious but sometimes things like cake crumbs get scattered and stick to carpet. It happens. It is not the crime of the century and it is not practical for customers to end the meal plucking each crumb from the carpet.

@inpixiehollow Poor you.
I was surprised that the goady bastards have kept this going for 17 pages. 17 Pages of demonstrating their stupidity and hatefulness.
You did nothing wrong, as I mentioned earlier.
How stupid to NOT understand the difference between a private house or a commercial activity.
Blame it on the heat and excuse their reactions.

I often witness people leaving an atrocious mess after eating in a cafe or restaurant with young children. Can honestly say I've never witnessed anyone attempting to clear up after themselves. Obviously,none of these people have been Mumsnet-ters.

YABU - you can’t be bothered to pick it but expect the staff to do so. Charming

Actually your language has been very patronising, lots of references to people "managing" and how it's such a "simple task" etc.

Actually if you wish to take umbrage or imagine things or start talking about cake crumbs which has nothing to do with the OP that’s your choice.

We are talking about a pub-restaurant, not a canteen, and the staff are not there just to smile and clear plates. In France, where there is a strong restaurant culture, the staff would be shocked and embarrassed if you started clearing up after your lunch. Just apologise to the waitress and don't tip if she doesn't smile and insist it's not a problem.