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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not want to see any adult who hasn’t had the vaccine

331 replies

Fthisshitimdone · 15/07/2021 23:15

I don’t feel like I want to hang out with anyone who has refused the vaccine. AIBU? It’s not only because I am worried they are carrying the virus it’s also because I resent them. I think they’re being selfish and also that they think they’re better than the rest of us!

OP posts:

newmummy21 · 16/07/2021 10:32

You have to do what you feel comfortable with. Everyone has that right

I remember living in this society. I miss it.

Parker231 · 16/07/2021 10:37

I wonder how many of the unvaccinated will quickly change their mind if the U.K. brings in the same restrictions as France have just introduced?

FiveToedSloth · 16/07/2021 10:37

Parker231

I do wonder about people who think it’s ok for others to take the risk over a new vaccine but they will wait to see what happens.

They don’t think it’s ok and they don’t think that anyone should take the risk! Moderna are just starting to study the effects on fertility, birth outcomes etc! Now, after goodness knows how many women have had their trial vaccine.

lactofree · 16/07/2021 10:38

Firstly, how would you know if somebody has had the vaccine or not? Do you ask for proof? I hope you don't go around asking people. It's none of your business

Secondly, you can still carry the virus even if you've had the vaccine

Thirdly, you've had the vaccine so what's your problem?

What do you do when you go out of the house? There will be a lot of people out there very close to you in shops and on the streets who don't have the vaccine

SupermanWithTheGreyHair · 16/07/2021 10:38

I wonder how many of the unvaccinated will quickly change their mind if the U.K. brings in the same restrictions as France have just introduced?

No idea. But i won’t be changing my mind. The only issue with the France situation is that they’re going to charge for tests. Otherwise seems fine to me.

FiveToedSloth · 16/07/2021 10:39

Parker231

I wonder how many of the unvaccinated will quickly change their mind if the U.K. brings in the same restrictions as France have just introduced?

They wouldn’t be changing their mind. They’d be doing it against their wishes!

ilovesooty · 16/07/2021 10:40

@Starbar66

Interesting to see so many anti-OP comments but a hefty vote in agreement...

It certainly is.

AllesAusLiebe · 16/07/2021 10:40

I remember living in this society. I miss it.

This. 100%. Why anyone thinks they have a right to know someone else's medical history and vaccination status is completely foreign to me.

Also, OP, the idea that your social chat with your friends is related to fucking covid and vaccines. I wouldn't want to know you, if that's the limitations of your conversation. Grow up.

SupermanWithTheGreyHair · 16/07/2021 10:41

I remember living in this society. I miss it.

We still do. You just have to ignore people who judge everyone else. Be comfortable with your own decisions.

lagerandblack · 16/07/2021 10:46

How old are you OP? My guess is about 10 years old. Now crack on with your school work before school's out for summer.

FiveToedSloth · 16/07/2021 10:46

Brabraboo

You seem to have invented a fictional anti vaxxer. I’m none of the things you describe. I don’t eat McD or drink coke, or smoke and barely touch alcohol. I have in the past had severe reactions to all sorts of things and I am refusing the vaccine because I have weighed up the risks and benefits and for me the risk is not worth it, also considering I have had the virus. I have done my own research... reading the actual study protocols and analysing the PHE and ONS statistics. I’m very much qualified to read scientific papers and understand them (not just because I have a brain that works, but because it was part of my field of study). I don’t listen to what Sharon on Facebook says any more than I blindly follow what a corrupt government tells me to do.

tigger1001 · 16/07/2021 10:48

@newmummy21

I think it’s a bit backwards to penalise people for wanting autonomy over their own body and decisions.

I think it's fucking terrifying.

Totally agree!

newmummy21 · 16/07/2021 10:48

@SupermanWithTheGreyHair

I remember living in this society. I miss it.

We still do. You just have to ignore people who judge everyone else. Be comfortable with your own decisions.

True.

tigger1001 · 16/07/2021 10:54

@AllesAusLiebe

I remember living in this society. I miss it.

This. 100%. Why anyone thinks they have a right to know someone else's medical history and vaccination status is completely foreign to me.

Also, OP, the idea that your social chat with your friends is related to fucking covid and vaccines. I wouldn't want to know you, if that's the limitations of your conversation. Grow up.

And agree with this!

I can't imagine being asked if I'm vaccinated before going out with friends. Can't imagine me asking others what their vaccination status is. And if they say they are not, do people honestly follow that up with "why not?" Because it's none of their business.

We are always going to be around unvaccinated people. I've got kids - so there's two straight away in my house!

ilovesooty · 16/07/2021 10:55

@lagerandblack

How old are you OP? My guess is about 10 years old. Now crack on with your school work before school's out for summer.

You think that response is edgy and clever?

Parker231 · 16/07/2021 10:56

My friend is checking frequently. She is clinically vulnerable and can’t be vaccinated. She still has to go to work and live her life. She needs others to protect her.

MarshaBradyo · 16/07/2021 11:01

I thought advice was to be careful if CEV you’d have to be able to ask close friends etc to know.

I couldn’t get angry over someone following advice. Although I am vaccinated

Sittingonabench · 16/07/2021 11:02

@Bouncebacker I’m so sorry for your loss and your struggles with this. There is no comfort when you lose someone so close. But you have my admiration for getting yourself through it. This discussion must be exceptionally hard for people in your position.

Kakey1294129 · 16/07/2021 11:06

Whilst I think that people can make their own decisions I don't think you are being unreasonable op. It's your choice not to see unvaccinated people like it's their choice not to get their vaccine.

My youngest sister is the same. The rest of us have had it and she hasn't. It's her choice but I feel she's putting my elderly grandma at risk but what can I do!

SupermanWithTheGreyHair · 16/07/2021 11:08

My friend is checking frequently. She is clinically vulnerable and can’t be vaccinated. She still has to go to work and live her life. She needs others to protect her.

I do feel very much for CV people especially if they want to be vaccinated and can’t be. But regardless of anyone’s situation, you can’t tell others what they do with their body. And people don’t have to tell others their medical information, I genuinely wouldn’t mind someone asking me, especially if I knew it was from a place of genuine concern as in your friends case, but many people want to know so they can give a lecture it would seem. That’s not ok.

MareofBeasttown · 16/07/2021 11:09

@Parker231

My friend is checking frequently. She is clinically vulnerable and can’t be vaccinated. She still has to go to work and live her life. She needs others to protect her.

I have been asked as well by a friend looking after her 90-yr-old CEV mum. This is the reality of the pandemic world, and nostalgia for a pre-pandemic world seems misplaced to me, though I hope we return to it. I am not going to take offence. If the government is going to leave us all to exercise personal responsibility and do away with masks, people are going to ask surely?

RolloTomassi · 16/07/2021 11:09

I cannot understand the head space some people give this, and the arrogant expectation that everyone should feel the same, or be "punished".

I doubt withholding your friendship is going to be a game-changer for your mates but if it makes you feel better you're of course free to do so.

Arsebucket · 16/07/2021 11:12

@Parker231

I do wonder about people who think it’s ok for others to take the risk over a new vaccine but they will wait to see what happens.

So what should I do then? Take it because everyone else has and sod my own reservations?

No, sorry. Other people have made their own choice to take it. Just like i’ve made my own choice not to.

ilovesooty · 16/07/2021 11:16

If someone is medically contraindicated against vaccination or wanting to wait during pregnancy that's a different matter for me compared to someone who's just refusing.

I know of someone who along with her son has refused the vaccine
They share care of her CEV parent with her sister. Both the parent and the other sibling carer have expressed anxiety about the situation and her response apparently was "We're antivaxxers. Put up with it." if I knew her personally I don't think I'd want to be friendly with her.

Arsebucket · 16/07/2021 11:17

@Parker231

I wonder how many of the unvaccinated will quickly change their mind if the U.K. brings in the same restrictions as France have just introduced?

I wouldn’t. Being coerced into a vaccine that i’m not sure about wouldn’t sit right with me.

I’ve already left a long career that I was good at and enjoyed because it will soon be mandatory to take one of these vaccines that I am not comfortable to take yet.

I have no desire to go on holiday during a pandemic, or go go go crowded places anyway.

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