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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is a ridiculous reason for DS to be put into isolation?

211 replies

varskudd · 15/07/2021 11:13

DS(15) came home from school very annoyed yesterday, he said he was put into isolation for having a drawing on his hand/wrist. He got bored so he drew on his hand with a pen, but it's not just scribbles.

Apparently, he was told to go to the toilet and wash it off and he tried to but it wouldn't come off so they sent him to isolation. He tried to get it off at home and it wouldn't, I tried to this morning and it slightly faded but it's still there.

Aibu to think this is ridiculous?

OP posts:
OliviaWainright · 15/07/2021 14:11

I remember getting a detention for drawing on my hand in 1988. It was a heart with IL in bubble writing in it Blush

casualnamechange · 15/07/2021 14:13

It’s fucking ridiculous. What, they’re presumably worried that drawing on his hand will impact his learning (I guess if he did do it in a lesson), so they send him to isolation which is definitely going to impact his learning!

Elisheva · 15/07/2021 14:17

so they send him to isolation which is definitely going to impact his learning!

Yes, but not anyone else’s.

SeaPinks · 15/07/2021 14:18

This is what isolation rooms are like, in case anyone thinks it's a child in a room on their own like I used to think. We didn't have them when I was at school so I didn't know.

To think this is a ridiculous reason for DS to be put into isolation?
Thiswayy · 15/07/2021 14:24

What has actually happened to school nowadays? More focus on the pathetic rules than actual learning.
One time I got caught by my teacher writing a fake note to get out of PE and he just laughed and said I used to do that too and took it off me. That was it.
If that happened now I probably would have been expelled and never allowed back.

Maggiesfarm · 15/07/2021 14:27

@varskudd

DS said he didn't draw it during the lesson he was sent out of, the teacher only noticed because someone asked him if it was a tattoo and DS said no and he was told to wash it off, the teacher hadn't noticed until then.
Then he shouldn't have been sent out.

It will probably come off by tomorrow.

grapewine · 15/07/2021 14:32

@3littlemonkeys82

My son was put in isolation because another child threw a individually sealed biscuit at him. Rather than leave it where it landed he put it in his pocket. You can't have food in your blazer pockets...isolation.

He asked if he should have left it on the floor, was told he'd have been put in isolation for littering.

He asked if he could leave the line (this was in the corridor pre class) to put it in the bin. Was told he'd got an attitude and to go to see the head teacher...he now also had detention as well as isolation.

Not allowed to leave them on the floor, not allowed to pick them up, not allowed to put them in the bin. Didn't ask the other child to throw them to him either, just a quick "DC, catch!" moment.

Honestly such a waste of everyone's time. Some schools are stricter than prisons at this point.

This is crazy. What nonsense.

I assume the child throwing it was also punished like this? Otherwise, I'd be pissed off.

Changes17 · 15/07/2021 14:32

OP, it sounds ridiculous. I'd have been in isolation all the time under these rules and I was a student who did very well. Are we just teaching our kids to comply and never to think for themselves?

I'd be writing a note to school to say something like: DS does not understand why he was put into isolation yesterday for having a doodle on his hand. Can you explain it to me, because I just don't get it either, and then I can have a sensible conversation with him about it.

Maybe as they are explaining they will realise it's worth thinking it through before sending kids to isolation. It's pointless having rules if you never explain why they are in place. We just end up with mindless compliance otherwise - which does no-one any good.

grapewine · 15/07/2021 14:37

@FuckingFabulous

My 12 yo got put in isolation last week for having the wrong colour pen for self marking his work. All classes have green except maths, where the teacher prefers red. He had green, couldn't find his red, got put in isolation and had a 30 minute after school detention. Which the teacher thought perfectly reasonable and couldn't believe I was querying whether marking in a green pen once was at all disruptive.
WTF? I'm really glad I didn't go to school in the UK. We had detention, sure, if we were disruptive and talked back, but this is nuts.
SupermanWithTheGreyHair · 15/07/2021 14:40

If he didn’t do it in lesson whilst he was meant to be learning, and it wasn’t offensive, then yes it seems ridiculous. But are you sure it wasn’t a case of one of these things, what exactly was the drawing of?

Blossomtoes · 15/07/2021 14:40

@Youdiditanyway

Guessing it’s because instead of listening to the teacher, he was drawing on his hand. Difficult to concentrate on the lesson if your head is down focusing on drawing…
On the contrary, for lots of people doodling is an aid to concentration. It’s absolutely crazy, OP. Thank goodness I and my kids went to school in saner times.
ahoyshipmates · 15/07/2021 14:42

We were threatened with detention for drawing on our hands, so we didn't do it - and that was in the 1970's. I doubt that much has changed.

QuestionableMouse · 15/07/2021 14:42

@NeverDropYourMoonCup

If it hasn't come off, doesn't that mean he's used permanent ink, like a sharpie or marker?

Even when I was at school, permanent markers were strictly forbidden and everywhere I've worked since, sharpies have also been banned, because they are the pens used for graffiti.

Perhaps the school rules at your DS's place are similar, so the isolation was for having a pen he isn't allowed to have, not the writing on his hand in itself?

www.amazon.co.uk/Pentel-Medium-Waterproof-Resistant-Document/dp/B000SHQWPM?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

There's pens like this that are permanent but not classed as permanent markers. I used these in my uni exams.

Bumblenums1234 · 15/07/2021 14:52

Isolation for uniform infringements (which I think this is what this all boils down to really) are ridiculous.

SpiderinaWingMirror · 15/07/2021 14:57

My nephew was put into isolation for not listening. My sister pointed out yet again that he was profoundly deaf and had been put at the back of the classroom.
Similarly he get detention for not doing homework that was not written on the board, not on the learning system but the teacher told them to do whilst everyone was packing up at the end of the lesson. "Everyone else heard".

ASpoolofBlueThread · 15/07/2021 14:59

Use hand sanitiser to get it off! My DS draws on his hands all the time, drives me mad. Thankfully school don't care!

LittleTiger007 · 15/07/2021 15:06

This will be a matter for the individual school. If the rule there is no tattoos or other adornments on the skin then that’s the rule. He had an opportunity to wash it off… so he used a sharpie. Stupid and teenagers do do stupid things. Lesson learned. He won’t break the rules next time.

LittleTiger007 · 15/07/2021 15:08

@ahoyshipmates

We were threatened with detention for drawing on our hands, so we didn't do it - and that was in the 1970's. I doubt that much has changed.
Exactly. If it’s the rule then it’s the rule whether we agree or not.
Iquitit · 15/07/2021 15:08

@ASpoolofBlueThread

Use hand sanitiser to get it off! My DS draws on his hands all the time, drives me mad. Thankfully school don't care!
Was just going to suggest that! The alcohol gel that we use at work is great for removing pen from skin without too much irritation!

And yes, I think it's a bit ridiculous really.

SparrowNest · 15/07/2021 15:11

Has anyone got any advise on how to avoid sending my kids to a school like this, or is it increasingly that they’re all like this? That Birbalsingh woman makes my blood run cold.

SeaPinks · 15/07/2021 15:13

@SparrowNest

Has anyone got any advise on how to avoid sending my kids to a school like this, or is it increasingly that they’re all like this? That Birbalsingh woman makes my blood run cold.
You could look up the behaviour policy on the school website. Ours has got a detailed grid showing how it works.
Soubriquet · 15/07/2021 15:13

@SpiderinaWingMirror

My nephew was put into isolation for not listening. My sister pointed out yet again that he was profoundly deaf and had been put at the back of the classroom. Similarly he get detention for not doing homework that was not written on the board, not on the learning system but the teacher told them to do whilst everyone was packing up at the end of the lesson. "Everyone else heard".
That would infuriate me and I would be pointing out that the school is being disablist but not properly accommodating your nephew. I’m deaf so this riles me up even more
GreyhoundG1rl · 15/07/2021 15:13

@SparrowNest

Has anyone got any advise on how to avoid sending my kids to a school like this, or is it increasingly that they’re all like this? That Birbalsingh woman makes my blood run cold.
School like what?
SparrowNest · 15/07/2021 15:34

@SeaPinks thanks

@GreyhoundG1rl the kind of school that would put a child in isolation because they scribbled on their hand. I think that’s unnecessarily harsh and it wouldn’t be my preference for my kids.

Blossomtoes · 15/07/2021 15:38

If it’s the rule then it’s the rule whether we agree or not

I just don’t get this. I brought mine up to obey rules if there’s a good reason for them and not to just mindlessly follow them if they made no sense. As a result they’re skilled in risk assessment and capable of independent thought.