To my half siblings shouldn’t get 50% of my parent’s house?

[reannneeee]

Paternal half siblings. They are 20 and 22 years older than me. Their mum joint owns with their stepdad and she was better off after the divorce as he left her the house. Me and my full brother raised in social housing as my mum and dad always struggled for money.

My parents ended up expressing a wish to purchase their property with Right To Buy in my late teens. They had a fair amount saved up but nowhere near enough. The property is in a desirable area and I saw it as a steal to get it with the Right To Buy Discount, so I agreed to save up and then give the money to my parents to use to be able to use Right To Buy. I ended up providing about 75% of the money (it took a good few years and meant I spent bugger all on fun and delayed my own life events) used for it. My full sibling has a learning disability and can’t live independently. The deal between me, my mum and dad was if I helped them to be able to buy the house, once they go I could have it and use 25% of the money on supporting my brother. None of the house is mine legally but we knew it’d benefit me and my brother in future if I helped them buy it now.

This was a few years ago. DF has now decided to write a will, he isn’t ill but wants to in the event of a sudden death. He has decided he’d feel guilty doing the original plan and excluding his older children. He now wants us to have 25% of the house each. He says that my financial support in making it possible for them to buy the house is negated by the fact that they let me live there rent free. I’ve not expressed this to him but I’m quite annoyed. My mum was also the bigger contributor for their portion of the deposit out of the 2 of them. I also know that when they go, all of the care for DB will go on me. I’ve already been told I’ll be his power of attorney, will manage his money etc. My half siblings are significantly older with their own well established lives. Mum is upset as well but doesn’t want to rock the boat.

Aibu to think DF is being unfair?

@reannneeee

Yes I know technically could have got my own mortgage and saved for that but my area is ridiculous and with the RTB discount taken off my parents house I could have gotten maybe a 1 bed flat for the same amount.

So you took advantage of your parent's right to buy (can't entirely blame you for that) but why do you think the entire asset appreciation should go to you?

@reannneeee
I never wanted to be legally involved with the house. I wanted to help them purchase the house as an investment for mine and DB’s future, and then as soon as it was done I left. I wanted to be able to forget about the house then until further notice, I moved into a rental property and lived my own life. I stayed with my parents rent free for a long time to be able to save the money.

You did want the house secured for your and your DB's future so you should have got something legally sorted out at the time. Even if it was your parent's Wills and your half siblings should have been informed.

OP, I understand why you are frustrated with the situation but you assumed your DF would honour a verbal agreement. Things change and he has had second thoughts. This was clearly a very important and necessary input from you so you should have made sure your agreement was water tight and spoken to a solicitor at the time.

As I said earlier on, what were you going to do if one or both of your parents needed to go into residential care and the house needed to be sold to pay the costs.

Your half-siblings could have contested the Will at any point.

If, at the time this had all been open and documented you might not be in this position.

Also, there is no point in your mum agreeing with you but not being assertive enough to sort the situation out. Does she agree with you or is she just saying she does so she doesn't upset you?

Going forward, what plans are they putting in place for your DB?

Do you have any documentation to prove your investment and verbal agreement?

Go and see a solicitor and hopefully you can resolve this situation.

Also assuming you would inherit 75% of the property for 75% of the deposit was a a stretch. Did you also contribute to the mortgage?

OP you might have come on here just to vent which is totally understandable.

If however you want to secure your share of the house you will need to take legal advice urgently. There is never any guarantee of what anyone will leave you in their will. People (even family) are capricious. Your father is on a mission to play Lord Bountiful with assets that might not be his to leave, and your mum is unwilling to intervene.

Ignore well- intentioned advice on here, the fact is only a lawyer with full knowledge of your circumstances can advise on the way forward. You might be able to get advice for a fixed fee.

Wishing you all the best whatever you decide to do.

@Ideasplease322

Also assuming you would inherit 75% of the property for 75% of the deposit was a a stretch. Did you also contribute to the mortgage?

They lived there rent free, so probably not.

You weren’t living rent free if you paid for the house, he’s the one who’s been living mortgage free because of you! I’d tell him you’ll challenge the will and it will cost loads and cause problems so he can write that will if he likes but it will cause a lot of problems and bad feeling after he’s gone, does he want that?

@TheRebelle

You weren’t living rent free if you paid for the house, he’s the one who’s been living mortgage free because of you! I’d tell him you’ll challenge the will and it will cost loads and cause problems so he can write that will if he likes but it will cause a lot of problems and bad feeling after he’s gone, does he want that?

Op didn't pay the mortgage

DF won’t even consider giving me the 42k back and then splitting the rest 25% each because it’s not fair on half-sibs apparently

Have you tried pointing out that had it not been for you contribution they wouldn't have a house to bequeath at all?

As said, I'd tell your DF to either think again or make other future plans for your DB, whether you mean it or not ... though as I asked before, why are you so willing to take on all his care?

OP I think what your father is doing is morally wrong. But I’m not a legal expert, and a lot of the folk on here won’t be (even if they have the best intentions or slight knowledge). Please go see a solicitor

If they are doing that get whatever you paid back off him

Sorry you need to go to a lawyer. How DARE your dad give away your money? And say that he let you live there rent free when your money paid for 75% of the house! He needs some home truths and you need legal advice.

I know it's hard but this is your life, you only get one, and you need to drive it, not your dad.

It probably was stupid of me to expect 75% of the property, but that was the mutual agreement with my parents. They never stated otherwise at any point until DF made this decision.

I don’t even care about 75% anymore. I just want my contribution to them owning their house acknowledged. I want my 42k back as a minimum. And an apology from DF.

I don’t understand why he thinks this is okay.

I was only 18 when it all started and quite naive.

I wonder if this was DF’s intention all along and I feel really used.

He does have guilt over his elder 2 daughter’s. He had them 50/50, saw them right financially etc. They say that themselves. This was before I was even born. But the divorce was down to him being unfaithful to their mum (not with my mum, years before) and I don’t think he’s ever gotten over the guilt.

It isn’t my fault though. Or my mum’s or brother’s. He tricked us.

@reannneeee

What plans are they putting in place for your DB?

Do you have any proof of your investment?

If you make an appointment to get some legal advice your DF might realise that you are serious and that you need some return for your contribution.

If your mum agrees with you, she should be talking to your DF about this.

He can pay you back what you put in to the house and then leave it 25.% to each of you. That is not his money to go giving people imo.

DB currently lives with them. They get his DLA and make his medical decisions.

Once they are no longer capable it’s on me. I never offered, it’s expected of me. And I’d never abandon DB. I will absolutely make sure he gets the best care. DB’s future is a massive worry of mine.

You should have protected your contribution to house deposit in the first place by ring fencing it, I'm afraid, and your sibling will probably be looked after by the state if he has severe special needs so won't benefit from any inheritance. However, you dad only owns half the house so he can only leave half its value in his will, as he sees fit, as your mum owns the other half.

Can you register an equitable interest against the property now?

@reannneeee
Once they are no longer capable it’s on me. I never offered, it’s expected of me. And I’d never abandon DB. I will absolutely make sure he gets the best care. DB’s future is a massive worry of mine.

That isn't fair either. Your parents need to acknowledge the situation with your DB and put plans in place. OP, I know you are saying you wouldn't abandon your DB and I know you mean that but you don't know what life is going to throw at you. It really isn't right that you are carrying this massive worry. Your DF is not acknowledging your contribution and the difficulties with your DB and your DM is not being assertive. Please get some legal advice.

42K is a huge amount of money.If the house was valued at 300K all those year ago, i'm guessing you are in London and its worth 700K+ now?

Your dad is just seeing that amount and thinking he can be the big man giving everyone a huge chunk of money. You need to forget about what your half siblings have received, that's not relevant.

It's not OK, I can see why you are aggrieved. however a 42K investment wouldn't have bought you the house.

Personally i'd be withdrawing all offers to help DB, until they return the 42K (they can't they don't have the cash) or they allowed a charge against the house. He's not your child and its not your duty to care for him. Strong words with your mother may help, does she want to die knowing no one is looking out for DB?

You can challenge the will, but it would be a nightmare, better to get your mum on board. Unfortunately this will always sour your view on you dad.

If you post the actual figures, someone can help you work out what is a fair appreciation for the investment.

Your dad has played a right blunder here, the bastard.

Get in touch with land registry and register your interest in the house as your 42k

Or tell them to deduct your rent for the months you lived there from the £42k, add interest at bank rates and that’s what they owe you, then the balance can split 25% each

[quote RincewindsHat]@soontobe60 you must be one of the OP's parents! It's not grabby, it's how asset appreciation works. The £42k was not a gift. It was an investment on the OP's part with the understanding she would eventually inherit 75% of the property. If that had not been the case, the money would not have been handed over. Her father is the grabby ungrateful one here.[/quote]
Why would she inherit 75%? She didn’t pay 75%, she paid 14%. At best she may be entitled to 14% of the total value of the property and the rest split equally between all the siblings. On a property with a value of £500k, that would give her £177,500 and her siblings £107000. Not a bad return on her money I’d say.

Make sure there is legal protection in place for yourself and your brother that you can both live in the property until your death