Page 12 | Would you find this rude? Colleague leaving?

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 14/07/2021 23:06

OP, can I advise you to get this thread taken down.

I don't think you are going to give any more context and so will continually get posts that will anger or upset you, and I don't think it's sounds like you're in the right frame of mind for it

MotionActivatedDog · 14/07/2021 23:07

Well whatever has caused your awful people skills, you should work on them. Or just not deal with people.

Original poster

TomForddr · 14/07/2021 23:08

@MotionActivatedDog

Well whatever has caused your awful people skills, you should work on them. Or just not deal with people.

Yeah perhaps I should be disappear.

OP posts:

Original poster

TomForddr · 14/07/2021 23:08

just disappear.

OP posts:

Original poster

TomForddr · 14/07/2021 23:09

Thanks for helping me see that. You’re a good person.

Goodbye and have a lovely evening.

OP posts:

MotionActivatedDog · 14/07/2021 23:10

Or you could just be nice to people? That’s an option.

FunTimes2020 · 14/07/2021 23:15

Sorry OP, I think I was a rude twat. I'm sure you are a nice person. Ignore me x

BoxHedge · 14/07/2021 23:15

@WomanStanleyWoman
But presumably if they’re pleased to be leaving, they won’t give a shit?
Yes presumably they don’t give a shit, but that’s not what the question was.

And you’d have to be pretty paranoid to be upset if a colleague said they were pleased to be leaving - why would you take it personally? Unless they said ‘I’m leaving because you’re a total bitch and you’re ruining my life’.

To me, I’d assume they hated the working environment, or found it beneath them, or dull, feel no friendship with colleagues, or feel sorry for everyone still working there. Wouldn’t necessarily feel upset but I’d think “alright just F off then”

It would be a bit like someone standing up at a work drinks event and saying “I’m delighted to announce I’m going home”

Goodbye emails where I work are always pleasant, saying how lovely it was to get to know such great people, that you enjoyed much of your time there, that you’ll miss everyone, hope to cross paths again etc.

It could well be the last interaction you have in your life with some people you’ve got to know quite well over years.

I am trying to think of a scenario where it would be funny and not weird/rude. Can’t! Even if someone won the lottery, it would not be a very gracious way to go.

spinningaroundthemoon · 14/07/2021 23:16

@MotionActivatedDog

Well whatever has caused your awful people skills, you should work on them. Or just not deal with people.

Maybe take your own advice?

Ikeatears · 14/07/2021 23:20

An ex-colleague of mine did a speech at on her last day (usual in this workplace, particularly for long serving members of staff) She finished her speech with "so long motherfuckers" 🤷🏼‍♀️

BoxHedge · 14/07/2021 23:21

Missed the whole middle weird bit of this thread!

For what it’s worth I assumed it was an email 🤷‍♀️

I’m with you OP!

Drivingmeupthewall · 14/07/2021 23:21

I don’t think the OP should have started this thread. They got very nasty to some posters, shared a load of additional information that was sad but drip fed, then sort of huffed off, but in a worrying way when it wasn’t going well.

EarringsandLipstick · 14/07/2021 23:22

This thread is so odd. It's like some posters have inside knowledge about each other, or else I'm slow on the uptake. 🤔

spinningaroundthemoon · 14/07/2021 23:24

I’d love to leave in a blaze of glory and write a long email about what I disliked about each person. The one who put the blind down every single day, the one would warm up fish in the microwave, the one who asked too many questions when they’d worked there 5 years longer than me.

But I’m a wuss and wouldn’t want to burn bridges.

spinningaroundthemoon · 14/07/2021 23:27

@Drivingmeupthewall

I don’t think the OP should have started this thread. They got very nasty to some posters, shared a load of additional information that was sad but drip fed, then sort of huffed off, but in a worrying way when it wasn’t going well.

But what exactly was said that you would class as “very nasty”?

I alway find this odd about AIBU that anyone can come into a thread and say whatever they want but an OP cannot say anything apart from “thanks for the beating”

This is such a toxic part of the forum.

ZZTopGuitarSolo · 14/07/2021 23:32

@EarringsandLipstick

This thread is so odd. It's like some posters have inside knowledge about each other, or else I'm slow on the uptake. 🤔

There's been a lot of attempted 'gotchas' at the OP on this thread. It's been weird.

Bargebill19 · 14/07/2021 23:33

Why did people automatically assume it was in an email?

ZZTopGuitarSolo · 14/07/2021 23:34

@Bargebill19

Why did people automatically assume it was in an email?

Why not?

It's perfectly normal everywhere I've worked for people to send out an email letting everyone know they've left. This is how I've pretty much always found out.

And in Covid times it's even more likely.

Bargebill19 · 14/07/2021 23:40

Really? Never ever done that. Email to HR and line manager but no one else. Wouldn’t even have their email address unless used in conjunction with work. Then would only use it for work items not to let them know I’d resigned!!

AColdDuncanGoodhew · 14/07/2021 23:40

I’d laugh too, that’s brilliant!

DukeofEarlGrey · 14/07/2021 23:40

@firealarmhell

Could be worse. I left a "Sorry for your loss" card on my last day.

I am currently working my notice period in a toxic job. You're an inspiration!

LifeinPieces21 · 14/07/2021 23:44

@TomForddr

If they said “its a pleasure to announce I’m leaving”

I would have had loved to have had the balls to say this when I left my last job. The owners were very rich and posh and thought all their employers were beneath them.

LifeinPieces21 · 14/07/2021 23:44

Employees even

ZZTopGuitarSolo · 14/07/2021 23:47

@Bargebill19

Really? Never ever done that. Email to HR and line manager but no one else. Wouldn’t even have their email address unless used in conjunction with work. Then would only use it for work items not to let them know I’d resigned!!

Always worth remembering that other people do things differently to how you do them, rather than assuming they're making stuff up.

WomanStanleyWoman · 14/07/2021 23:50

[quote BoxHedge]@WomanStanleyWoman
But presumably if they’re pleased to be leaving, they won’t give a shit?
Yes presumably they don’t give a shit, but that’s not what the question was.

And you’d have to be pretty paranoid to be upset if a colleague said they were pleased to be leaving - why would you take it personally? Unless they said ‘I’m leaving because you’re a total bitch and you’re ruining my life’.

To me, I’d assume they hated the working environment, or found it beneath them, or dull, feel no friendship with colleagues, or feel sorry for everyone still working there. Wouldn’t necessarily feel upset but I’d think “alright just F off then”

It would be a bit like someone standing up at a work drinks event and saying “I’m delighted to announce I’m going home”

Goodbye emails where I work are always pleasant, saying how lovely it was to get to know such great people, that you enjoyed much of your time there, that you’ll miss everyone, hope to cross paths again etc.

It could well be the last interaction you have in your life with some people you’ve got to know quite well over years.

I am trying to think of a scenario where it would be funny and not weird/rude. Can’t! Even if someone won the lottery, it would not be a very gracious way to go.[/quote]
I get the impression that the OP has a similar approach to you. Being honest enough to say you’re glad to be out of the place, forcing people to acknowledge that you are unhappy, is not quite nice; not very gracious. We should all be terribly polite and pretend everything is fine.

Well WHY should we? What’s wrong with being honest enough to say I’m not happy, so I’m glad I’m going? Not being happy in your job doesn’t necessarily translate to hating your colleagues. In fact, when I’ve had a crap time in a job, that’s when I’ve needed work friends the most!