Piercing a 2yr olds ears..

[Thelogicescapesme]

It's not a cultural thing in this case, more so the toddler is being treat like a fashion accessory. Mum had it done because mum thinks it's "pretty and girly"

As an adult whom has had to have two piercings surgically removed and antibiotics for complications post procedure I think it's fucking bonkers that anybody would inflict it on a small child.

AIBU and what are your thoughts?

I have a Spanish friend who said that in Spain they actually pierce new born babies ears right there in the hospital if you so desire

One of my friends lived in Spain, apparently it's something midwives do, it's not supposed to hurt as much. But the other thing is that she said you never see a Spanish child with anything other than small studs in their ears.

I think 2 years is absolutely the worse age, too old to not know any different and old enough to mess with them, catch them on clothing etc.

I hate it personally. Piercing guns cause trauma and cannot be sterilised to a high enough standard.

I hate this mantra, people don't understand what sterile means. Guns are designed for piercing the most recent ones are single use.

Needles used for piercing are not designed for piercing and are not sterile the moment the piercer touches them. Yes I know the piercer wears gloves but they do not wear sterile gloves or have a sterile field.

Well I like it and don't think it's abuse or weird. It's not that unusual in real life, the reason MN don't like it is because they think it's common. I'm quite posh actually and still did it. This is so goady and vile, the OP knows full well it will become a bitchfest as all the others do. Her next post... AIBU to think men who like shaved fannies are paedos? Yawn, so predictable.

I buy single use kits in Boots and do it myself. Nobody dead yet.

I was 5 and I wanted them so we went a jeweller’s (not Claire’s). It is not child abuse My DM made sure they were clean and taught me good hygiene practises. I know loads of people with piercings and no one had them infected. Seems like you went to a dodgy place and didn’t clean your piercings properly.

vile,& definitely child abuse,but unfortunately that's the me,me,me brigade

When the child is old enough to a) ask for it, and b) look after the piercings themselves

I think it's really offensive to call it child abuse as someone who was abused as a child. Only vilness there is a person who thinks it's OK to say that. Yuck.

It's completely unnecessary and something that is done entirely for the parents rather than the child.

It's actually quite cruel as there can be complications. My ears took ages to heal properly after being pierced as an adult and were quite painful. They are still sensitive now but I chose it.

Why would you inflict that on your child who can't even consent?

I don't know why it is even legal to do this to a young child.

It's abuse, plain and simple.
Inflicting pain on a child unnecessarily.
At what point would these people find it wrong? Driving a needle through their ears is fine? What about nose? Belly button? Hand?
If you heard of a person poking a needle through a child's skin in any other circumstance, it would be physical abuse.
Cannot wrap my head around it one bit.

Actually really annoyed by that comment. I think chil abuse is being taken in a car repeatedly by a man and raped and abused before the age of 10. To belittle that for an earring is below contempt.

@Cavalierqueen

Actually really annoyed by that comment. I think chil abuse is being taken in a car repeatedly by a man and raped and abused before the age of 10. To belittle that for an earring is below contempt.

I don't think anyone here would suggest otherwise.

@Cavalierqueen

I think it's really offensive to call it child abuse as someone who was abused as a child. Only vilness there is a person who thinks it's OK to say that. Yuck.

There are of course different levels of child abuse and I don't think anyone would say this is comparable to serious cases of abuse/ neglect.

However, if my parents had done this to me as a young child I think I would have found it quite traumatic and I would definitely be harbouring some resentment about it now. I was scared of getting my ears pierced and didn't want it, and in the end I didn't have it done until adulthood.

I actually think it is abusive because it is inflicting physical pain to which the child cannot consent, and the child does not benefit in any way, so it's not like a necessary innoculation.

It's not on the same scale as some types of abuse, but that doesn't mean it's not abuse.

I had mine done when I was two. I’m glad because I’m far too much of a whimp to get it done now.

I think there should be a minimum age for any piercing, in line with tattoos.

I honestly don't get the angst on mumsnet about ear piercing. It's not permanent so if a cold doesn't want it they can let them heal over.

@LittleBlackCat22

I had mine done when I was two. I’m glad because I’m far too much of a whimp to get it done now.

That's great, but your parents couldn't have predicted how you would feel about it. At 2 years old you could not give your consent either way, it was just done to you and I imagine it was quite painful at the time. The skin of a 2 year old is much more sensitive than an adult's.

@strawberrydonuts you would be a traumatized adult and Harbour resentment. Bloody hell, lucky you have never really experienced child abuse, a pierced ear is a walk in the park compared to navigating through the complex relationships in your family when you have been actual abused.

@RedHelenB

I honestly don't get the angst on mumsnet about ear piercing. It's not permanent so if a cold doesn't want it they can let them heal over.

But why would you not just wait until they are old enough to decide that they DO want it? Rather than mutilating their body before they can actually consent?

I live in NYC and it is more common here, it seems popular amongst Hispanic communities as well as Hasidic communities. I think it’s absolutely fine and often looks really pretty. As for the posters likening it to child abuse, what privileged lives you lead to think that ear piercing is remotely akin to child abuse. You do understand just how offensive that is right?

[quote Cavalierqueen]@strawberrydonuts you would be a traumatized adult and Harbour resentment. Bloody hell, lucky you have never really experienced child abuse, a pierced ear is a walk in the park compared to navigating through the complex relationships in your family when you have been actual abused.[/quote]
Interesting assumptions you are making about me there.

[quote Cavalierqueen]@strawberrydonuts you would be a traumatized adult and Harbour resentment. Bloody hell, lucky you have never really experienced child abuse, a pierced ear is a walk in the park compared to navigating through the complex relationships in your family when you have been actual abused.[/quote]
Ffs. 'Actually abused' - so the definitions of abuse are defined by you, and you only, are they?
What would you define physical abuse as? Is it not inflicting pain upon a child?
Would you condone nose/belly/tongue piercings? Where do you draw the line and why?
Do you condone 6 month old getting their ears pierced without consent? What about elderly people with cognitive conditions? Would it be abuse to get grannys ears pierced if she couldn't consent? What about a child with severe learning disabilities? Do you even understand consent at all?

@Feather12

I live in NYC and it is more common here, it seems popular amongst Hispanic communities as well as Hasidic communities. I think it’s absolutely fine and often looks really pretty. As for the posters likening it to child abuse, what privileged lives you lead to think that ear piercing is remotely akin to child abuse. You do understand just how offensive that is right?

As I said. The word "abuse" is a sliding scale.

If we ignore child abuse which is on the lower end of that scale, then we do wrong by children all over the world.

Just because a child has not been raped, sexually abused, violently assaulted or severely neglected does not mean that "abuse" of one kind of another hasn't happened.

Yes, severe abuse happens, it's horrendous and nobody is saying that an ear piercing is in any way comparible.

However, the word "abuse" similar to "harm" "suffering" or any other adjective has a relative scale.

It is abusive to physically mutilate a child when they are not able to consent.

Sorry misuse of adjective there, but you know what I mean.

@Feather12

I live in NYC and it is more common here, it seems popular amongst Hispanic communities as well as Hasidic communities. I think it’s absolutely fine and often looks really pretty. As for the posters likening it to child abuse, what privileged lives you lead to think that ear piercing is remotely akin to child abuse. You do understand just how offensive that is right?

You have no idea about the life I have lived and what I have been through. Inflicting pain on a child who cannot consent is abuse.

I think it's highly unlikely a person who would resent their parents for childhood ear piercing has ever had much to worry about in life to be honest. Still at least that level of preciousness has given me a laugh on a Saturday morning.