Words and phrases that confused you as a child at school - or am I the only one?

[FortunesFave]

I clearly remember thinking 'what?" whenever the teacher mentioned "The Apparatus" during PE.

I didn't know what apparatus was! This was in primary school. She'd shout to the group of us in the 'big hall' "Don't touch the apparatus!" during the times when we were allowed to run around aimlessly during "PE lessons"

Then there was the mysterious "Cloakroom" I couldn't work out if this was a euphemism for toilets or if they meant the tiny bit of the corridor where we hung our coats.

Still not sure. Was I a lone weirdo who didn't understand basic stuff?

@KrakowDawn

Ah! I was trying it I. A Scottish accent to see if I'd missed something (too rude to is about all I could come up with!).

Me too!

With you all on the goal defence in hockey. Never had a clue what I was doing.

Two for me - “sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me”. This totally confused me because so much at school was about being nice to people and anyone being “mean” was very naughty. So quite why there was a rhyme saying it didn’t matter, I could never understand. And I always pictured smallish twigs and pebbles for the “sticks and stones”, so couldn’t quite picture them being that nasty.

The other one was primary colours - I always quietly thought that primary colours were grey, white and navy, because those were the colours of our primary school uniform. I very nearly answered a question about “what are the primary colours” in an art lesson in y7, and just managed to catch myself in time as I realised that all the kids who had come from other primary schools would have had different colour uniforms.

I started primary school in the spring term as I am August born. I distinctly remember being confused for ages and ages when we said grace before lunch and the Lord’s Prayer in assembly - no one taught or showed me the words so I just mumbled along! My family aren’t religious so I never brought it up at home and no one ever mentioned it…

Ooh and another - the word “junior”. In my primary school we had infants and juniors. Hence, to me, “juniors” meant the big grown up ones.
For quite a long time I couldn’t understand people using “junior” to mean “for younger people”. As I slowly became aware of the additional word “senior” it started to quietly fall into place….

@LadyJaye

2 root 2?

Like 'toddledoo!', like a trumpet?

Oh god. I was clearly completely alone and absolutely nobody else gets it. No wonder the entire class looked at me like I was an idiot...

I got it! But I was thinking more like an owl than a trumpet 🎺

@Walkingthedog46

Razed to the ground (ie spoken about bombing during the war) always puzzled me as a child. I thought it was ‘raised’ to the ground and I wondered how something that had been flattened could be raised up!!

I thought exactly the same.

The other that confused me was 'troop'. In a history lesson we were told eg that 1,000 troops were killed in a particular battle. I asked how many people that was because I thought a 'troop' was a group of soldiers (along the lines of a battalion) so if 1,000 troops had been killed it must have been eg 5,000 soldiers.

I was confused by our teacher who would say 'were you born in a barn?' if we left the door open. Still doesn't make much sense to me. Also that thing where teachers would correct you if you said 'can I go to the toilet please?' with 'yes I'm sure you can, but don't you mean may I?' Just seemed to be things to confuse small children.

"She's no better than she ought to be" What does that even mean?! Confuses me to this day!!

In Scripture lesson at Primary we had the story of Joseph's brothers seeing the caravan of Ishmaelites and their camels. We then had to draw a picture of the scene.

I needn't go on, need I?

@PoorPawsPickPawpaws

I never understood why all the TOILET signs were missing the I.

Even when it was explained to me that it was TO LET, I still didn't understand what that meant.

Haha. That was me too. We'd be travelling along a residential road on holiday and needing to go to the toilet, I used to shout "There's a toilet! " as we passed a house to let!

@TellingBone

In Scripture lesson at Primary we had the story of Joseph's brothers seeing the caravan of Ishmaelites and their camels. We then had to draw a picture of the scene.

I needn't go on, need I?

Yes! You need to go on! I don't get that at all.

When reciting the 'Hail Mary'. I was sure our Headmaster said
' Blessed art thou amongst swim in.'
I imagined Our Lady swimming at the baths in a competition, it really confused me. Of course the correct words were ' Blessed art thou amongst women' 😊

I was always confused by the clubs at high school, the daily announcements always mentioned the day/time they were on but there was never any information about where to go or how to join any of them.

As a result I only ever joined one (volleyball) in my final year as it was brand new and they wanted people to join. We never had a teacher telling us the rules after the first lesson though, he was busy with basketball in the next hall so he would set up the nets with us and leave so we would just mess around for the whole time.

I rarely stayed for school dinners at primary school either as we lived close to the school and I always went home instead (DM was a SAHM until I was in my mid teens). One day I had to stay and I had no idea where to go or what to ask for so just got the same as the person in front of me. I ended up with a cheese roll, crisps and some cake and custard. The hall monitor then told us we had to eat our hot food first so I ate my cake and custard since the roll and crisps were cold.

I remember my art teacher saying he wouldn't be at work the next day and asking why. He said he was "Going to see a man about a dog". So I naturally assumed he was getting a new dog!

Not at school, but the ‘Dilute to taste’ message on squash bottles.

How daft was that? You didn’t have to dilute it in order to taste it!

It was some years before I realised what they meant by that sort of ‘taste’.

Thought it was obvious.

My Ishmaelites were hanging out of the window of a holiday caravan being towed by a camel. All with happy grins because they were going on their holidays obvs.

I was also never taught how to leapfrog and it wasn't anything we ever did at my first school, even at playtime, so I just didn't know how to make my body do it (even though I knew what they looked like etc). We moved house (and schools) and at gym time the teacher wanted us to leapfrog. I told her I couldn't so she told me to jump around the back of the person I was to leapfrog instead. Then when I did that she commented "that was a weird leapfrog" to me.

That was 30 years ago, not only does it still annoy me, I still can't do a leapfrog. The one time I drunkenly tried to leapfrog a short bollard I got my arse stuck on top and fell over sideways/head-first onto the ground instead.

Another netball Goal Defence here. Also clueless. Clearly we have spotted a pattern.

Is it because your job is to defend the goal, so it explains itself? I mean, 'Centre' doesn't tell you what to do. 'Wing Attack' could be misinterpreted without a clear definition of the 'wings' referred to...

At the beginning of my 2nd year at school, I thought one of the names on the cloakroom pegs of the new kindergarten lot was the weirdest ever. Peen-loap!

(That was until I heard someone say Penelope, and the penny dropped, but it was quite a while.).

@TellingBone

Thought it was obvious.

My Ishmaelites were hanging out of the window of a holiday caravan being towed by a camel. All with happy grins because they were going on their holidays obvs.

It wasn't obvious but I'm glad you explained it because it's proper funny!!

Yes, whenever a teacher said 'several'. I honestly thought it meant seven, so would be confused as to why the number seven had its own alternative name. I was 14 when it was gently explained to me. 😳

@TellingBone

Thought it was obvious.

My Ishmaelites were hanging out of the window of a holiday caravan being towed by a camel. All with happy grins because they were going on their holidays obvs.

I understand completely. When I was small, I thought Pontius Pilate flew an airplane.

I also thought that in the Lord's Prayer, we were asking the Lord to "forgive our trash baskets." Trash basket is a term for a particular type of decorative waste bin in the Southern US. I was really confused about why we had to ask forgiveness for them. Everyone had at least one in their house.

@SenecaFallsRedux

When I was small, I thought Pontius Pilate flew an airplane

These are getting funnier and funnier

When football scores were announced on the radio I always thought ‘on aggregate’ meant it was too wet to play on the grass so they had used a school playground or something.

In assembly, at primary school, we sometimes sang the hymn which started 'There is a green hill far away without (i.e. outside) a city wall..' I always used to have a mental picture of all these other hills nearby with walls round them. Never really questioned it!