To buy a new outfit for every play date?

[Summertimelostitsshine]

For my toddler Dd? Nothing fancy, just something lovely from baby Zara, for example.
I also sort of buy her new outfits to match places/the colours where we are going, to look aesthetically pleasing in Instagram photos etc..I’m weird, aren’t I 😬

@Summertimelostitsshine

For my toddler Dd? Nothing fancy, just something lovely from baby Zara, for example. I also sort of buy her new outfits to match places/the colours where we are going, to look aesthetically pleasing in Instagram photos etc..I’m weird, aren’t I 😬

Weird is one way of putting it i suppose.

Your dd isnt a prop in the story of your life. Let her be a baby in her own right. Comfy clothes and get mucky thats how babies learn. Not by posing in the latest fashions.

This has to be a reverse or a wind up surely?

@Summertimelostitsshine

The pictures and the memories of the experience will give you happy memories for years to come. As long as it’s not all about trying to get the perfect photo to the detriment of the day out then I think it’s fine.

When they’re stroppy teens you can look back lovingly at the photos of when they were cute and well behaved!!

@nokidshere No I can see that’s wrong and we don’t do that, she doesn’t sit/stand still long enough anyway, my shots are natural and when she’s generally not aware. I’m
also aware to be Bert in the moment with her, as she’s only little for a short time, ironically it’s the moments I don’t want to ever forgot, so try to capture them 🤷🏻‍♀️😟

Well, my dd wouldnt be seen dead in most things I enjoyed dressing in her very young when she developed a personality so o that front - enjoy it while you can.

My eldest was always immaculate in outfits from Next. I had so many nice comments. Ds3, not so much. Ds3 and dd spend more time in a state of undress and looking like I found them both in a skip.

So generally it wears off the more kids you have and as the kids choose their own style. If you can offord it and it diesnt go to waste then you do you I think.

I love the odd second hand kids outfit and as a pp has said - someone has to buy them new

@Smallbutnottinykitten

It’s not that you’re buying clothes for her - every baby and toddler needs clothes replacing regularly.

It’s that your picking clothes for how they’re going to look at a particular place on Instagram and dressing your daughter in “aesthetically pleasing” clothes that match your Instagram vision of a day out.

That’s giving your daughter messages that I really feel uncomfortable with. And I say that as the mother of two grown up daughters who have run the whole Insta thing and thank god are coming out the other side and recognise how dangerous it is for youngsters.

This. And op you say you’re picking clothes like a long white dress as it will suit the place you’re going snd make a good photo, few three year olds are comfy in a long white dress. Just like few adults are. And without doubt this is using her as a prop or accessory.

At three ask her what she wants to wear. Help her develop her own personality. The best insta photos are th happy genuine ones caught in an off guard moment.

At three years old you need to focus on helping her develop her own personality ask her what she wants to wear. It doesn’t matter if it’s a bat man outfit and wellies. Don’t give her the impression it’s all about how she looks.

Yes appearance is important. We are all judged on how we present ourselves, but at three it should be about fun and individuality not her mothers social media.

Lighthearted though you're trying to make this, one of your comments has just rung alarm bells with me. Dressing your daughter up like a doll because you are unhappy with how you look is not in your daughters best interests. Sort out how you feel about your own appearance and don't try to live vicariously through her. As she gets older that dynamic can have a huge effect on her, I've seen it happen to my daughter's friend.

@WorraLiberty Yes, probably.

@Willow2017 She doesn’t pose in the latest fashions, it’s not like that as I’ve tried to explain. She’s a very confident, happy, imaginative, messy, fun girl. She would have any idea what I was putting on her or barely notices the odd photo

@Watermelon221 That’s the aim 💜thank you

Honestly it's quite pathetic. You've been completely brainwashed by social media it seems. But you aren't the first and certainly not the last.

Do you take pics of your Costa infront of your steering wheel too?

That's rhetorical. Because you definetly do.

op go to gap and stock up on new clothes as they are closing all their shops UK everything is on sale

I dress my kids down for play dates, they’re going to get messy so I wouldn’t want to ruin nice stuff. But my 2 look like nobody owns them.

@Bluntness100 She chose the white dress. It’s actually not my style as I’m not into dresses really, it’s long, cotton and loose, perfect for the heat where we are

@Morgan12

With that comment I’d much rather a friend who takes photos of Costa cups and her daughters outfits than have one that spouts meaningful garbage at people you don’t know and have no idea how their life is.

I physically cringed at how sour your comment is. Get a life.

@CushionMountain Its ok I’m not unhappy with how I look, I’m messy as in not bothered about new clothes for me, I used to love fashion before she came along. It doesn’t mean I’m unhappy with how I look, I’d just prefer to spend the money on her for the time being. I think it’s completely damaging to live vicariously through your children and strongly aim to do the opposite. She doesn’t give a crap or notice the things she wears

On a thread like this; you're telling someone to get a life? 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

You may not think you're using her as a prop, but you are using her a subject for your photos. Similar to designers using models, identifying colours and 'theme' to suit their surroundings.
The thing is, that's not real life! It's not the same as wearing an Xmas top to see Santa or beach wear at the beach, this is dressing 'old worldly' to go visit some ruins...

I will admit that I do try and choose DSs nicer clothes when we go on playdates or nice days out, but rarely do I buy something for the occasion unless he doesn't have anything suitable (so new wellies if his old ones are falling apart and we're going splodging in the mud) but things are bought for suitability, longevity and in colours he likes.

@Morgan12 Yes, obviously, all the time

I drink real coffee and wouldn’t waste money on Costa, I only waste it on clothes, it would seem!

@MyMabel Thanks, me too, massively bitchy

I think some people are taking this too seriously. The op hasn't said she puts her girl in red pvc hot pants, but a white dress.

I'm into bright, scandi clothing for my toddler. It's ethical, which is good, but I spend probably far too much on the prints I love (and then sell them on after). I would quite happily choose a top with a giraffe on for the zoo, have put her in bluebell dungarees for a walk in the bluebell woods and took tons of pictures in them too! Who is it harming?

I don't buy too much from Zara kidswear, I used to work there and I personally find the style a bit muted and mature for a toddler, plus the cut isn't great for my little chunk. Linen isn't too comfy for chubby little ones 😂 But I can tell you now that an outfit twice a month (probably a grand total of about £50 a month there? An outfit for a 3 year old is probably £15-25 . I can tell you now people dropped a whole lot more than that shopping in there regularly!

She chose the white dress. It’s actually not my style as I’m not into dresses really, it’s long, cotton and loose, perfect for the heat where we are

But that wasn’t what you said OP..

I might for example put her in a long, white dress if we’re going to old type buildings, so we can get some stunning photos

OP if this is real, your daughter is not a doll to be photographed and matched with her surroundings.

She's a person.

I really hope this isn't real.

[quote Summertimelostitsshine]@Bluntness100 She chose the white dress. It’s actually not my style as I’m not into dresses really, it’s long, cotton and loose, perfect for the heat where we are[/quote]
Hang on. Story drift.

You said:

I might for example put her in a long, white dress if we’re going to old type buildings, so we can get some stunning photos.

But now you’re actually saying that she chose the long white dress, to facilitate “stunning photos”, in “old type buildings”?

Is that right?

How old did you say she was?

@Biancadelrioisback Is there something wrong with me if I sometimes think that way? I’m asking genuinely.

She chose the white dress. It’s actually not my style as I’m not into dresses really, it’s long, cotton and loose, perfect for the heat where we are

First it was for looks. Then it was because of the hot climate. Then it was because it fitted with the image of the old building. Now she chose it.

Should we draw up a shortlist or just start a sweepstake?