Responding to people asking why I'm not wearing a mask

[PhasedRay]

I can't wear a face mask and am exempt due to having issues which make it extremely uncomfortable and difficult to wear. At the start of the pandemic I used to explain to people who asked why I can't, but I was getting some nasty comments and it's made me quite cynical. When someone asks now, I just tell them to mind their own business.

AIBU? I think that rather abrupt response probably would sound unreasonable from the perspective of someone who has just asked a single question, but I have been getting questioned (feels more like an interrogation sometimes) for nearly a year and I am just sick of it.

Dd is asthmatic and can’t wear one - I know some asthmatics can but they affected her really badly.

She’s got a prepared thing to say about how you don’t have to explain why, I forget the exact words. Sadly people are even more likely to challenge teens.

Something along the lines of

I'm not wearing any knickers either

That will shut them right up

@CrouchEndTiger12

Something along the lines of

I'm not wearing any knickers either

That will shut them right up

One of those comebacks I think of when I get home...

Along with "my mask is in the same section as the 'mind your own business' aisle".

@JediGnot

I think, OP, that you need to target your anger at those who choose not to wear masks, choose to ignore the rules, choose to spread lies about vaccines. Those are the people responsible for the fact that I will view you with contempt when I see you without a mask, even though I know (or rather, am lead to believe) that a tiny minority of people can't wear one.

Agreed as otherwise the same issue with fake blue badge parking as it makes a mockery of any system based on trust (when most can’t be trusted) and a sense of civic duty of care to each other when record per capita Covid fatalities data indicates this is not the case. When every DIY sticker or most lanyard purchased online is fake - is when the spreading continues as those with least health privilege disproportionately suffer the harm caused by others. These less medically health privileged people also have ever right to enter private premises like retail where public are invited to enter subject to sensible but safe as possible health and safety rules and measures suitable in mitigating known risks. Shop keepers have every right to reject trouble makers be it those who enter to steal or cause a disturbance or even wearing inappropriate attire as to offend unless for instance in a beach or swimming pool side retail setting where clothing is more relaxed. Shop keepers have a legal duty to keep their staff and premises safe as well as the safety of invited shoppers. They therefore have a right in a pandemic control entry into their private indoor property which may indeed include all globally accepted and agreed best practice Covid risk mitigation measures. In a pandemic one cannot pander to the few but endeavour to implement measures to save as many as possible. It is offensive and disproportionate to think certain rights of a very minority of individuals trump the health and safety of the rest of the population. Reasonable pragmatic adaptations are required in exceptional cases. No one is exempt from the pandemic. There is no exempt as exempt from what exactly? No one is asking why you are exempt from anything or what items of clothing you wear or don’t/can’t wear as the real question is are you Covid free and safe for others as if so, it is immaterial what you put around your head or not. We are either all in this together or some are potentially a part of problem and not a part of the solution prolonging restrictions and potentially leading to more lives and livelihoods lost. The UK government has evidently not been proactive as testament to the world beating per capita Covid data and can not be trusted to follow the data let alone the science.

I'm torn on this. I live overseas where there is no exemption and it just doesn't seem to be an issue. I never see people collapsing or any drame about wearing a mask, people just do. I think some of this exemption stuff is just attention seeking nonsense to be honest. Elsewhere people just do it.

Because they are so visible masks are like a badge in the UK and US. Either wearing one and or making a statement against civud or telling the world you are special. I will be glad when the damn things have gone, they make people weird.

"Elsewhere people just do it."

I think you will find there are severely disabled people in every country. It is just that in some countries they are not allowed out.

@Gavellar me too. No mask, no entry to shops or public transport, and until a couple of weeks ago we had to wear masks in the street as well. I got a bus home with a friend the other week, we were the only 2 on the bus and the bus driver told us to make sure we kept our masks on.

Again if you live somewhere with no exemptions it means that some people are not being allowed out. Countries of course can make their own rules but don't think for one minute that it means everyone in that country can wear a masj and that there aren't severely disabled people unable to access services and in some cases getting very distressed indoors.

I say I have a lung condition so can’t wear one.

Generally people wear masks. I have seen some children with Autism obviously not wearing one for example but generally people don't make a fuss and as far as I know masks are not capable of killing people. There IS an element of attention seeking, it's obvious of nothing else by the Karen videos and threads on here.

One thing this has done for us is to kick a load of countries off the visit list. Don't want to visit countries that treat their disabled citizens with such contempt and worse than our prisoners.
Yea this country fucked up but at least we could go out to get some vital sun

And I am obviously not speaking about severely disabled people, I am speaking about people who don't wear a mask and would not be adversely affected by wearing one. It's just a fact.

So you can look at a person to know if they can wear one?

What utter rubbish. The UK is OK but there are far better places to live, especially in the rationing of health and social care and as for attitudes to the aging population., I think practically any other nation on earth is better. What a very standard mumsnet reaction, the need to feel superior to others because of one's own issues with no knowledge or experience of the world.

"It's none of your business". Done.

Won't matter in a few weeks anyway but the sounds of it...a lot of people won't be wearing them.

I got a bus home with a friend the other week, we were the only 2 on the bus and the bus driver told us to make sure we kept our masks on.

You know that bus drivers - particularly in large cities - were one of the occupational groups who suffered the highest rate of deaths from COVID. By wearing a mask, you're showing that you respect the driver's health & safety.

I would like us as a nation to have a rather better sense of care for others when we're out in public, as one sees in many south east Asian countries. There, if you have cold symptoms, or a cough, for example, you wear a mask in public so that you don't infect others.

It's courteous and responsible.

I think that dealing with this pandemic has shown that we could cut the circulation of ordinary colds and flu, and that we shouldn't be so fatalistic about the 10,000 deaths per year from influenza.

We could conceivably really raise our communal well-being & productivity, and save many of those 10,000 who die from flu each year, if we retained some of the measures we've all had to follow in the last 18 months.

Wash your hands
If you're carrying a virus (the common cold, flu) wear a mask & socially distance if you have to go out in public.

Those are simple things that would help everyone.

Generally people outside of the UK think British people are grubby, not handwashing and stuff. It's a bit unfair really, I do live in Asia and they are ridiculous with the mask wearing and going to the doctor if they get an ant bite. I don't think British people handwash less do they? The country that produced Pink Stuff and Mrs Hinch?

I’ve never been asked why I’m not wearing one. I do not not wear a lanyard or a badge. Just say you’re exempt, end of story.

@CornishGem1975

"It's none of your business". Done.

Won't matter in a few weeks anyway but the sounds of it...a lot of people won't be wearing them.

It is indeed none of your business IF you are not within spitting distance or sharing the same crowded enclosed breathing airspace. Those who self diagnosed (without qualified experienced expertise) and self declare mask exempt when convenient to not be criminally fined need to be mindful and not discriminate against those with medical vulnerabilities and less health privilege than you. If you are if anywhere other than your private dwelling place it is the everyone’s business to ensure that we are all safe and do take whatever simple small respectful steps to mitigate against potential risk vectors which data has shown to be detrimental to collective health and well being. It is very unfortunate that the British public has evidently abused a trust system selfishly to the detriment of those with less health privilege and indeed the very small minority of disabled who are diagnosed as not capable of wearing a mask or even face shield. However, that does not mean you cannot be bothered too as they don’t wear one. This is not how science works as viruses only discriminates against those with least health privilege and most potential exposure to person to person asymptomatic transmission. Do the maskless ask why all others are masked even though most (apart from medics and construction workers by necessity in hazardous environments) find masks not the most comfortable item of clothing? They are doing it to protect themselves, their household bubble and to protect you too. What a world when people are prepared to risk their health and yours by lying to get out of criminal monetary fines. This as per international posters anecdotes up thread only happens in snowflake UK were people literally don’t care and even say it’s none of your business in close proximity. What a sad inditement and reflection of classic selfish British exceptionalism entitlement culture hence 0.1-0.2 million Covid fatalities already. Carry on maskless and see what happens as you can’t cheat science nor others in your breathing space.

"Because I'm medically exempt"
if they push for more
"I do not wish to share confidential medical information with you"

I’ve never been challenged, I do always wear a lanyard.
I was recently on holiday in Jersey and on the Sunday everyone was wearing masks and then at the hotel breakfast on the Monday morning something seemed different but I couldn’t put my finger on it and then I realised it was no masks. I didn’t realise but from that day masks didn’t need to be worn except in medical settings or on public transport.

I was in the car alone and forgot and walked into the supermarket without a mask and had a $200 fine. The police pointed out that the reason we are don't have to keep locking down or close malls and schools is because of the rules being enforced. I didn't mind. When in Rome do as the Roman's. When in th UK, go against the herd and be special. I actually do care about other people, I care that, as someone said, vulnerable people are not locked away to keep them safe. I also know how crippling outbreaks are to industry, having done 127 one to one redundancy meetings with my team last year because of the impact on oil prices, I do get it. If you want to be different, dye your hair, fake a limp to get attention l, anything that doesn't impact others but do know that if you physically can (and if you can go shopping you can) wear a mask and you choose not to, it is a societal thing not a you thing.

One of the exemptions is for mental health as it's recognised the mental scaring rape has on victims who are often gagged in someway to keep them quiet.