Responding to people asking why I'm not wearing a mask

[PhasedRay]

I can't wear a face mask and am exempt due to having issues which make it extremely uncomfortable and difficult to wear. At the start of the pandemic I used to explain to people who asked why I can't, but I was getting some nasty comments and it's made me quite cynical. When someone asks now, I just tell them to mind their own business.

AIBU? I think that rather abrupt response probably would sound unreasonable from the perspective of someone who has just asked a single question, but I have been getting questioned (feels more like an interrogation sometimes) for nearly a year and I am just sick of it.

@Galdos

Do non mask wearers (for whatever reason) accept that shops are usually private property, and the shop can lawfully prohibit them from entering? Most shops won't, because they'd rather have the custom. But how would a non mask wearer react to being forbidden entry to a shop, or asked to leave once inside?

That is happening, but mostly small/private shops, where non mask customers are served through the window/door. You can't "not" serve them due to the discrimination laws, but a shop owner is perfectly legally entitled to make "reasonable adjustments" which include being able to ban them from entering the shop if they can be served in another way, i.e. through the door/window.

The lanyards are for people with hidden disabilities, who may need assistance. I have had one for a long time, and I have needed help occasionally, a chair, somewhere quiet, the use of a loo, I DO wear a mask, I don't like them, and to begin with I got panic feelings but I've become used to them, and, no need to get rid of my moustache or chin whiskers.

As for the original OP, no you don't have to explain anything to anyone. If you're unable to wear a mask that is your business and yours alone!

@Bertiebiscuit

Here's the thing - you aren't exempt from passing on the virus - so what can you expect - surely you could at least wear a perspex shield to avoid passing the infection on to others - I don't care why others don't have a mask on I only care about not catching the virus - & possibly dying or getting long Covid - so I avoid you all and I don't care how you feel about all this

They can expect people not to be disablist pieces of shit.

THen I would have no choice other than leave.
If it became a rule to work I would have to leave/not apply.

During one of the lockdowns and the hospital was sectioned into clear and cv areas, to get into A&E a mask had to be worn and there was hospital security on the door to enforce this. I had to be sedated (part of my very long on going care plan) to get in there. Once admitted it was understandable why almost everything was locked down.

Have been as emergency and routine appointments during none lock downs and everything was as normal. It's well documented on my files various issues I have getting medical care, not just the inability to wear a mask. When appointments are made all this is considered

I’m pretty sure most of us could have classed ourselves as exempt, given how extremely uncomfortable and difficult to wear masks are. I find it difficult to breathe wearing one for any length of time, especially since having Covid.

I don’t think you can blame anyone for challenging you. Equally you don’t have to explain your medical issues either. Hopefully it won’t go on for much longer.

"I work in an ED department , no matter what your exemption is , it is hospital policy to wear something"

Ds is severely autistic and cannot wear a mask or visor. It has never been an issue at appointments. I would expect hospital staff to have enough knowledge of disability to understand that for some it is impossible.

They are difficult and uncomfortable to wear for everyone, sometimes experience claustrophobic/difficult to breathe also have skin reaction (burning sensation, red), but nothing sufficient to justify not wearing one. I wouldn’t challenge someone not wearing one tho, tend to assume they have a good reason unless they are behaving generally anti socially (such as shouting in people’s faces).

absolutely get the difference - I'm talking about those who choose not to wear masks because they don't like them/can't be bothered/don't care.

@Galdos

Do non mask wearers (for whatever reason) accept that shops are usually private property, and the shop can lawfully prohibit them from entering? Most shops won't, because they'd rather have the custom. But how would a non mask wearer react to being forbidden entry to a shop, or asked to leave once inside?

That's got nothing to do with other customers being sanctimonious aggressive cunts and demanding to know strangers' medical history.

How do you tell the difference from looking at someone whether genuine or not?

You cannot even tell if a person who is shouting is taking the piss or not. They might be, they also might have some type of mental or neurological illness. And of course they could just be dickheads doing it for their own bants.

"I am talking about the ED that I work in , I can’t speak for the rest of the hospital or other hospitals."

I do not believe your ED turns away disabled people who cannot wear a mask. It's obvious that some people cannot wear one and although there may be different protocols in place for those do not wear masks, they do not in the UK get refused treatment. Assuming you are in the UK.

@Underhisi

"I am talking about the ED that I work in , I can’t speak for the rest of the hospital or other hospitals."

I do not believe your ED turns away disabled people who cannot wear a mask. It's obvious that some people cannot wear one and although there may be different protocols in place for those do not wear masks, they do not in the UK get refused treatment. Assuming you are in the UK.

Me neither.

If someone is not wearing a mask I simply steer clear of them. They won't want any bugs I might have, and I don't want theirs. There is no justification in harassing people. We need to be kind to each other in these difficult times.

In about 2 weeks time we are going to have threads that are the polar opposite of this, 'why are people responding to me wearing a mask' without any sense of irony and people wanting to point score.

The my body, my choice is going to be stretched in meaning with those who expect people to wear masks ignoring the vitrol they have spewed previously and vice versa, it's a pity MN allows name changing because over the past 18 months or so there has been a lot of huprocisy on all sides of the debate.

I stopped wearing masks on June 21. No one has ever questioned me. If they did, I’d say that I was “exempt”.
If anyone questioned me further I’d politely tell them to mind their own business. This isn’t Berlin, c1944

If anyone questioned me further I’d politely tell them to mind their own business. This isn’t Berlin, c1944

It isn't and I agree, however the MN narrative will soon change where some people will posting the polar opposite of the OP and want to feel somehow repressed.

It’s none of their business. They have zero right to ask you. Tell them to f**k off!

Looking forward to the whole thing ending. Though no doubt people will still try to harass you even when you don't need to legally wear a mask.

@Julia001 Are you in the UK.

This happened in the UK

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3978398-mask-shamed-disability-complain-some-tmi

I am in the UK , patients have never been treated like that in my presence in the ED where I work. If I was that lady I would complain , the correct procedure would have been to take the lady to a cubicle to treat her so that she wasn’t at risk and she was putting no one else at risk from possible exposure. Don’t blame me or try and make out that Emergency Departments are to blame for enforcing NHS national guidelines regarding face masks. I am positive that some people may not have been treated in the correct way, but by the same token there are people that lie and abuse staff , not just in hospitals , but elsewhere too , for various reasons.

Hospital staff are humans too, we have been trying to and stay safe throughout whilst working to treat the public with not just Covid bit other Health problems too. Most people have been lovely , but there are some that think we are here to take all sorts of abuse and threats and it has gotten worse this last year.

@Underhisi

"I am talking about the ED that I work in , I can’t speak for the rest of the hospital or other hospitals."

I do not believe your ED turns away disabled people who cannot wear a mask. It's obvious that some people cannot wear one and although there may be different protocols in place for those do not wear masks, they do not in the UK get refused treatment. Assuming you are in the UK.

No , people do not get turned away that are in need of care. I have never stated as such.

Why don’t you wear a face shield instead?

Im not blaming you. Its just your post reminded me of that thread. FYI its a male poster.

I would like to think that our department would have dealt with this a bit more delicately

@Pinkfluff76

Why don’t you wear a face shield instead?

Has as been said roughly 286684 on mask threads over the past year (and not just by me ) - many people who can't wear masks can't wear visors, either.