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Original poster

Dp night out, I don't want him to go

376 replies

Summerdaysx · 29/06/2021 21:33

NC for this as I am a regular poster.

Dp has a night out planned for Saturday.

A few things are bugging me,

We have so much extra to pay for this month and just simply cannot afford it.

His friends are all talking about "getting the pussy" "going to lap dancing clubs".

He will be out until god knows what time and expect me to pick him up, I have a child.

Now I am in no way going to tell him "he's not going"

But what can I do? He will still go anyway no matter what I say!

I wish he would have to isolate for 10 days .

I simply cannot be bothered with all the arguing about it.

He will just say we will get by with money "we always do". He honestly has an answer for everything.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 01/07/2021 08:42

You will be a mug if you let him come back once he has manipulated his way into having the night out

Don’t be that mug

InFiveMins · 01/07/2021 08:49

Sounds like he has purposely left you in order to be single for this night out. Don't let him crawl his way back in.

AnyFucker · 01/07/2021 09:19

I need a little time to think it over
I need a little space just on my own
I need a little time to find my freedom
I need a little
Funny how quick the milk turns sour, isn't it, isn't it?
Your face has been looking like that for hours, hasn't it, hasn't it?
Promises, promises turn to dust
Wedding bells just turn to rust
Trust into mistrust
I need a little room to find myself
I need a little space to work it out
I need a little room all alone
I need a little
You need a little room for your big head, don't you, don't you?
You need a little space for a thousand beds, won't you, won't you?
Lips that promise, fear the worst
Tongue so sharp, the bubble burst
Just into unjust
I've had a little time to find the truth
Now I've had a little room to check what's wrong
I've had a little time, and I still love you
I've had a little
You had a little time and you had a little fun, didn't ya, didn't you?
While you had yours, do you think I had none, do you, do ya?
The freedom that you wanted bad
Is yours for good, I hope you're glad
Sad into unsad
I had a little time to think it over
Had a little room to work it out
I found a little courage to call it off
I've had a little time
I've had a little time
I've had a little time

Mumbletum · 01/07/2021 09:23

I remember in my late teens/early twenties on nights out, there was always THAT table of middle aged losers thinking they were owed something by every woman in the room.

Oh god, I remember those... I used to get chatted up by older men all the time and I would wonder what they were thinking!!

Lex345 · 01/07/2021 09:29

Oh god, I remember those... I used to get chatted up by older men all the time and I would wonder what they were thinking!!

Recapturing their youth Hmm AKA an excuse for piss poor behaviour
How many women have experienced the drunken lunge in for a kiss and then the verbal assault you would get for turning them down...some of them probably with wives or girlfriends at home as well, some wearing wedding rings! Some men are just the worst

DancesWithTortoises · 01/07/2021 09:36

In a very short time you will realise this is for the best. He's a cunt, OP. You don't need that in your life.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 01/07/2021 09:46

Similar happened to me, aeons ago... Short on money - out with blokes who were continually unfaithful...

He flounced when I objected... (not to night out, just with these neanderthals).

He left, after a major show down...
then begged to come back... Nope...

At the time I was utterly bereft... But within a few months realised I'd dodged a bullet... Now decades on I can't remember what I ever saw in him.

Original poster
Summerdaysx · 01/07/2021 10:12

Thank you all. I really appreciate all the support. My heart is broken. I feel lost.

OP posts:
Pinot4evs · 01/07/2021 10:21

How did this all happen OP?

Did you give him an ultimatum of going on the night out or you and he chose the night out?

PunishmentSnart · 01/07/2021 10:25

Why has he left you ?

It sounds like you will be much better off in the long run

AnyFucker · 01/07/2021 11:03

You are going to let him slide right back in when he’s had his “fun” aren’t you ?

BastardMonkfish · 01/07/2021 11:06

Single for his night out, how convenient! Guarantee he'll be round on Sunday wondering where his roast chicken dinner is.

mistys7thwonder · 01/07/2021 11:15

@BastardMonkfish

Single for his night out, how convenient! Guarantee he'll be round on Sunday wondering where his roast chicken dinner is.
Totally agree with this. I hope op is strong enough not to accept this behaviour
KurtWilde · 01/07/2021 11:23

@BastardMonkfish

Single for his night out, how convenient! Guarantee he'll be round on Sunday wondering where his roast chicken dinner is.
Absolutely this. I married one of these. Took some stern but kind words from posters on MN to snap me out of my stupor.
diddl · 01/07/2021 11:31

@Summerdaysx

Thank you all. I really appreciate all the support. My heart is broken. I feel lost.
I know you can't help feeling how you do-but he really isn't worth it.

He doesn't care about you at all.

milkytwilight · 01/07/2021 11:34

I know its a cliché and won't mean a lot right now but I PROMISE you'll be grateful for this one day. You'll look back, picture his face and think "God what a moron."

Original poster
Summerdaysx · 01/07/2021 12:03

What have I done? I stupidly have been texting him. He has told me that no, no matter what he's not coming back. I feel numb, I feel like I'm going to be sick. I have no strength

OP posts:
chickenyhead · 01/07/2021 12:15

OP you can get through this with your child.

You need to sort out your finances immediately. You may be entitled to benefits. Do you have the car or does he?

I'm sorry he wasn't a better man, but you do deserve better treatment.

Stillfunny · 01/07/2021 12:22

He wants to wait until after Saturday. Probaly wants you to beg him to come home and promise that he can go out whenever and whoever he wants to. Dont give in to this emotional blackmail . He will continue to do it every time you disagree with him.
You deserve better . Flowers

trevthecat · 01/07/2021 12:26

Do not have contact with him. He will contact you Sunday Eve when he's got his own way and wants family life back. My ex did this, it becomes more and more often, in the end he would be gone for weeks at a time. I left and have never looked back. He doesn't care about you. He cares about his night out

IWentAwayIStayedAway · 01/07/2021 12:29

You change the locks? Your house or joint? Rent, inform landlord. You see what extra benefits and support you're entitled to. You claim maintenance for child. He's telling you who he is. This is how he treats his family. Get angry!!

sixthtimelucky · 01/07/2021 12:43
Hmm
WiddlinDiddlin · 01/07/2021 12:49

Yep.

Locks changed.
Box up his stuff.
Look up what benefits etc you are entitled to.
Speak to the landlord ensure its YOU on the tenancy not him.

Plan your wonderful new life without this lump of useless offensive arsehole weighing you down, spending money you don't have and treating you like shite.

Ohhyeahright · 01/07/2021 13:22

Great excuse to sleep
With someone else now on his night out hasn’t he? Or try to at least. Gross.

QueenBee52 · 01/07/2021 13:24

@Ohhyeahright

Great excuse to sleep With someone else now on his night out hasn’t he? Or try to at least. Gross.

yip