To feel like looking 'average' these days is bloody hard work?

[JustGiveMeGin]

Disclaimer: I had a similar thread in style and beauty when I wasn't feeling my best. I have definitely made peace with how I look and this is NOT a woe is me thread 🤣
To even look average I have to dye the greys out of my hair, have my eyelashes and eyebrows tinted (did I mention greys?) Remove hair from underarms, legs, bikini area. Spray tan couple of times a week, moisturise after every shower (daily). Wash, conditon and blow dry hair daily. Anti wrinkle face cream twice daily after cleansing. That's just the basics....I can and do go out without makeup bit I feel better with: cc cream, face powder, bronzer, blusher, eyebrow pencil, mascara and lipstick.
To me I feel like I should look like a fucking goddess after all that effort but sadly I still sit in the firmly average camp!
Does anyone get what I mean or have I finally gone off my rocker for good?

I’ve a friend that used to say “ how much must you think of yourself to to NOT wear make up and think you look great!?”

What's wrong with thinking a lot of yourself? I don't wear makeup, I look fine. It's not a crime to think like this. Being a woman doesn't mean you need to go around listing all the bits you hate and covering them up. I eat well, don't drink much alcohol and avoid too much caffeine. I drink plenty of water. I do these things to stay healthy.

Makeup or no makeup, it's not a crime to think you look amazing.

Can we all just remind ourselves that in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't actually matter what you look like.

@beauty_redefined on insta is worth a follow. They have done loads of research on self-objectification and body image, particular looking at how this restricts people living their full lives. How many of us have avoided a social engagement because we felt too fat, or have a wardrobe of unworn clothes in sizes too small because 'I'll lose weight and then wear them'. I know I do, and I've had enough of putting life on hold until I lose 10lbs!

I’ve a friend that used to say “ how much must you think of yourself to to NOT wear make up and think you look great!?”

Well that's just fucking tragic.

I think I look worse with make up to be honest.

I'm bloody radiant.

I genuinely don't think I have ever seen anyone who looks better without make up than with, but then that is just personal opinion isn't it. I wouldn't go so far as to say that you must think a lot of yourself to not wear make up, I just think that they are happy with themselves and that's that. It could be said that people who really go all out think a lot of themselves to bother with all the extra faff.

I genuinely don't think I have ever seen anyone who looks better without make up than with, but then that is just personal opinion isn't it.

Surely that depends on the make up? No make up is definitely better than bad make up.

I don't mean full face of make up but just some sort of foundation or powder to even out your skin and maybe a small bit of mascara and lip gloss. If you know how to do your make up well you would never look worse with make up on.

@PurpleDaisies yes 100%, bad make up is definitely worse than none. Sorry I should have worded that better

I cross posted with you there @WeDontLikeCricket

@WeDontLikeCricket

I don't mean full face of make up but just some sort of foundation or powder to even out your skin and maybe a small bit of mascara and lip gloss. If you know how to do your make up well you would never look worse with make up on.

Nope, foundation and powder just hide my glowing complexion.

I have fabulous skin why would I want to spoil it with weird unnatural stuff on it?

I wouldn't go so far as to say that you must think a lot of yourself to not wear make up, I just think that they are happy with themselves and that's that. It could be said that people who really go all out think a lot of themselves to bother with all the extra faff.

Once more, with feeling: you are allowed to think a lot of yourself. It isn't a crime.

@BertramLacey

I’ve a friend that used to say “ how much must you think of yourself to to NOT wear make up and think you look great!?”

What's wrong with thinking a lot of yourself? I don't wear makeup, I look fine. It's not a crime to think like this. Being a woman doesn't mean you need to go around listing all the bits you hate and covering them up. I eat well, don't drink much alcohol and avoid too much caffeine. I drink plenty of water. I do these things to stay healthy.

Makeup or no makeup, it's not a crime to think you look amazing.

I agree!

There is nothing wrong with thinking that I am look fine just as I am. In fact, it's probably a sign of healthy self esteem.

It's funny really, on this thread, women who don't wear make-up or engage in intensive grooming regimes are simultaneously being told that they must lack self-love and have poor mental health (because it's equivalent to a man not showering ); but that they are also probably vain and full of themselves.

I just think that I'm acceptable in my clean natural state. I keep fit, eat well and look after myself etc. for my health and general wellbeing, and that does also have an impact on how I look. But that doesn't extend to thinking that I need to spray myself a different colour or conceal/alter parts of my face.

I’ve a friend that used to say “ how much must you think of yourself to to NOT wear make up and think you look great!?”

In fact, upon re-reading it, this is one of the most depressing statement on this thread.

It basically says that women SHOULD listen to all the companies and media outlets telling them they are a pile of shite, and that if a women somehow manages to escape the constant cycle of self-loathing and self-alteration that is expected of them, she should be judged harshly for it. She must be a terrible person who "thinks a lot of herself" (the worst crime a woman can commit).

Men who don't wear make-up aren't judged to be vain, terrible people. Of course not. Because penis.

Fuck that shit.

I look after my skin, am very lucky to have good genes, I don't have anything to cover with foundation. I wear vit c to give me glow so definitely wouldn't cover with powder.

It seems to be a shocking statement but I like my face. I'm happy that I now feel confident enough to wear no make up and be happy. I still do make up now and then and I find it really fun, love lipsticks... but I find it liberating not feeling like I need to.

I work from home and have done for years. Until lockdown I would wear make up every single day but I only do it now if I know I need to pop out or someone is delivering something. I shower alternate days, put coconut oil on wet skin after and then Avon Soft Glow which doesn’t tan exactly but looks better than milk bottle white. Shave legs armpits bikini line once a week. My hair is curly dry and frizzy so I use low shampoo (it’s amazing) followed by wet hair serum. I straighten sometimes but usually just put it in a ponytail or clip it up.

I don't wear makeup. It does transform some people but I'm not one of them. I had a professional make up done for a black tie event and while I thought it looked nice it didn't look so good as to make me think wow when I looked in the mirror.

Just because.

@WeDontLikeCricket

I don't mean full face of make up but just some sort of foundation or powder to even out your skin and maybe a small bit of mascara and lip gloss. If you know how to do your make up well you would never look worse with make up on.

Makes you wonder why men don’t all wear make up, if it makes everyone look better.

Soap, water & sun cream in the sun for 55 years and I feel fine about myself. I see women with all that is described and think it's too much like hard work

I wash hair every day (it look greasy otherwise.) Put a bit of make up on and maybe shave legs once in a while.

ZZtop - some men do though. It's just personal preference though isn't it, what one person finds attractive another doesn't. Some men like made up women some men prefer natural. There is another thread at the moment talking about hairy/non hairy men.

I don't see any harm in people doing lots to help them look/feel better or people doing nothing at all. It's really no ones business but for some reason there are many women on here who believe that women who shave or make an effort are only doing it because they feel they have to adhere to social 'norms'. That is genuinely not the case for me personally.

@WeDontLikeCricket

ZZtop - some men do though. It's just personal preference though isn't it, what one person finds attractive another doesn't. Some men like made up women some men prefer natural. There is another thread at the moment talking about hairy/non hairy men.

I don't see any harm in people doing lots to help them look/feel better or people doing nothing at all. It's really no ones business but for some reason there are many women on here who believe that women who shave or make an effort are only doing it because they feel they have to adhere to social 'norms'. That is genuinely not the case for me personally.

Well indeed. People on this thread seem to be perfectly capable of saying that men can look just as good without make up, yet incapable of saying the same about women.

A woman who doesn't wear make up is judged with either

'she can't be bothered, lazy cow'

or

'she thinks she looks so amazing that she doesn't need to bother with make up - arrogant cow'.

While men don't bother and no one judges at all.

@WeDontLikeCricket

ZZtop - some men do though. It's just personal preference though isn't it, what one person finds attractive another doesn't. Some men like made up women some men prefer natural. There is another thread at the moment talking about hairy/non hairy men.

I don't see any harm in people doing lots to help them look/feel better or people doing nothing at all. It's really no ones business but for some reason there are many women on here who believe that women who shave or make an effort are only doing it because they feel they have to adhere to social 'norms'. That is genuinely not the case for me personally.

I love to wear makeup and get my hair done etc. There is nothing wrong with enjoying looking nice or getting dressed up. However, due to media promoted 'social norms' there is an overwhelming trend for women (and some men) to value themselves based on looks alone which has a negative impact on how they feel and behave. I know 9 year old girls who have already judged themselves as needing nose jobs and lip fillers! Some girls won't put their hands up in class because they don't want people to look at them. Women don't go for job interviews because they feel too big. People cancel social engagements because they are worried how they will look. The whole beauty industry is, at best oppressive, at worst dangerous.

Do whatever beautifying routines you want (I admit that I have since about 12 years old!), so long as it gives you genuine happiness rather than just chasing false ideals you'll never reach.

Body positivity is about realising that you are amazing regardless of how you look. Your worth is not defined by it.

ZZtop - I do agree, just because my personal opinion is that I think someone may look better with make up, firstly doesn't mean I am right and secondly doesn't mean I judge or care. I prefer men who make less effort (other than cleanliness), I like rougher looking manly men, it's just my taste.

My skin is ok without makeup but I need to paint on my brows, grey as a badger now and look alien without. I wear mascara top eyeliner (liquid) and a little white in the inner corner near my tear duct to make my eyes look fresh and some pink lipstick. But if I'm going out I like red lippy and a smoky eyeshadow, still dont bother with foundation though. I could carry off the no makeup till I was midd 40s but my confidence needs a little boost now.