In thinking being a SAHM is work?

[morepizza]

Work is defined as:

noun
noun: work; plural noun: works; plural noun: the works
1 1. 
activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a purpose or result.

I think this includes SAH parental duties. I know a lot of people don't agree with me. What else would it be called?

@Shirleyphallus

It’s work but it isn’t a job or a career. It’s also a real luxury to be able to dick around from home looking after children than the mental graft of a proper job

Are you aware of how much that comment makes you sound like a judgemental prick?

It's the hardest job ever but you're not employed

There are many many more jobs more mentally and/or physically challenging than looking after your kids!

@morepizza your logic about nurseries makes no sense. Your implying that being a SAHM is harder than having a job so people get jobs instead and use nurseries. If this was true then everybody would use nurseries and SAHM’s would not exist .

Some people can’t afford to work due to childcare and many single mums could not stay at home. Some people would enjoy being a SAHM and for some it would drive them crazy.

Thsi stupid argument has been done to death.

Depends if kids are all at school. If they are it’s a lot easier. If you have a cleaner, it’s also easier. But yes I don’t deny that there is work involved, picking up kids, homework, shopping, cooking dinner etc.
But if kids are at school then certainly easier than working outside the home. That’s my experience anyway.

I'm a sahm. . Dh considers it as work and always says how he'd never cope lol

I didn't imply anything.

But you can't work and look after your children at the same time.

If this was true then everybody would use nurseries and SAHM’s would not exist .

We are a dying breed

@morepizza well ok. The world changes all the time .

It isn’t the hardest job ever .

Teaching a class of 31 EYFS kids was much harder than being home with my own kids! I’m sure there are plenty of other people out there who would also say their job was harder. Other people might say theirs was much easier. No job is ‘the hardest job in the world’ -it’s all relative and different people find different things easy.

It’s still not a job.

I would say yes it’s work. Work doesn’t require payment e.g. charity ‘work’ and school ‘work’, house ‘work’. You’ll hear people say I’ve got ‘work’ to do to the garden. It’s all about graft isn’t it?

Lots of things are work, sorting out a holiday is hard work, gardening is work, washing the car is work. That is different from a job though - that is a different sort of work - paid work. With no flexibility and the rules dictated by other - v different

I didn't say it was paid work. Just that it was work. Hard work!

Yes it’s work but in the sense if the verb “I am working at this,” rather than the noun I’m going to “work” - ie a paid job.

But this shouldn’t mean it is devalued. It has more far more value than many / most jobs individuals find themselves doing, let’s face it.

Although I agree it’s not ‘the hardest job ever’ in regular circumstances. I was a SAHM for a little while, my current paid job is much harder.

It's not "work" because no one else values it enough to pay you do to do that and only that.

I would agree with you that it is akin to work when at home with more than 1 under 4/5. But a SAHP with all children in preschool/school? No, not work.

OP is there a reason why you've chosen to re-hash this age old argument?

Has someone belittled your choice?

Bit depressing really. During the week I work (at my very stressful job). At the weekends and in the evening I have "time off" to relax, where I look after DC and catch up on all my housework. I'd rather that my time off wasn't work, semantics aside, it doesn't usually feel like work.

It's hard work for a short period of time. It's not as hard work as some jobs though. And I agree with PP that other people have jobs and have to do a lot of what you are calling work - that's even harder

@WorraLiberty

OP is there a reason why you've chosen to re-hash this age old argument?

Has someone belittled your choice?

Yes.

Loads of things are hard work. Gardening, home renovations, sports, lots of hobbies etc

It's definitely more boring than work though - that's the only reason I found it hard - it was brain numbing

That is a fatuous argument
No it's not. If women didn't have child care they wouldn't be able to work outside the home. Minding children is work whether they are yours or someone else's and whether you're getting paid or not.

I'm still agog that this poster thinks raising children doesn't require mental graft.

Of course it does, I didn’t say that.

But plenty of us have jobs outside the home and also raise children. The mental graft of a job is much more challenging than that of being with your own child

Why don’t you tell us what happened? What has someone said to and it what context?

If someone said to me, ‘does your SIL work?’ I would reply, ‘No-she qualified as a nurse, but is currently a SAHM’. Is it that sort of thing?

@ShirleyPhallus

I'm still agog that this poster thinks raising children doesn't require mental graft.

Of course it does, I didn’t say that.

But plenty of us have jobs outside the home and also raise children. The mental graft of a job is much more challenging than that of being with your own child

Depends on the job though doesn't it.

The mental graft of looking after a child doesn't ever end, unless you're a parent who doesn't really give a shit.

Working for yourself may incur the same amount of mental graft, but working down Asda surely won't.

Would you also class a job like teaching as 'dicking about looking after children'?

Just curious.

@kurtney no, teachers and childcare professionals are amazing and undervalued IMO. It’s very different hanging out with your own child, who you love unconditionally to looking after multiple children on a forced syllabus being underpaid and not being thanked for it