To really hate DH working from home?

[manysummersago]

I’m sure I’m not the only one struggling with this.

He is sat in the dining room 830-6 every weekday. He seems to take more space than he actually does.

I hate feeling that he’s listening to everything I do and say. It just feels like I can never just be!

I hear you, op. My OH does a bit of both. I don't like it when he's home, which sounds awful, but I like peace. He is very kind, never leaves the kitchen a mess, helps, etc, but I find it claustrophobic. I was trying to watch the tennis before and he was going on about something. Or nothing!
The other day, he left for work, my son left for a meeting and my granddaughter toddled off to school. When it dawned on me I was on my own, I did a little dance in the kitchen.

@Skysblue

I hear you OP. Mine works in a study upstairs. Ought to be fine. But he is talking loudly on calls ALL day and the house never feels peaceful. Plus I can’t yell for my child to come because his colleagues will hear me, my child can’t play with friends in his room upstairs cos he’ll be heard on calls, etc. But the bit that reeeeeally gets me is when I’ve finally cooked kids’ breakfast and pasta & veggies for packed lunch, walked child to school, walked back, cleared everything in kitchen, put laundry and dishwasher on and sat down for first time in 3 hrs, at which point DH will inevitably appear, dump a load of dirty cups and laundry around kitchen, then wander off muttering ‘I wish I could sit around doing nothing all day’

My DH works in a separate room and I still hate it. I liked having the house to myself. Instead I have to hear him booming away on his endless calls. Plus it looks like WFH will be permanent for him so I'll never get my space back again.

YANBU OP

I hear you OP
But not for DH who worked at home before Covid and we had very good rules about it and we do have our own work places.
It's the kids - they can't get after school place so are at home with a nanny and they just constantly interrupt ME not him.
Even when I have said 'hello' and even when their needs are met. They are normal, well functioning 8 and 10 year olds.
Today I was on two mega important meetings and they interrupted both. To give a kiss...

I went back to the office to escape and it was bliss and then someone got Covid and I had to self isolate 😡

I think really you're pissed off because you can't sit around in your pj's all day eating crisps and watching crap telly.

Your own words.

Er yes, and?

...and it's quite hard to sympathise with that?

I mean, it is his home and I'm guessing he is contributing financially to it's upkeep, the family expenses etc but the poor sod's not welcome even though he's not stopping you doing what you need /want to do.

Of course it’s his home. No one is suggesting he has to be permanently out of it, but there are extremes.

The comment about eating crisps was lighthearted but DH doesn’t get a bad old time. He gets the house to himself every day, lots of rest at night, time to pursue hobbies should he want to. And I even contribute financially too

@Sillawithans

I think really you're pissed off because you can't sit around in your pj's all day eating crisps and watching crap telly.

Your own words.

Sounds amazing. ML should be that too.

I totally get you. DH works instants in his "office" ie the box room. I am self employed so although I work part time I am often catching up on the computer when at home or doing housework. I hate it, he is always "there", I feel like I can't have the radio on loud or have friends over for coffee or just sit on my arse and read. I can hear him on the phone or doing zoom calls. He gets annoyed when the postman comes or a parcel
and the dogs bark. We are converting the shed to a home office soon so I'm hoping that helps!

@tinkywinkyshandbag converting the shed sounds like a great idea!!

He might say that he’d like the place to himself sometimes too!
But OP, as someone who likes their own space, I feel the same way and am relieved that my other half and I work different times so we both get a little bit of peace.

He gets the place to himself every single day!

DH went back to his office a couple of months ago after over a year of working from home. The house is much quieter and calmer now and I much prefer it.

I usually work full time but am on maternity atm. I love it when DH works from home. It's nice to have someone to talk to over lunch and to make me every other cuppa.

Don't get your complaint about wanting the house to yourself at all. What do you want to do there that your husband's presence prevents?

I get it op

I work part time and I love my days when I'm
Alone in house then covid happens and now he is here ALL the time.

I hate it.
It's just that feeling of freedom
Is gone

He is now going back to office every Thursday which is wonderful!

Have you read my threads op? My DH has been working from home since last March. I hate it. Its not my home anymore. Can't watch any TV or just be by myself. Constant zoom meetings etc. Just go back to the office ! I hope your situation improves 💐

I agree, it's really annoying, especially the loud phone calls

Omg the phone calls

Oh god yes my friends were here the other day and he popped over to chat

Bugger off this is my time.

Urgh. It's shit.

I don't get why you can't sit around eating crisps in your PJs while your husband is in the house.

Has anyone developed a bad case of misophonia? I think I have got it after a year of being in a v small house.

@manysummersago

The problem is that I never have the house to myself. But never mind.

Oh I hear you!! Same issue with my DH, tbh. He has the office upstairs, but still he comes down to "make a coffee" when I am busy doing stuff in the kitchen. Had some colourful language over these last 18 months!

MareofBeasttown YES!!!!!!

He does have to go in to the office though every so often and I revel in that. Get house all to myself 🙂