To think dd should save half of her wages?

[cagesnflowers]

Dd14 has her first summer job. She earns about at least 150 a week (175 will be the max in the height of summer!)

I think she should be saving at least 50 a week if not half,
Dh disagrees and says to leave her be. She's only 14. She will be babysitting most weekends though so she will earn a bit more with that!

Aibu? Wwyd?

What does the hypothetical £75 a week have to cover?

That's great, congrats to your daughter!

I'm not sure about 50% though I don't see why not if she doesn't need it. What would the money saved be for, or just to help her out later in life? Is there anything big she'd like to save for that you could use as an incentive, like if you save 25% a week you could have X in ten weeks, if you save 50% you could have it in five?

I really wish I'd got into the habit of saving as a child, I still struggle with it now in my 30s!

@1988Username her phone credit and whatever else she wants really. Fun money I suppose.

Her money, her choice. She’s the one earning it and has to learn financial responsibility. By all means sit and discuss with her and see what she’s thought about but ultimately it’s nothing to do with you, it’s her decision

I think part of getting your first job and earning your own money is having responsibility for deciding what to do with it. Her money her choice

I think you should allow her to do what she wants. This is a great opportunity for her to use her own initiative and forward planning. You can suggest some ideas, but leave it to her! It's her money

@PorkPieForStarters I suppose I'm thinking she might use some at Christmas to buy sibling/parents gifts or if she decides she wants a new phone or just to have money there in the winter months that is just hers.

It’s none of your business. How will she ever learn how to manage money unless you allow her to do so?

What are the savings meant to be for?

Generic 'future'?
Something big she wants in a couple of years e.g. driving lessons?
Something big she wants soon e.g. an xbox?
To top herself up over winter when she isn't earning?

TBH she should do what she wants at that age. As a parent you should be covering all her reasonable expenses and if she's working hard its a nice time of life to enjoy the disposable income.

Fine to say she needs to pay board, or contribute to costs i.e. dictate expectations from you, but i don't see how you're helping her by randomly coming up with a 50% figure for saving.

Surely it's up to her to manage her own cash, and this is an excellent training ground to do it?

For what it's worth, i'm excellent at managing cash - i always had clear expectations around "£X is expected for board", the rest was mine to handle.

DH had parents like yours - dictated what every penny was spent on even when he got his first job. He's fucking usless with cash, to the point where he finds it stressful. It's like he never learned to deal with financial decision making on a small scale, and cannot handle it (despite being very confident and capable in other adult ways) with a proper salaried job. It literally causes an extreme anxiety reaction.

You aren't helping your DD by micromanging using arbritary rules like this. She "should" be told to develop her own financial skills.

Butt out, i'm with your DH on this one.

What @YellowFish12 said

@YellowFish12 at no point did I say the money was for me! I provide everything for my dd she's only 14 ffs! Read my posts please!

The best thing she could possibly do is fritter all the money away on tat and then in a couple of months when she realises that if she’d saved it she could have had an “X” and then regret it.

As she will then learn something that many people don’t learn until they are well into adulthood. (Often in massive credit card debt.)

I'm thinking she might use some at Christmas to buy sibling/parents gifts or if she decides she wants a new phone or just to have money there in the winter months that is just hers.

What, if you tell her to do it?
Or you tell he she's decided to do it?

[quote cagesnflowers]@PorkPieForStarters I suppose I'm thinking she might use some at Christmas to buy sibling/parents gifts or if she decides she wants a new phone or just to have money there in the winter months that is just hers. [/quote]
If her presents from siblings/ phones will be funded by you then hers should be too. She’s only 14. This money needs to be saved with only a small amount used for spending. She can then start to operate a budget from 16-18.

She’s young to be saving I think, let her enjoy her wages.

You want her to save 50% of her money so she can buy her siblings / parents Christmas presents

Don’t get me wrong, I think encouraging her to save a proportion of her earnings for her future is a good thing, and with that level of wages she wouldn’t be going without much if she did save half, but the reference to presents is throwing me.

I can see where you’re coming from and I think it’s ok to talk to her about it and remind her she won’t have that level of income in the winter. but ultimately I’d leave the decision up to her

It's her money and up to her what she spends it on. Yes, she will have things to pay for when she gets older - but she will also have more than £150 a week when she's working full time, so that's fine. It's unlikely she will spend that much anyway.

She's working, and to want to work at 14 shows a strong ethic already, so just let her enjoy this first bit of money she's got.

I strongly think she should be saving half. When kids get their first job, up to when they start having to contribute (either at home, or in a flat share etc), they often have the most disposal income they will ever have in their lives. In some cases, the most. You are not being a parent to your daughter if you let her think this is normal or develop a taste for it.

I followed what had been done for me, and sat down with my children and explained the breakdown of costs that normally come from a wage, in percentages. This shows that rent, utilities and transport (3 things i and they got for free from my parents), would be at least 50% of the pay cheque. We then talked and agreed that they would themselves save 50% of their pay cheque in a separate high interest savings account, to go towards ‘something’ in the future. In my case, I caught the bug and with continual saving from 14 onwards was able to pay all my spending money for university from the interest, still leaving me with the lump sum I had build from 14 onwards when I started work. Interest rates aren’t paying like that now, but one child used theirs for a car to take to uni, the other is still going.

Other parents may say pay rent/board, but at this age (14) I think it is too young. You want them to learn to save due to the benefit for them, and taking it doesn’t help.

Consider reading /buying her the Barefoot Investor book for families?

I think I'd just sit down and have a chat with her, as this is quite a reasonable sum for a girl of her age to be earning each week. Ask her if she's thought of saving some, and maybe suggest a figure, but I wouldn't insist she saves at this age, as she might feel that you're taking away the independence she's gaining by working, and that it's not really worth doing if you're going to dictate how she spends or saves the money she's earned.

I think it's good parenting to encourage saving, so that she has money to do nice things in the future, when she might not be earning. She can still have plenty of fun at 14 with £70+ of spending money per week - that's more disposable income than lots of adults have!

I think encouraging her to save £50 a week is a great idea. Obviously it's her money, so she doesn't have to, but it's a great way to learn about managing money & then she'll have some money to spend later when she needs it and her summer job has ended.

It will go into a bank account so she'll be able to decide how quickly to spend it.

If you pay for presents from her siblings to each other/you and would pay for new phones for them then it’s not fair to expect her to use her wages for that, she’s still at school.

I would encourage her to save some but more so she has extra cash in a few months for things she wants like any particular clothes or things you don’t pay for. Other than that she’s 14, I’d just let her enjoy it for now.