To think dd should save half of her wages?

[cagesnflowers]

Dd14 has her first summer job. She earns about at least 150 a week (175 will be the max in the height of summer!)

I think she should be saving at least 50 a week if not half,
Dh disagrees and says to leave her be. She's only 14. She will be babysitting most weekends though so she will earn a bit more with that!

Aibu? Wwyd?

@roobicoobi

Similar experience to a PP. I paid my parents board and had responsibility for the rest.

When you were 14?

I'm pretty good at budgeting because of that.

I never paid a penny in board and am also good at budgeting.

Think you've misunderstood the point I was making. I'm good at budgeting because I was left to be responsible for the rest. I wasn't saying it was paying board that made me responsible, though I don't begrudge my parents that.

Board was at 15 rather than 14 but It was a minimal £10 when I had my first Saturday job and £100 per month when I got my first full time job (an apprenticeship at 16).

I think op the issue here is there is something discomfiting about the way you’re eyeing up her money, I think that’s why people are responding as they are

If you’d said I want to talk to her and encourage her to save a little, talk about things she’d like. But she’s 14 and don’t want to pressurise her , the answers would be different

But “I want her to save half and she should enjoy giving gifts, including to me” with her savings just feels off. You seem really bothered by how much she has and as a pp said, it does sound like you have more than an opinion, you wanted to get in there, control it and get something for yourself and her siblings out of it, like it was a windfall you should all share.

I wouldn't dictate or express the 50% part but perhaps would encourage her to save and mention that with her earning so well you won't be pitching in for extras the rest of the year? Eg cinema visits, primark crap, the next game for nintendo switch or whatever. So she can plan ahead and know to save some of her income (maybe even mention driving lessons for when she's 16?).

Otherwise £600-700/month PLUS babysitting money is A LOT of money at 14. I'd perhaps even tell her she can use it to pay her own mobile phone bill going forward (depending on how many months work this entails)?

I think you’re way off base @Bluntness100 I don’t think the OP comes across like that at all. £600 is a huge amount of fun money for a teenager let alone one who’s only 14. Unless they live in an incredibly expensive country half of that would still leave plenty for fun & frittering. I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with expecting her to fund little gifts to her siblings / parents. I doubt anyone’s expecting diamonds. I can still remember Christmas shopping in London and buying my mum something with money I’d earned myself and the good feeling that gave me. I don’t think she necessarily needs to save half and I might not say anything the first month but probably help her with some information about modern online savings accounts available for her age and discuss the opportunities this money will give her that she might not currently have.

@Divebar2021 then we need to agree to disagree as I think you’re way off base.

You could offer a steer but really it's her money.

I think saving to buy something for herself is good rather than just saving.

I worked all summer fruit picking to buy a much coveted radio cassette recorder! This was the late 70s though

Think you've misunderstood the point I was making. I'm good at budgeting because I was left to be responsible for the rest. I wasn't saying it was paying board that made me responsible, though I don't begrudge my parents that.

Yes I misunderstood. I definitely thought the 2 were connected.

Mine have to.

50% to blow on what you like. 50% goes into savings account that you can't access til you're 18. It feels a good way of learning that when you start working your net wages aren't ALL for blowing on what you like.

I don't have £150 spending money a week to blow - so it feels unrealistic to let a teenager get used to living the high life before reality sinks in. Half your weekly wages is plenty to spend.

Lots of envy of disposable income here!

Very few 14 year olds will have a job over the summer. So this is the perfect opportunity to learn. Assuming its a 6 week summer, she's going to be earning at least £900. Does she have a savings account linked to her current account ? If its easy to move money from current to savings she's more likely to do it.

I'd advise she saves some, possibly up to half, for things she wants over Christmas/winter, particularly if its unlikely she'll get work at other holidays and that there will be lots of events happening over autumn /winter she might want to have saved for.

But then leave it to her. She will learn herself when she has an amazing summer wardrobe, but no nice winter clothes, or wants a new phone or to go to a gig when the reopen in September and the money is gone.

Next summer she may have learned the lesson and be more frugal.

Are many of her friends working this summer? If she's the only one with money, that also might make a huge difference. Its easier to save when you have much more coming in than friends and do their cheap days out.

No let her spend it. When she gets older life is boring and consists of saving etx.

Also how has she got a job at 14. With no ni number

@Christmasfairy2020 we are not in the U.K.

@MargosKaftan yes pretty much all of her friends are working too.

When I was this age I had a little budgeting book, with a pie chart setting out how I aimed to spend my money. "Gifts" was definitely one of the segments of the pie chart, but it was not 50% of it!

What will happen once the summer is over? Will there be pocket money, or just babysitting money? No harm in setting this out now, so she knows what to expect, but it really is up to her whether she saves or not.

I would use this as a learning experience. Advise she saves. Advise she might want to think before the summer if there's something big she'd like to save for - eg new phone, new branded rucksack, new coat for winter etc, or if she wants to have a pot saved incase there's something she suddenly wants in the future, and set up a savings account linked to her current account, but let her decide herself how much she wants to save.

This is great that she has a chance to learn herself without it having really any negative effects if she screws up and wastes it all.

@Christmasfairy2020

Also how has she got a job at 14. With no ni number

You don't need one. Rather than cast doubt maybe research yourself?

I'm going against the grain here but I'd say encourage her to save.

I have always worked (from Saturday jobs at 14 to working in the city now in my 30s) but it took me a LONG time to realise the importance of saving and budgeting.

I'm truly wish I had learnt to manage money/savings from the very very start - I frittered so much away in my 20s it's shameful. It's really my only regret in life .

She might need to learn the lesson herself too, but advising her early on can only help? good luck

I agree saving £50 pw is a good idea .Its difficult for girls of 14 to think about saving! Too much temptation! Still good that she has a little job .

It's not your money so not your choice

@JeepersCreeping you think it's OK to charge a 14yo board? Did you forget they're a child?

I think you should have a conversation with her and explain why you’d like her to save and help her to come to an amount. No 14 year old needs £150 a week and she’ll appreciate the money over the winter. Well done to your DD for getting a job though, so many teenagers don’t bother these days. Can I ask what she is doing? DS is desperate for a job, he’s only 12 so it wouldn’t be possible but he’d be happy if there was something he could do in 2 years time.

It would be awful to charge a 14 year old board though like some PPs have suggested!

@LadyCatStark we live in a seasonal tourist town with a fairground so she is working there. Some of her friends work there too and others work in a few b&b's doing housekeeping.

I can't actually believe you would expect a 14 yr old to save half of her wages so she can buy you and her very much younger siblings Christmas presents! I am staggered by this.
Her money at this age should be entirely her own to do as she pleases with. Do the younger children get her a Christmas present (funded by you?) If they do, then you should pay for her to get a present for them. She is still a child.
My 15 yr old has a job and I wouldn't dream of trying to control what she does with her wages.

I'd be insisting she saves a good part of it. Either that, or else if she is earning so much, she could contribute to household expenses - how many adults have £175 a week to spend on themselves? I'm sure if given that choice, the prospect of saving it for a bigger purpose (a holiday, a new computer/phone/whatever) might become more attractive.