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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think neighbours having parties in their gardens should have some consideration for neighbours?

241 replies

Bbq1 · 12/06/2021 22:09

Couple next door but one are in their sixties and in the last few weeks have had "gatherings" in their garden that have gone on until at least 2am. The houses are semi detatched so gardens have shared fences and the houses also back onto other gardens. Before anyone leaps on me, I am all for people having fun but not at the expense of everyone around them. They back onto a house with young children and are direct neighbours to a family with a young child. Today, they started a really noisy party in their gardens at 2pm that appears to have about 30plus people present so despite the babble of noise, singing, shouting etc I thought "Fair enough, it's afternoon, no problem"... It's STILL going on 10 hours later. They are singing and laughing at the absolute tops of their voices, chanting football songs etc. I have had to shut my windows on a warm night and turn the TV up really loud to drown them out. My ds has shut his windows but they can still be heard up there despite that. Ds heard a young child crying no doubt disturbed by the noise. The absolute selfishness of it just gets to me so much. I just want them to give a little bit of thought especially to elderly neighbours /those with children /neighbours in general and maybe have the kindness and intelligence to quieten down now. Aibu?

OP posts:
KatieB55 · 13/06/2021 15:32

I'm currently listening to football at full volume from neighbours, with associated shouting and cheering. I just want to read my book in the garden in peace!

SappysCurry · 13/06/2021 15:38

@lynsey91

Nooooooo
Not Cotton Eye Joe

I thought that had been scraped to the farthest bowels of bad memories and unfortunately you have reminded me now

You poor thing 🤯

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 13/06/2021 16:31

Why not just rock up with a bottle and join them?

I've been on MN since it was all fields, and this is effortlessly, hands down, the most fascinatingly terrible suggestion I've ever read on here. Possibly anywhere.

Because OP doesn't want to.
Because they don't want her to.
Because OP has perfectly good plans of her own, and doesn't want to drop everything in order to play manic pixie dream girl for some knobbers who don't deserve to be humoured.
Because regardless of whether they said yes or no, she wouldn't have a leg to stand on if she ever needed to complain in future.
Because if they just told her to fuck off, it would be the single most mortifying event in the universe.
Because even if they said yes, it would still be pretty mortifying to be a sober middle aged woman nursing a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon in the midst of a crowd of wankered 20-something blokes who don't know her from Adam and have no interest in being her mates.
Because work, childcare, sleep, etc etc.
Because COVID is still, yanno, a thing, and young people are more likely to be a) unvaccinated b) asymptomatic c) disinclined to follow the rules, particularly when shitfaced.
Because we live in the real world and not in your kooky, kerrrrazy imaginary alternate universe populated by charming rogues wiv an 'eart of gold who love nothing more than an impromptu street party with foaming tankards of home brewed ale and a singalong round the piano.

I could do this forever.

Bbq1 · 13/06/2021 17:09

@JesusInTheCabbageVan

Why not just rock up with a bottle and join them?

I've been on MN since it was all fields, and this is effortlessly, hands down, the most fascinatingly terrible suggestion I've ever read on here. Possibly anywhere.

Because OP doesn't want to.
Because they don't want her to.
Because OP has perfectly good plans of her own, and doesn't want to drop everything in order to play manic pixie dream girl for some knobbers who don't deserve to be humoured.
Because regardless of whether they said yes or no, she wouldn't have a leg to stand on if she ever needed to complain in future.
Because if they just told her to fuck off, it would be the single most mortifying event in the universe.
Because even if they said yes, it would still be pretty mortifying to be a sober middle aged woman nursing a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon in the midst of a crowd of wankered 20-something blokes who don't know her from Adam and have no interest in being her mates.
Because work, childcare, sleep, etc etc.
Because COVID is still, yanno, a thing, and young people are more likely to be a) unvaccinated b) asymptomatic c) disinclined to follow the rules, particularly when shitfaced.
Because we live in the real world and not in your kooky, kerrrrazy imaginary alternate universe populated by charming rogues wiv an 'eart of gold who love nothing more than an impromptu street party with foaming tankards of home brewed ale and a singalong round the piano.

I could do this forever.

@JesusInTheCabbageVan this is brilliant and is a perfect response to that ridiculous suggestion.
OP posts:
Meruem · 13/06/2021 17:23

All those people saying we’ve been locked down for over a year. Well most of the shitty neighbours we’re talking about ignored that anyway! The ones near me still had loud parties all summer long last year. You wouldn’t think they’d even heard of Covid. So it isn’t “letting off steam” after lockdown with these people (I could understand that), it’s their normal behaviour.

Rosebud21 · 13/06/2021 17:25

STFU after 11pm, & take it indoors, people in their gardens who think they're 'talking quietly' at 3, 4, 5, 6am in the morning, you're not, it's frustrating & annoying to those of us have to get up & work the next day

Lilibet2022 · 13/06/2021 18:10

Thankyou @JesusInTheCabbageVan for responding so eloquently. My idea of sitting in their sex pond with a bottle of rose is my idea of hell. I don't want them to be my bezzie mates. Just be courteous to others.

Lilibet2022 · 13/06/2021 18:11

Sorry their idea of sitting round there. They're awful people. I don't want to associate with them. At all.

MintyMabel · 13/06/2021 19:49

Children playing in the garden at 8am for a few hours (although personally I'd not let mine out until 9am on a weekend) is very obviously not the same as large number of adults and children a music system which continues all day long until 2am. The latter is MUCH louder and stops people sleeping during hours when most of the neighbohood will be in bed. Are you seriously telling me you can't see why one is just part of having neighbours and the other is massively inconsiderate.

Children playing out in the garden is an every day thing. And some find the noise that brings really disrupting and irritating. In both circumstances it is inconsiderate.

HarrisMcCoo · 13/06/2021 20:12

@Lilibet2022

Why not just rock up with a bottle and join them?

Because most of us have work in the morning...

Or the school run and nursery run to get on with, as well as shopping etc etc.
HarrisMcCoo · 13/06/2021 20:17

Would I f*CK want to drink with my neighbours 😂 can't stand them.

Lilibet2022 · 13/06/2021 20:24

@HarrisMcCoo yes sorry I should have included all of you who have school runs and errands etc to run in the morning.
Not that it stops my sex pond twat. After keeping all her neighbours awake she dragged her Foster yes you read that right DCs to school bright and bushy tailed the next morning. Poor bairns looked bloody knackered.

lynsey91 · 13/06/2021 20:25

[quote SappysCurry]@lynsey91

Nooooooo
Not Cotton Eye Joe

I thought that had been scraped to the farthest bowels of bad memories and unfortunately you have reminded me now

You poor thing 🤯[/quote]
Not only do I have to put up with him playing it endless times a day, I now have it playing in my head over and over.

I keep changing it to another song but it creeps back! I think I might have to kill him

Lilibet2022 · 13/06/2021 20:28

@lynsey91 pop baby shark on whilst doing breakfast tomorrow a bit too loud accidentally on purpose. Grin

SappysCurry · 13/06/2021 20:40

@JesusInTheCabbageVan

Sorry if this sounds weird but you are my hero and I am in awe of you

SappysCurry · 13/06/2021 20:52

@lynsey91
Same here I’m unhappy to report
Cajun style hoedowns belong in the Waltons as far as I’m concerned
But ultimately I blame you for it 😂

I feel a fave tune on continual loop for about an hour might do a cerebral irrigation 🤞

Bbq1 · 13/06/2021 21:19

[quote Lilibet2022]@lynsey91 pop baby shark on whilst doing breakfast tomorrow a bit too loud accidentally on purpose. Grin[/quote]
Oh god, my neighbours would love that, no punishment there as they were belting it out at the top of their lungs last night

OP posts:
JesusInTheCabbageVan · 13/06/2021 21:33

@SappysCurry 😘

Valenciaoranges · 13/06/2021 21:47

My neighbour swore at the football so I shouted tol him to stop it and he did. Must have gone inside to watch it like a normal person.

GoodforMonica · 13/06/2021 23:39

There's a petition to make noise nuisance a criminal offence: petition.parliament.uk/petitions/559394 It would be great to see the law changed to improve things for those who suffer from noisy neighbours all summer long.

Womencanlift · 13/06/2021 23:42

The problem with that petition is that what is classed as a nuisance is subjective.

To me someone mowing their lawn while their kids screech at 8am on a Sunday morning is just as much a bloody nuisance as music being played at midnight but on MN it’s just part of suburban living

Lilibet2022 · 14/06/2021 12:20

^Oh god, my neighbours would love that, no punishment there as they were belting it out at the top of their lungs last night
OP’s posts^

@Bbq1 Grin sorry. They sound awful and possibly related to my sex pond twat.

flapjackfairy · 14/06/2021 12:48

@Lilibet2020
Report her to social services or whoever she fosters for anonymously. That is awful. Having sex within ear shot of kids even if they are in bed would be a huge safeguarding trigger not to mention all the other stuff.

Weareallvirgins · 14/06/2021 17:35

Just do what i do. 11pm call 101 and get the police to knock and send Everyone home. Simple effective and discreet. 11pm is a curfew for noise in gardens im led to believe. @Bbq1 they normally turn up in half hour patrol cars always bobbing about and bang on the front door like "the coppers"

Jeannie88 · 14/06/2021 17:47

GrinGrin

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