Should partner top up lost tax credits?

[greenorangeblue]

To keep it brief, my partner of three years moved in to look after me after a major op. I've got one teen ds.
I've stopped my wtc, which was approximately £600 a month.
Finances are separate. He was earning £45,000 when he moved in. Now has another job earning £25,000.
I'm se, earn about £12,000.
I pay the household bills, approximately £350.He buys the food, about the same amount. (House owned by me outright).
Should he be reimbursing me my lost wtc? Some of it? All of it? Thoughts please?
I'm feeling a bit hard done by tbh but don't want to fleece him. I sometimes think why should I be worse off because he moved in? Or am I being a money grabber?

@LakieLady the OP is S/E.

So in theory, she could earn more.

You don't seem to see this person as a partner in any way. You're making a choice to live with him, therefore you lose wtc - you are free to choose the wtc and ask him to move out. It is beyond belief that you would consider asking him to reimburse you for lost benefits.

When my husband lost his job we got nothing as we had to audacity to have recently sold our flat so had a deposit sitting. So we lived off £1200 a month that I earned as a nurse leaving a 3 month old baby at home. We weren't entitled to anymore than £75 a week job seekers for a 24 week period. To pay £600 of rent, all other bills and feed a family of four.

So yeah it does leave a sour taste in my mouth when someone owns a property outright complaining about 'losing £600 a month' of money that they get in surplus to their salary.

@Summersnightdream

I wonder if the posters talking about how they never 'moved their boyfriends in' are aware of the tests that are actually involved with deciding if they live with you. It's not cut and dry whether they love in your property. Things such as having meals in your house, staying over, holidays together, whether your family and friends consider you a couple etc are all indicators you are in a relationship. Therefore if you were investigated and they found some of the above to be true, you could be prosecuted for tax credit fraud. It's really not the case of 'oh my boyfriend doesn't move in so I keep reaping tax credits'.

I've only represented a client at a tribunal on a cohabitation case once.

The evidence that the tribunal were most interested in was where the partner kept their clothes and personal belongings. That seemed to outweigh the fact that they spent all day, every day, and some nights,
in the same house.

They asked about all the other things, but the location of the claimant's stuff was, in their eyes, the compelling thing.

The council's fraud guy (it was a housing benefit matter) was very experienced and hated my client, so I'm sure he would have gone to the upper tribunal if he thought their weighing of of the evidence.

If u don’t want him their ask him to leave. Though it sounds like you do want him there but only if you keep your wtc?

Not a dig at the op but what have we come to where a person would choose to stay single just because of a few hundred quid. Society is well and truly broken and it is all down to money.

Not so much why should you be worse off because he moved in but why should you get tax payers money because you want your lover living with you..

@greenorangeblue
If anything, your partner should be paying 1/3 of all household expenses (utilities, food, sky tv, etc) and you should be paying 2/3 (for you and your son)

If the real issue is that you don't want him to live with you, say thanks for helping me when I needed it but can you move out now?

if youre not planning on combining finances, and you are worse off if he lives there, then seriously consider living apart, because it doesnt make financial sense. The tax credits are assuming that someone moving in will be supporting you financially. Theres no sense in leaving yourself short. Youre down £150 a week. Thats a lot to lose

Lots of people on benefits cant afford to move in with a partner. Doesnt help the housing crisis, but couples living together are seen as a financial unit, so yes, i think you do need to discuss with him the fact that youre now worse off

You might cost less in that sense but you are hoarding vast amounts of money in the equity your houses are accruing vastly in excess of the inflation rate

How is keeping a roof over your head "hoarding vast amounts of money"? The OP has a home, that she lives in. If she sold it, she would have to buy another home, or rent. And if she spent the equity on rent, she'd soon have to claim even more in benefits. And the money would end up in the pockets of landlords, who would be hoarding it.

There's no guarantee that house prices will continue to rise. The value of my then home fell by 43% between 1988 and 1991. Prices fell by 20% in 2008/09 and didn't recover to their pre-crash value for 5 years. If it's happened before, it can happen again. Personally, I don't think the current rate of house price inflation can continue.

And the OP would be sacrificing her security. Renting privately, which she would have to, she and her child could be forced to move if the landlord wanted to take back the property for any reason.

The value of the home you live in has been disregarded for benefit reasons ever since I can remember. If that were to change, the impact on homelessness would be huge.

Where he was staying and what he was paying previously is irrelevant, you wouldn't of stopped your WTC, they would of stopped it for you after you informed them that a partner who is earning now living with you, presumably you were only getting WTC because of reduced hours and for your DC, it's hardly your partners fault in this case, you can ask for him to subsidize your lost WTC or he can move out and you can get it back again

@Getawaywithit

how fucked is our benefits system that someone can get £600 a month from the state when they own a house outright?

Ah yeah, forgot, homeowners don't have living expenses, don't have low incomes, don't have children in childcare etc. etc. etc.

Sure, she could sell it. And then what when they money's gone?

I'm in the US. But my mortgage is around $850 per month for a 4 bedroom house. If I had to sell, of be praying 1200+ for a 3 bedroom apartment. Definitely worse off

No, I’d expect you to find more work if recovered and don’t need care.
Paying his half fine, paying more because you earn less or don’t work as much definately not.

You get £600 free money from the government if you live separately?

You probably won't answer and nor do you have too but my question would be, if you have such low bills of £350 a month, where does the rest of your money go?

Yes I know life isnt free and it all gets spent somewhere days out, house stuff ect.

But do you even need the £250 loss from him? For what? Or do you just want it for the sake of him giving it to you?

@Mumnets

You get £600 free money from the government if you live separately?

OP is presumably a single parent. So yes, tax credits are there to top up the incomes of those who are raising children alone on one salary. So give over with the "free money" comments.

Good God, the attitudes of some of you. It's not mathematically sound, so most of it is pure prejudice.

We know next to nothing about the situation, except that the OP has clearly been very unwell. No longer having to rely on a carer does not equal fit to work full time.

To answer the question, social benefits are calculated on household income, based on minimum amounts necessary to get by. You (rightly) haven't combined access to finances, but you should have fair access to funds. His moving in shouldn't leave you with less money. You should probably sit down with a calculator and work it all out to see how your respective situations compare, both with each other and with how things were before. If you've lost out and he's gained, then no, that's not fair and he should make it right.

But if you don't want him there, you should just resolve that.

Yabvu op

I think if you've taken him on, then he needs to contribute more to the household, you are not being unreasonable OP.

You don’t think a lot of him do you? 🤷‍♀️ When my DP (now DH) moved in with me I was actually worse off as my tax credits and housing benefits stopped but it would never have crossed my mind to ask him to sub me. Our money was joint from day one anyway.

When my DP (now DH) moved in with me I was actually worse off as my tax credits and housing benefits stopped but it would never have crossed my mind to ask him to sub me. Our money was joint from day one anyway

Lol. You think you’re so much better than the OP yet freely admit you joined finances. You were subbing each other!

OP ad her partner are not sharing finances

@AmyFl

I think if you've taken him on, then he needs to contribute more to the household, you are not being unreasonable OP.

This makes it sound like the man is some sort of project! He moved in to help with her care needs.

The OP seemingly doesn't want him there anymore and should tell him.

@Jent13c What a daft attitude. Your husband lost his job and so no one is ever allowed to be miffed at being almost a grand a month worse off unless they're also going to be imminently homeless. I guess misery does love company.

@HotChocolateLover You just said he joined finances so it was a totally different situation! AIBU is full of such daft commentors. The other day someone asked about whether a partner should pay rent and everyone was up in arms at the idea someone would move in and not pay rent. Yet OP is amoney grabber for wanting to ot be worse off.

Surely bills and expenses should be split 50:50.

You’re the lower earner, but also have a teen son. He’s the higher earner. Splitting all the bills equally seems fair to me (although you buy clothes etc for your son)