Constant need to buy stuff is getting me down

[zoomzoom68]

I seem to need an endless stream of stuff and it’s starting to get me down.

Just a few examples of things I’ve bought this week:

• Tent to take baby on beach for our upcoming holiday to protect him from the sun (£30)
• Five colourful plant pots for plants that a friend dropped off unexpectedly (£15)
• Cool bag, again for upcoming holiday (£15)
• Decorations for baby’s upcoming 1st birthday (£15)
• New chopping board for kitchen as old one finally broke (£10)

I know these things sound like one offs, but it seems to be every week that I need something unexpected like this. Does anyone else find the same?

I’m also trying to sell some old baby stuff including a carrycot, but have had no takers on FB or Schpock. Not sure where else to try?

It just feels like we slave away to make enough money and then spend it on an endless stream of stuff... and on and on it goes!

But you didn’t need to buy any of those? None are essential? Especially birthday decorations- you could make those very easily.

Those plant’s won’t last if you’re going on holiday, so you can save your money there.

None of that sounds essential.

Not a single one of those things needed to be bought so I don’t really see your point.

I understand and it just gets "worse" as the kids get older (need xyz for project tomorrow/new school shoes/etc.)

However in your case if finances are tight is that all necessary? Does a 1 year old need £15 of decorations? A packet of balloons would be fine.

Holiday expendutures are kind of part of the holiday - will you get use out of the cool bag again?

Could you borrow things? (We borrowed a friends travel cot for going away.)

Similarly fb marketplace. Places like the range/wilko. There are ways of reducing costs.

But yes to the mental energy just organising life with kids takes...

Completely agree. £15 here, £20 there, some petrol and I've spent nearly £100 in just normal stuff. Not really exciting or anything just needed. People will be along to say the plants could go in plastic pound land ones but then they'll look rubbish and they were a gift. Baby stuff, cool bag is needed. A friend of mine is always on fb selling stuff for literally 50p, £1-2 but I don't have the time or headspace for that, staying in for it to be picked up etc.

£15 on decorations for a birthday they won’t remember?

Other than the chopping board it all seems a bit unnecessary. Beg, borrow, buy second hand.

And when people bring you unsolicited plants (a pet hate of mine), just give them to someone else.

I’ve had three children and never owned a sun tent.

Unless the plants were literally delivered as bare roots, they had adequate pots already.

My cool bag and current chopping board were both less than a fiver.

1st birthday decorations? Give your head a wobble.

I don’t see the problem. Cool bag & beach tent will come in handy. £15 isn’t much for decorations. You will use the chopping board.

Unless you’re absolutely skint there’s no issue here.

Where do you shop? I think you could probably have got much of this stuff cheaper. Have you tried bargain-hunting (places like B&M Bargains, the Pound Shop, TK Maxx) or going second-hand, e.g. eBay or looking in charity shops for things like plant pots?

You spent £15 on decorations but if your baby is only one, he/she isn't going to be old enough to appreciate them, so that was probably unnecessary - I hope you went for generic 'birthday' that can be reused rather than 'first birthday'.

Also. Decorations, no noone will die without them but if you're having people round to celebrate, which again, OK, isn't NECESSARY, but is a fairly normal and nice thing to do, then a little bit of an effort is also normal. It's that line between not being utterly skint like can't afford the bills and just wanting little bits that make working hard feel worth it.

Most of those could be bought second hand/cheaper from supermarket.

I do get what you are saying but it's down to personal choice, you don't need decorations, cool bags are £5 in supermarkets etc

chopping board. and cool bag..ok
decorations..are they reusable if yes..ok if not unnecessary. .I had cloth bunting given to me I reused for years

pots ..nice to have but but not entirely necessary

I don't know where you are shopping but it is too expensive. You can get all those items so much cheaper.

You're buying unnecessary crap, and it's brand new when you could be sourcing second hand.

Track your spending for a while and see how much of it is on junk

I do get your wider point though. In the last two weeks we’ve had

£600 clutch repair on one car
£200 door handle repair on the other

£15 new trainers for the youngest as they suddenly went into holes

£180 tile came off the roof

??? Fence poles need replacing as fence is swinging in the wind.

So I do get it. But none of your stuff was at all essential.

But you didn’t need to buy any of those? None are essential?

Surely a beach tent IS essential for taking a baby on the beach in full sun though?

I mostly bought all this stuff from Amazon as it’s quick and easy.

Will I ever get to the point where I have everything I need or will it always be like this? I’m guessing the latter!

Chopping board is essential!

My DC never had a pop up tent for the beach!
Parasol, hat and blanket draped across the buggy was enough. £30.- saved.

Cool bag you might need, but it should last quite a few years!

Chopping board there are cheaper options on the market. (Not sure how you can break one?)

Surely the plants where already in pots...

No need for birthday decorations... or get less / cheaper ones.

I get you. I wish I could just not buy anything but there's always something and it takes not only money but time and headspace to shop. And I know I'm lucky to be able to make small purchases like that.

I totally get you. And I agree with the poster who said it gets worse as they get older.

I don’t know if girls are slightly more expensive? Tights, sanitary towels, make up....hair products.

I hope I’m at peak expense. Also saving for them to go to university.I feel so financially drained.

beach tent so not essential!

Your problem is your idea that you actually need this stuff.

@zoomzoom68

Bloody Amazon.

You could have borrowed a beach tent, rather than buy new.

You could have bought a second hand one, probably barely used, from Facebook marketplace or gumtree.

Instead you've supported Amazon and all it's questionable business practices to buy a piece of plastic that will probably be used twice at most, then sit in your house before sitting in landfill long after you and your children have left the earth.

Glad it was quick and easy

I totally get what you mean, its the lack of control of your budget. I would suggest buying baby stuff off ebay or at mum to mum markets when they reopen, that way the spending will be cut and you can sell or redonate so what youve spent can be recouped or seen as a sort of hire for the time you needed it.
Facebook groups are a good way to buy and sell items (not marketplace) where i used to live our local selling site was very active and you could buy tonnes of different things on there