Constant need to buy stuff is getting me down

[zoomzoom68]

I seem to need an endless stream of stuff and it’s starting to get me down.

Just a few examples of things I’ve bought this week:

• Tent to take baby on beach for our upcoming holiday to protect him from the sun (£30)
• Five colourful plant pots for plants that a friend dropped off unexpectedly (£15)
• Cool bag, again for upcoming holiday (£15)
• Decorations for baby’s upcoming 1st birthday (£15)
• New chopping board for kitchen as old one finally broke (£10)

I know these things sound like one offs, but it seems to be every week that I need something unexpected like this. Does anyone else find the same?

I’m also trying to sell some old baby stuff including a carrycot, but have had no takers on FB or Schpock. Not sure where else to try?

It just feels like we slave away to make enough money and then spend it on an endless stream of stuff... and on and on it goes!

you can always get plant pots cheaply
we never had a beach tent but you've got one
the decorations were totally ott
chopping boards can be bought cheaply

OP, YNBU, I would have got the things you’ve mentioned (although I’d have gone somewhere cheaper).

Beach tent- is a must in my opinion, we got ours from a carboot for about £20, and used it twice a year on the beach for about 10 years (it used it to store clothes/shoes/phones once the children didn’t need it), friends would borrow it when they went away and we used it in the garden on hot days and then sold it for a fiver last year. We also didn’t use pushchairs on the beach as people trying to pull pushchairs through sand look awful- way to hot and bothered!

Chopping board you could have got for £1 from a cheap shop.

Cool bag, with kids you’ll get your monies worth. We got one 14 years ago and still use it, we go on picnics every weekend in the summer, use it on holidays and as long as you look after it, it’ll last years.

Decorations, I only ever buy balloons as my kids always made their own decor, paper chain type things. For babies I wouldn’t have bothered but when mine were younger I wasn’t on social media which I think changes things.

The constant need for things doesn’t stop but I will only buy in cheaper shops now to cut down the cost.

you should shop in cheaper places op, even amazon!

I agree with other posters that Amazon and one click buying makes it easy to spend.

However I have a sun tent, really darn useful it is. Used every year for our holiday and then any odd beach days that happen. I have various cool bags obtained over the years, each serving a different purpose, including a rucksack style which is so much easier for a day at the beach then a carrier bag.

Plant pots / chopping boards, yep are needed and will last but again, Amazon is the downfall.

Birthday decorations - like others I have a stash that come out every year, but I have never gone for helium balloons every year etc (only for 13 birthday and will for 16)

I am one of those annoying people who buy things and put them away, so my tent and cool bag were bought end of season in the sale, just takes a lot of forward thinking.

Too many on here think everyone uses something on e and chucks it away, we don't all do that.

@ToooOldForThis

I think the OP is getting an unreasonable pasting! Maybe I've missed it but nowhere has she said she's really struggling financially? If that's the case then maybe all these knit your own beach tent out of 2nd hand lentils type of suggestions are helpful. But if not, then I totally get your point OP. I think we've changed the way we live too, and things that help us live more practically/comfortably in own homes and gardens start to seem more necessary

I think the issue is that she's classed all of these as 'needs' when with the exception of the (relatively expensive) chopping board they're actually all 'wants' - and many of them for a holiday which is also quite a nice thing to have.

I would buy a lot of the same stuff, but would never have the gall to go and complain about my luxury spends when there are so many people even in this country and certainly in much of the world who couldn't spend any of this.

Sorry typo- Beach tent should have read as £10

no way should a chopping board be £10

FB marketplace is your friend
Beach tent - choice of several £8-10
Plant pots - free -£5 masses of choice in colours and sizes
Cool bag £0-5, could buy a brand new Thermos one for £12. Masses of choice
Birthday decorations - masses of choice, free
Chopping Board (less choice here as I'd prefer to buy wood or plastic new), but glass £0-2

Obviously that's on Marketplace.
However if I need something, there are very local pages where I can ask 'Has anyone got a surplus....'? and invariably someone will pop up and say 'Yes, come and get it / I'll drop it by' Or I want to get rid of something - hideous pink kids cushion (unwanted gift) the other day, gone & collected in 20 minutes.

Those things - apart fron the decorations- will last you years unless you are the sort of idiot who will throw the beach tent and cool bag away at the end of the holiday. I do think you have spent more than you needed to if you had shopped around a bit or even borrowed things.

DH buys stuff - absolutley incenses me because he doesnt' deal with the stuff once it's bought - just lets it gather in the cupboards, on the shelves. I have taken soooo much stuff to the tip over the years. And we almost fill our rubbish bin each fortnight - we are in our early 70s so we have accumulated trash at that rate for say 45 years. The plastics just to lie about the planet for centuries. (ok some is properly recycled now but it's still on the planet). AAAAAaaaaa! annddd breathe.................

@rookiemere

Slight diversion but our wooden chopping boards only last a couple of years as they get black discolouration at the edge. Maybe I should be cleaning it differently?

Let them dry properly on a rack before you put them away. I’ve got a wooden chopping board I bought from Woolies about 20 years ago and it’s still fine.

I do get what you mean OP. I’ve had major repairs done in my bathroom, so it was then painted. So now everything I had looks grubby. Needed a new blind, shower curtain, ended up getting a couple of decor bits. It all adds up.

I actually put myself on an amazon ban for a while because I got into the habit of ordering something every week. I think amazon is fatal as you can always find something you think you need.

Jeez there are some miserable arses on here.

A beach tent for the baby is a great idea! Not only does it give them a shady place to nap if they get overwhelmed and tired, it's a slightly less sandy place for nappy changes. They can also use it as a play tent in the garden. You'll be using it for years and years.

Birthday decorations, completely agree with posters who say buy something you can use again and again. We have a birthday banner my friend gave me when dd was 2yrs. She's almost 18yrs now and we still get it out every year (and for mine, dh and ds's birthdays), if we didn't, there would be an outcry. If you buy some fabric bunting next time you can just string that up every year and just buy a packet of balloons which is pennies.

The chopping board you bought is a pricey one so you can't moan about that one! Plant pots are a luxury, up to you if you want to spend money on that sort of thing, I have a collection now of plant pots (from plants I've killed over the years!) so I don't have to buy a new one if I get a new plant.

So basically you will get up a stash of some things you can then avoid re-buying. It's worth spending a little more on something you can use again and again and much better for the planet too. The luxury bits around the edges are up to you.

Children are bloody expensive though and have an annoying habit of growing so they constantly need different things for their age and bigger clothes. Little b*ggers. It's even more fun when they are teenagers and they eat enormous amounts of food, their clothes are £££ and their longed for items are £££££££ rather than a £30 Lego set. Can't remember why I had them really

My friends and I pass on the rainbow coloured happy birthday bunting between us as the kids’ birthdays are spread out.

I set a time limit- say 15 minutes to check on fb/gumtree etc or research prices for something like the beach tent. It’s not worth spending hours trawling online but I can often find it secondhand in 15 minutes.

Don't buy on amazon. I find it really hard to navigate to get the best prices and it has algorithms to make you spend a bit more. Always cheaper to buy in local supermarket while doing food shopping, or if you have charity shops, eBay, more of a make do and mend attitude rather than buying things with an instant click. But yes, i find it rather depressing!

I wouldn't have bought any of those things, even if money wasn't tight. I can't abide "stuff" for the sake if it.

Tent, I'd have made do, managed to find shade one way or another, put a towel over the pram and kept covered with clothes. I wouldn't take a baby (or me) on a beach all day anyway.

Plants I'd have managed with what I have or said no thanks for the plants if I didn't want them or had nowhere to put them.

Cool bag is just a nuisance to carry. Come away from the beach at lunchtime. See also shade.

I've never decorated for a birthday party, it wouldn't even cross my mind for a 1st bithday, who cares? All that money and resources for things to be used for part of one day.

Chopping board, never urgent. I use a plate more often than not anyway because it goes in the dishwasher more easily.

I think people are getting caught up on the specific examples.
Op your issue is Amazon is too easy so you pay premium and it's too tempting to add in extra stuff to the shopping basket and press click.

Disable Amazon for say 3 months, make lists of what you need and try to buy them locally or at supermarkets/DIY stores etc. Chances are you'll cross stuff off the list before you buy it, find cheaper options and sometimes just not bother because it's less convenient. It's a good way to break the one click habit.

Honestly the best buy on your list is probably the beach tent. Yes they weren't around 'in our day' but they're brilliant and we still take ours on holiday and our kids are 14 and 16! They're great for keeping your food cool and for DH to whip his trunks on out of sight 😉

When your child is young there are going to be purchases like a beach tent (if youre a beach person) and cool bag that will get some years use out of.

No doubt the eco keyboard warriors are telling you a baby only needs one muslin for all decorating/ Sun protectiom/ clothing purposes from birth to five and they don't even know how to spell Amazon because they don't know there are shops outside of charity shops!

You can find great stuff second hand. For selling, when they restart, I'd suggest something like a boot sale or nearly new sale in person. I do buy second hand so prefer to get a good look at the wear / damage as unfortunately online a lot of people price unrealistically and lie (just like the no no a sun protecting shelter can't be necessary for a small child brigade).

grin at the fill bottles of water with ice and put in a carrier bag is so funny. Not sure this poster spends much time on a beach. They will be incredibly heavy to lug and melt in about three minutes

When my children were small and I was skint sandwiches were wrapped in the beach towels/spare clothes in a carrier bag with chilled or frozen drinks and stayed fresh for ages. No extra weight and no bulky cool bag to cart about. We spent whole days on the beach, which we accessed by walking/public transport.

@Iminaglasscaseofemotion

I don't think that sounds that bad. Would love to know what you're supposed to make decorations out of 🤣, notay people have glue and card and pens just lying around unless they have older children, even then I would struggle to scrape that stuff together, and let's face it, who's got the time or patience for that? Of course you want tobsecorate for your babies first birthday. Do people really not do that? Chopping board, pretty essential if you don't want your worktops wrecked ( could have been cheaper but if you have the money 🤷‍♀️) Pots will do for more plants for years. Who keeps them in the horrible plastic pots? Tent and cool bag will also last for years, and you can use the tent in the garden etc. Sure you will get more than one use out of them.

Exactly this! For goodness sake the OP was giving examples of additional spending that everyone has, even if you personally wouldn’t buy plantpots the point that OP was making is that there is always something extra to buy or procure and I agree. Ok, maybe she could have got a chopping board elsewhere cheaper but not everyone has IKEA or Poundland on their doorstep.

I agree OP, there does always seem to be something coming up unexpected to buy, especially with growing children. I usually make a list and then buy a few things as I go, sometimes that ‘must have’ item actually then drops off the list, so my advice would be to not always buy everything you think you need straight away.

I think you need to get out of the habit of thinking to need to buy something to meet every new circumstance. Would you have bothered with any of this if you'd had to get the bus into town to buy it?

But that is why you work, isn’t it? So that you can buy things you need and want? Like, that’s literally the point of money.

You can make choices about what and how much you buy, of course, and if you aren’t happy with your choices, start making different ones. But I don’t really get why you seem to begrudge being able to spend the money you earn. That’s what it’s for.

You're trading affordability for convenience.

For a lot of things Amazon will only stock higher priced items.