Constant need to buy stuff is getting me down

[zoomzoom68]

I seem to need an endless stream of stuff and it’s starting to get me down.

Just a few examples of things I’ve bought this week:

• Tent to take baby on beach for our upcoming holiday to protect him from the sun (£30)
• Five colourful plant pots for plants that a friend dropped off unexpectedly (£15)
• Cool bag, again for upcoming holiday (£15)
• Decorations for baby’s upcoming 1st birthday (£15)
• New chopping board for kitchen as old one finally broke (£10)

I know these things sound like one offs, but it seems to be every week that I need something unexpected like this. Does anyone else find the same?

I’m also trying to sell some old baby stuff including a carrycot, but have had no takers on FB or Schpock. Not sure where else to try?

It just feels like we slave away to make enough money and then spend it on an endless stream of stuff... and on and on it goes!

@DifferentHair Calm down 😂

I much prefer the tent to a parasol! Are you shopping around for the best deal? Cool bags are quite easy to come by - lidl usually has a range.

@zoomzoom68

Parasol, hat and blanket

I don’t have a parasol either! Beach tent is still eligible for return so I could do that and get a parasol. I just thought the tent would be easier with the baby?

The plants were in small pots but will grow rapidly so needed repotting.

pots are the type of thing you can easily get on freegle or Freecycle. ..In fact lady in my road had loads outside her house free to take. ..yes it's not as easy always as amazon but it's very possible

I get you OP loath these sort of purchase as we are also on a tight budget but I would search the whole house for things I could use before having to splash out.

For example birthday decorations. We re-use these for most birthday so you could save yours until next year.

If you had cool bricks in the fridge/freezer I would have put these in an ordinary bag instead of buying the cool bag.

I bought a full sized pop up tent when my DD was a young baby that we could take to the beach if needed but she plays in it all the time now as a toddler so it was a one off purchase. If I didn't want to fork out for a tent I would have got it from freecycle/Facebook etc.

Slight diversion but our wooden chopping boards only last a couple of years as they get black discolouration at the edge. Maybe I should be cleaning it differently?

I use cheap plastic chopping boards from Poundland or IKEA and put them through the dishwasher 🤷🏼‍♀️

Would love to know what you're supposed to make decorations out of 🤣
DD’s first birthday in lockdown one, essentials shopping only. So: cut bunting flag shapes out of cardboard boxes, painted them with odds and sods paint from shed, strung them up. Used them again for second birthday.

OP, I’m guessing you have Amazon prime? DP is like you, “Oh, I’ll just pay for the quick option” and doesn’t think about things til they’re upon us.

Pots you could have had loads for free from Gumtree/Freecycle/Marketplace/etc. Decorations you absolutely could have made - paper chains, bunting - or gone without; they’re entirely unnecessary and I can’t remember a single childhood birthday where we had them. Shade tent: we have one, it’s useful. Few quid off eBay. Etc.

Yes, you can keep spending and accumulating and going “Oh, I can get this delivered tomorrow, therefore I need it”. Or you can reset your habits now and every time you’re about to spend £15, put it in savings instead. And stop giving money to bloody Amazon.

The best thing I bought for birthdays was a length of Happy Birthday bunting (Book people) and a "Birthday boy" badge. Still using them at age 17! Be non age specific.

I do think the sun shade etc is actually essential.

And I think £15 is reasonable on decorations. I've probably spent around £30 just on decorations for my sons 2nd birthday next month sourcing Hey Duggee decorations.

I do not have the time to make decorations, nor do I want to.

pots are the type of thing you can easily get on freegle or Freecycle.

I think like previous posters said, it’s finding the time to hunt round for stuff when Amazon is one click and it’s delivered. The irony is I work long hours to make the money, have less time as a result and so buy more expensive stuff that I need money to buy!

Will I ever get to the point where I have everything I need or will it always be like this? I’m guessing the latter!

The latter I'm afraid.

Beach tents are pretty essential in my eyes, you can eat your lunch in there without getting dive bombed by the seagulls for one.

Unfortunately babies do run successively through things: clothes, shoes, toys, equipment. Try to get from second hand and then sell/donate it back into the system. Can you manage with a beach umbrella that will be useful in future?

I get it. And it is so easy to click and buy now. For my more 'impulse' type purchases online I now tend to save to favourites or create a list and then revisit.

Ref your recent purchases - the tent. You should get years out of it. Even though mine are in their teens we still use the one we got when they were a toddler - as a den, reading nook, shady spot. Cool bag ditto.

I think the problem arises is when you already have a cool bag etc and buy another one, just because it's a trendier colour or shape.

I think these things go in phases. Stuff conks out and needs renewing, just when it's a birthday, holiday, car mot/tax time etc

I wouldn’t have bought the tent if it wasn’t for the baby. But am really worried about him being in the sun for too long and getting burnt.

I get your point, there is a constant drip drip of expenses. Last week it was trainers and school shoes for my eldest. This week youngest needs a sun hat and I need some toiletries. You could perhaps have reduced how much you paid for specific items but there is always something.

@Arbadacarba

The tent is essential

Is it, though? I'm fairly sure such things didn't exist in my childhood and I don't remember mass outbreaks of sunstroke/sun burn. And my childhood included the 1976 heatwave!

I do!! I had sunstroke more than once as a child. The causes of skin cancer were less well understood then too. In fact, DM used to put tanning oil on especially to tan in the sun, rather than to prevent it! I think beach tents are a very sensible idea. Used one when my dc were young. Cost about £5 from IKEA, lost track of how many times we used it. Many, many times! Also used it in the garden and on picnics.

YAB a bit U to start a thread complaining about having to buy things for holidays and decorations for your baby's birthday: some people really struggle with money to buy things that they actually need, like food and clothes

No she isn't because if your apply that logic barely any threads should exist.

I think most posters have pointed out you can get things cheaper elsewhere.

I recently got birthday decorations form Asda, one was paper bunting shaped like balloons - it’s lovely so I’ve left it up and I’m sure it was only a quid! I also have a generic card happy birthday banner that goes up for each birthday.

I recently got a beach tent from the range for £25, perhaps not essential - but really bloody useful. I’ve got it up in my garden atm. My last one lasted 3.5 years and was used every summer. It only broke because we had unexpectedly bad weather and it got trashed

Enjoy your holiday and little ones first birthday!

@PixieDust28

I do think the sun shade etc is actually essential.

And I think £15 is reasonable on decorations. I've probably spent around £30 just on decorations for my sons 2nd birthday next month sourcing Hey Duggee decorations.

I do not have the time to make decorations, nor do I want to.

But did you then post on MN to complain about all the money you’re spending on things you “need”?

FWIW I'm still using the baby beach tent I bought 14 years ago. It stores all our stuff when we're swimming.

I'm not saying beach tents aren't a good idea, BikeRunSki just that they are not, strictly speaking, essential.

I try to buy most things second hand, saves a fortune but trawling sales listings etc takes time.

We did use a small sun tent when DD was smaller, it was brilliant then but isn’t really much use now she’s mobile. If yours is a big enough for adults too, you’ll get years of use out of it. Cool bag will be useful too.

Birthday decorations are a waste of money and bad for the environment - I get the same old “happy birthday” banner out every time and we even reuse candles - tbh it makes me cringe when I see a photo of little one plonked in front of a ridiculous spread of presents, cakes and decorations

Take the cool bag back and buy a freezer bag from aldi or lidl. A carrier bag with silver on the inside insulated. Costs about £1.25
Look second hand or just don't bother with some stuff. The tent for example, you can easily make a shade for a baby with a towel.
I'd say the only thing you needed was a chopping board.

What you have to do is start saying no. No I'm not doing it.
Me and DH started saying no to all the stuff we needed a couple of years ago. none of our family ever had savings, but we do. So much extra money saved from literally not buying crap.

What you did here is a good idea, working out how much money you spent on rubbish, we worked out that we spent nearly £200 on takeaways one month and it really took the shine off of takeaways.

Definitely keep the beach tent OP, it will be a thousand times easier trying to manage the baby and the sun/sand/feeding/changing/everything with a tent than without

You didn't need to buy decorations for a 1 YOs birthday, WTF? Plant pots totally unnecessary, you could have refused the plants, given them away, put them in the composter, or bought or asked around for cheaper pots - any gardener will be overrun with basic pots because you just acquire loads of them. You didn't have to buy nice expensive ones.

Coolbag will always come in useful, it will pay for itself in no time if you use it to take more food and drink with you instead of paying convenience store and attraction prices. I'm surprised you don't have one already, given you've run your own household for long enough to have at least one DC and wear out a chopping board.

Everything you bought, you could have got for about a third of the price in Ikea, Wilko type shops or supermarkets. But you should expect to spend some money on 'sundries' so you should include an allowance in your budget for this.

But if you don't want to spend this money, you need to stop and think before each purchase. There's a good Moneysavingexpert 'tool' for this. Think about whether you really need something, can you repurpose something you already have or get the thing for free, can you find it cheaper, that sort of thing.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/family/stop-spending-budgeting-tool/