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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Chairs given away have caused damage, who should pay?

303 replies

FirstNameSurname · 03/06/2021 10:01

Last year I was given a dining table and due to lockdown I brought the cheapest chairs online to make the table usable. I used them all year for homeschooling, meals etc they have been well used. Metal legs are a bit rocky etc so I went shopping now we can and brought replacements.
Chatting to a friend I mentioned mutual friend was helping me take a load to the skip. Friend asked what I was taking and I said the chairs. Friend asked for the chairs. I explained they were a bit grubby and rocky and were the ones I got last year cheap online so didn't think they were worth the trip to hers for her to then need to skip them soon. She said she still wanted them, so I dropped them off to her about 3 weeks ago.

This morning she messages me to say the chairs have cut circles in the lino. I apologised and said that I was sorry I should have just skipped them when I planned to. She has come back saying I should have known and shes not happy. I called her and explained that on my tiled floor it wasn't something I noticed. Shes replied it was the tiles that have caused the plastic ends to push into the leg exposing the metal leg and caused the problem. Just as I said my goodbyes she said "well you'll need to replace the lino before I move out else you'll need to give me the money I loose on my deposit" and hung up. I've text to say she asked for the chairs knowing they were in a poor condition so I can't give her anything to replace the lino. Shes now blocked me.

So who should pay?

OP posts:
Backtomyoldname · 04/06/2021 20:55

I bet its from the back legs and caused when someone leans back on the chair and twists.

We had this problem with stools in school on a lino floor - the chair legs wore through rubber buffers until we put 1p coins in the bottom of the buffers.

I don’t think its your responsibility.

CookieMonsterMunch · 04/06/2021 21:00

CF

Kokosrieksts · 04/06/2021 21:02

No! This is not your fault. You can easily bin this “friend”. Don’t even entertain it.

cherish123 · 04/06/2021 21:32

Not your problem. She should have checked. You wanted to take them to the skip.

BlueButtercups · 04/06/2021 21:38

Did you tell her to get lost.

Ilovecharliecat · 04/06/2021 21:49

CF of the highest order

Rowofducks · 04/06/2021 21:50

Not your problem. I once gave an old mobile to a “friend” who a month later text me demanding money for a new one as she had snapped the charger in it. She even threatened to send her son round to get the money off me for giving her a dodgy phone. What pissed me off even more was my ex went round to sort things out and paged her money for a new one. Angry

Bananahana · 04/06/2021 22:08

She’s off the charts!!!!

Usernamerequired · 04/06/2021 22:30

Of course the chair legs would leave circles in lino 🙄 she should have known that and seen it after first use. Even playing with toy cars on lino can leave marks. Linoleum now seems to have a cushioned backing making it softer and easier damaged, my fitter even told me not to use stools or a step ladder on them. Needs to put a mat down and get over herself-maybe stop looking for a handout. Ikea sell lovely chairs at £5 each

Usernamerequired · 04/06/2021 22:39

£3 on ebay for these furniture leg floor protectors. Hard lesson for her to learn but not your problem

Chairs given away have caused damage, who should pay?
Original poster
FirstNameSurname · 04/06/2021 22:56

I've had an update via mutual friend. She is upset that I told her about some of the issues with the chairs but "held back" info that I should have known about. Its not dawned on her that I didn’t know so she feels lied to. She seems to think she was doing me a favour and its back fired on her. Mutual friend said that I hadn't known and asked how she was helping me out as I already planned and booked a skip slot? Her only response was that she would never have given me something that would damage my home and is hurt I have done that to her. I also have to pay if I ever expect to be unblocked Hmm

She knows that I don't go back after a blocking/unfriending as I think the whole concept of blocking friends or friend clearouts people use to do facebook only to refriend straight after is ridiculous so she knows I'll no longer communicate with her on the platforms shes blocked me on.

Looks like I could never have won. If I refused to give the chairs she would have been pissed and in giving her chairs I should now keep responsibility for them forever.

OP posts:
marton4710 · 04/06/2021 23:16

Of course you should not pay. You were up front and honest and it was her choice. Please don’t lose any sleep over it. You sound very kind hearted and that is what matters

CorianderBee · 04/06/2021 23:33

You gave her free items you said were skipworthy ... she should have inspected them. Not your problem at all it's not like you sold her them

Mumsbagels · 04/06/2021 23:41

Just out of interest has she ever shown any signs previously of being off her rocker? She sounds utterly nuts

BillyTodd · 04/06/2021 23:41

she's bonkers.

HelpMeh · 04/06/2021 23:45

Oh just admit it OP, you set out to ruin her lino from the off! Grin

She's clearly gone completely mad. I think I'd be quietly pleased about the blocking.

MarySlater · 05/06/2021 00:15

You're completely unreasonable. Of course you should pay and also pay her some more for administrative time, for hurt feelings too.

Nah I am joking, she's not right in the head

Billybagpuss · 05/06/2021 06:37

She’s very full of her own importance isn’t she, you have to pay if you expect to be unblocked!

expatinspain · 05/06/2021 07:49

That's one of the most piss taking things I've ever heard! Friendship over. Anyone who would treat their friend like that isn't any kind of real friend.

spacegirl123 · 05/06/2021 08:33

@FirstNameSurname sounds like you've had a lucky escape!! She sounds unhinged. That's one less nutjob in your life to worry about, I'd treat it as a blessing if I were you!

But also seriously I hope this hasn't caused you too much anguish, especially if other friends are being dragged in too - I'd just stand your ground and let it blow over, she'll never see how unreasonable she's being but that's not really your problem 🤷‍♀️

Usernamerequired · 05/06/2021 12:37

So your ‘friendship’ is being held to ransom now? Well she’s shown her true colours now. Theres probably a history of this nonsense. Better off without her 😊

osbertthesyrianhamster · 05/06/2021 12:43

Fuck her off! Batshit, emotionally abusive cow. I'd block her back so if she reverses her decision she finds herself block because you do not need people like this in your life at all for any reason. Just no.

Tzimi · 05/06/2021 13:25

Silly woman, she could have got some inexpensive rubber ferrules on eBay. I recently bought two 25mm ferrules for £3 for my step stool which had a similar problem, and they are fine! Much cheaper than a new piece of vinyl!

JudgeJ · 05/06/2021 15:30

@Tzimi

Silly woman, she could have got some inexpensive rubber ferrules on eBay. I recently bought two 25mm ferrules for £3 for my step stool which had a similar problem, and they are fine! Much cheaper than a new piece of vinyl!
Upwards I said how I'd puut a 2p coin in each of the ferrules to stop the metal wearing through them, works a treat!
londonscalling · 05/06/2021 15:35

She's a CF. Just move on!