To think my friend doesn’t want me as a bridesmaid because of my size...?

[Dandylioness1]

One of my very close friends got engaged a few months ago.

We’ve been friends for a long time and over the years she has always made references to me being a bridesmaid when she gets married.

This afternoon she tagged 4 friends on Facebook
introducing them as her “team bride”.

I felt really upset about it, but still, I messaged her to say congratulations on the team bride.

She replied saying she really wanted me to be a part of it but it wouldn’t have been right for me.
I replied asking her what she meant by that.

(SEE THE SCREENSHOT OF HER REPLY)

Last year I had a baby and I’ve gained weight since becoming pregnant (nearly 3stone ) I do feel awful about myself, which I’ve told my friend several times.

I appreciate she thinks she’s taking my feelings into consideration, but I feel so hurt at her reasons for not asking me to be a bridesmaid.

All 4 girls she’s picked are super stick thin (as is my friend) maybe size 8/10’s, I’m a size 16/18 and I can’t help but feel I’d ruin the “image” if she picked me and that’s exactly why she hasn’t asked me.

She is right that I wouldn’t feel great in that dress right now, but her wedding isn’t until May next year which would’ve given me plenty of time to lose some weight!!

AIBU to think she doesn’t want me in her team bride because of how I look, she’s thinking more about having “perfect” pictures, and just using my feelings as an excuse?

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

I really hope one of the stick insects gets hugely fat. Or pregnant.

Now wait a minute... call out the bride for her actions, but calling names on bridesmaids who have nothing to do with this is bang out of order and is on par with the shitty behavior of the bride.

But she’s picked a dress over you.

I just don’t get it when people put looks over everything else. She could have asked you to do a reading or be a part in some other way or have a different dress in the same colour etc.

No, don't fuck her fiance! That would be sinking even lower than her.

Shes a massive twat and really not a friend of yours

She's a shallow, nasty cunt. Bin her and fuck her fiance

That would be going a bit far, no?

Just message that you are more than happy to wear the dress of her choice. Whatever the size dress it may be... Tell her that your i friendship overrides any low esteem feelings you may have about your post baby weight..
Make her squirm.

Best response from Aprilwasverywet

Those kind of weddings are fake and shite anyway...a complete circus.

@P999

Dear bride, that's super duper sweet of you to be so thoughtful. I think its sooooo important to get the detail right, the accessories (oops, bridesmaids) are going to look scrummy, I'm sure. I'm so glad you brought this up, because you were right. I was feeling uncomfortable about the wedding. I mean, do I really want to waste time and money going to the wedding of a self obsessed, uber cunt like you? Its opened my eyes. I'm so grateful. Kissy, kissy xxxxxxxx

@P999 The ‘kissy kissy’ sign off killed me. 😂

OP just be aware that this is exactly the kind of thread the Daily Mail like to poach and put on their website

Friday night thread perfect for the Daily Mail!

How does she know how you would feel when she never asked you?.

Get rid of this stuck up cow. You deserve better friends than the likes of her.

Sounds like you've dodged a bullet OP.

I would not reply to the text. Let her feel uncomfortable.

You now have excellent motivation to look incredible on her wedding day.

A true friend would put friends before a dream bridesmaid dress and find something flattering for you to wear. What an absolute tool she is.

She’s patronising and a budding bridezilla. If I were you I’d aim to lose the weight and turn up to her wedding in a drop-dead gorgeous frock then never speak to her again.

DF “I understand that for you wedding you want to have a certain image. I am so pleased for you”.

Then silence. Forever.

Wow. Your close friend likes you, but not as much as she likes her bridesmaid dresses. I'd be gutted. I hope you're planning a fantastic weekend away with your family instead of her look-at-me wedding.

Please don't go to her wedding

Fucking hell that’s brutal! What a bitch! I wouldn’t even go to the wedding after that text!

Sounds as if she’s making ‘Team Bride’ fit the dresses rather than vice versa. She’s looking for a fashion shoot, not a wedding, you’re worth so much more!

Wow! What a complete bitch. Drop her.

Team Bride? 🤮

Picked her dream bridesmaids dress before her poor sod of a fiancé proposed?

You are sooooo you are not caught up in her madness. I guess you could reply saying you find her attitude a touch superficial and hope she and her dream dress will be very happy together, but actually OP I’d just send a bridezilla gif and step away.

It’s a shame that the day she wants is worth hurting and alienating friends for as far as she’s concerned but if she thinks that way you really are well shot.

My bf is my MoH. Because she’s my BF. How weird do you have to be to miss out on that because your ‘dream’ is a fucking dress and not having your best friends with you?

Fucking hell what a bitch

My jaw dropped reading her text. Oh my fucking god what a bitch!!
It's like some kind of Mean Bridez film.

I wonder if you had lost the baby weight would she still want you to lose more to match the others?

Get them screenshots and tag that bitch on fb! Show her up for the nasty cow she is! Believe me most people would be mortified by what she's written to you. Then dump her arse

I know a bride that did something similar but as the weddings moved a lot with covid.. her “perfect” image will now have 2 pregnant bridesmaids