Page 17 | To not be concerned about DDs occasional drug use?

Ginger1982 · 25/05/2021 19:50

"I’d probably encourage my daughter to try psychedelics like lsd or magic mushrooms as these have no physical health issues and they changed my life (for the better!)."

Wow.

SmiledWithTheRisingSun · 25/05/2021 19:51

@Bea8809 I thought I'd be honest with mine. But then when my 3 year old asked me one day if I'd ever had a cigarette I was taken by complete surprise & said "no of course not smoking's bad for you!"

🙈

24GinDrinkingOnceTheKidsInBed · 25/05/2021 19:51

@Serpenta no, quite the opposite of a brag, I’m saying I’ve been through a period of my life where I was wreckless.. and still managed not to snort a line.

bombg · 25/05/2021 19:52

@Myothercarisalsoshit they just didn't try hard enough apparently. It's an awful attitude.

MadameTuffington · 25/05/2021 19:52

@saltyskies8

DD is 27, living in the city as a single professional and has a fantastic social life (in normal times!). We are very close and have the sort of relationship where she feels able to tell me about most things I'd say. Since moving to the city for work a couple of years ago, she's openly told me that her and her friends will occasionally use cocaine or MDMA on nights out or in and that it's very much normal amongst everyone she knows there. DD is otherwise very fit and healthy and personally, I see her drug use as entirely normal for someone of her age group who is young, single and enjoying life in the city.

DH and I got talking last night after watching a series on bbc3 about drug use and I mentioned DDs recreational drug use, which he was not previously aware of. DH is highly concerned and has accused me of being irresponsible for not being concerned about her health and advising she seeks help. I explained my view that most people in their 20s living in the city are doing this and he believes I'm completely deluded and DD has a problem.

I'm genuinely interested to know others thoughts on this? AIBU in not being worried about drug use at this stage in DDs life?

FYI I completely appreciate there are ethical issues in terms of gang crime, county lines etc. but DD and her friends are already well aware of this and I'd rather focus on the health aspect of this for the purpose of this thread :)

Well, I personally think it’s helpful for her that she shares this information with you - I am 50 and back when I was into the rave scene in 1989 I told my parents (anti drugs but alcohol loving teacher and cannabis using prison governor) about my use of Ecstasy and LSD, they weren’t happy but they always gave me sensible advice that I took onboard). I have mixed views on drugs now - DS23 was sectioned for severe cannabis psychosis (is now sober of everything even alcohol and supremely fit and healthy but has been to prison) and DD19 is a dabbler like I was but is no longer bothered and is off to Manchester Uni to read Law on September - my point is, they will do it and some will be disciplined and some will not - I do believe girls are generally more self regulating with drugs than boys.

Cocaine use is a whole different issue - an insidious and highly addictive drug that drives the wickedness of County Lines and morphs pleasant people into wankers.

You know she’s at it so you can monitor from afar - arm yourself with a bit more information about warning signs that she may be doing it too much - I’m sure she has it under control.

I still think the biggest problem in this country is alcohol - whether your tipple is wine or whatever - wake the fuck up - it may be legal but regular and/or heavy drinking is not good for you 😑

Elsiebear90 · 25/05/2021 19:52

Alcohol causes far more problems for society than illegal drugs do. It amazes me that people who confess to regularly drinking to excess get on their high horse about recreational drug use.

MinnieJackson · 25/05/2021 19:52

I went to parties where drugs were present but it never occurred to me at all to try them so its just not that people who haven't taken drugs weren't invited to good parties I've just always been a cautious person and have struggled with mental health issues, and addiction runs in my family. To me it's just not worth the risk

ThursdayWeld · 25/05/2021 19:53

OP, I haven't RTFT but I'm with you. In my twenties occasional drug use was rife, in our circles in London. We all grew out of it.

In fact I did MDMA in my late thirties. With now DH. And other friends. We're still here, in our fifties, to report on it!

rattymcratrat · 25/05/2021 19:53

I grew up in a rural area and drug use was rife from age 14/15...

I moved to a city and in my 20s took (and enjoyed) pills, MDMA, ketamine, cocaine, 2cb, 2ci, LSD, DMT, magic mushrooms, speed, nitros oxide...... I didn't (and don't) drink alcohol or smoke.

I now don't take any drugs, and have a good career and family.

My point is- that while the ethical issue of drugs is a real problem; and health can be impacted- taking drugs as a young person is not necessarily a one way ticket to destitution and addiction.

ThursdayWeld · 25/05/2021 19:54

I'd be far more worried about regular skunk usage.

Soverymuchfruit · 25/05/2021 19:54

Haven't read all replies so apologies if this has already been suggested. You and your DH might have a look together at the reports of David Nutt's new group
www.drugscience.org.uk/
He's the one who quit a govt panel because he refused to toe the govt line that all drugs are evil, and instead provides evidence based assessments.

Might reduce DH's concerns. Might also give you some useful safety advice to pass on to DD on which are particularly harmful.

Bea8809 · 25/05/2021 19:54

I know people on here are saying you shouldn’t condone it and I totally get where you’re coming from. However it’s not as simple as kicking off and telling your kids it’s wrong etc as all that will happen (especially if they’re already doing it) is they will lie and then you’ll know nothing and they probably won’t come to you if they are in trouble.

I’m not sure condoning it is right either though...it’s a very complex issue and can see both sides of the argument.

What does really wind me up though is people preaching about ‘druggies’ and all the problems and totally ignoring the impact of socially acceptable drugs like alcohol and tobacco. They’re all bad really...the only drugs I’ve done that I thought were genuinely beneficial were psychedelics.

Serpenta · 25/05/2021 19:54

[quote 24GinDrinkingOnceTheKidsInBed]@Serpenta no, quite the opposite of a brag, I’m saying I’ve been through a period of my life where I was wreckless.. and still managed not to snort a line.[/quote]
I get that. But you seem to think your situation was somehow superior despite the fact you were clearly off your nut on booze? You're wrong. The dangerous situations you must have got yourself into.

rattymcratrat · 25/05/2021 19:55

There is also the argument that if drugs were decriminalised and regulated (the Portuguese model?) they would be far, far safer.

Turkishangora · 25/05/2021 19:55

I'm assuming all those commenting on this post re how drug taking automatically leads to homelessness etc have vast experience of this happening? I does happen occasionally, but addiction is very very complex. I understand some of you have very sad personal experience but the way some posts are written it sounds like parroting the daily mail. Believe me you will have unknowingly come across people who've used drugs on numerous occasions but you just won't know it. The vast majority of people who take drugs recreationally and occasionally are absolutely fine. Some harm comes to some people, but they really are in the minority. Trust me alcohol harms are far worse in terms of being off your head/memory loss/impulsivity etc etc.

MinnieJackson · 25/05/2021 19:56

But I also agree that alcohol comes with (perhaps worse) risks and health implications. I know someone that managed to quit heroin and methadone and three years later were dead from alcoholism.

Catlady31 · 25/05/2021 19:56

Most people living in their 20's are doing Coke and mdma??

I can't tell if you're in denial or trying to be a cool mam.

I was living in the 'city' (that city being Dublin) in my 20s. I drank a lot. I smoked weed frequently but never bought (that's where the problems start). No hard drugs. Not once.

I am in my early 30's and just the mere mention of anyone smoking weed to my own mam..she acts like it's the same as injecting oneself with heroin!

I know a lot of drug takers past and present and a lot of drug addicts past present. Cocaine is highly addictive!! Someone very close to me has been a coke addict for 15 years now. They'll never stop. They'll stop when they're dead. We've tried and failed get them help, rehab, counseling etc. We just pretend like it's Normal now, when we all know they're off their face much of the time. I have had cousins addicted to heroin who started with alcohol at a young age and graduated all the way up to heroin 3/4 years later, ended up in prison. On and off the stuff for years.
I have aunts and uncles who did coke and yolks (ecstasy), in their 20's, in the 90's when it was definitely more 'normal' and they don't have addiction problems now, they've moved on and grown up.

So what you need to find out is, is she an addict or a casual user? She could absolutely stop with no problems or she could be still taken it in 10+ years time because she can't function without it!

Serpenta · 25/05/2021 19:56

'I was unconscious on the street but it's okay, mum, it was only booze not drugs'.

ThursdayWeld · 25/05/2021 19:56

HARD agree with all the PPs pointing out that alcohol is an addictive drug that does a lot of damage to people, and to society!

Turkishangora · 25/05/2021 19:56

@ThursdayWeld

I'd be far more worried about regular skunk usage.

Me too. Cannabis psychosis very sad.

bombg · 25/05/2021 19:56

How do you know they are unsavoury that is so judgmental and ignorant. She's out with her friends who are all working and making a contribution to society I bet they are all nice women with good jobs etc. you just have a stereotype and it's just not the case for most people.

Er... say what now! You're judging people for judging drug users? But it's ok because those drug users work & contribute to society so are not like other drug users who don't work? 😆

Myothercarisalsoshit · 25/05/2021 19:57

@Bea8809

I know people on here are saying you shouldn’t condone it and I totally get where you’re coming from. However it’s not as simple as kicking off and telling your kids it’s wrong etc as all that will happen (especially if they’re already doing it) is they will lie and then you’ll know nothing and they probably won’t come to you if they are in trouble.

I’m not sure condoning it is right either though...it’s a very complex issue and can see both sides of the argument.

What does really wind me up though is people preaching about ‘druggies’ and all the problems and totally ignoring the impact of socially acceptable drugs like alcohol and tobacco. They’re all bad really...the only drugs I’ve done that I thought were genuinely beneficial were psychedelics.

Yes my son liked his psychedelics too ... now he's on long term anti - psychotics. Perhaps he just didn't take them properly?

SprayedWithDettol · 25/05/2021 19:58

So any drug user on here is happy that they are supporting prostitution, slavery, gangs, criminality etc? Well, being so cool is really worth the human cost. I know what I think of you and I don’t care if you think I’m unreasonable.

I haven’t ever taken recreational drugs and never will.

Skyla2005 · 25/05/2021 19:58

@Elsiebear90

Alcohol causes far more problems for society than illegal drugs do. It amazes me that people who confess to regularly drinking to excess get on their high horse about recreational drug use.

Exactly. Far more people taken to a and e on a Friday night due to booze than drugs ! I bet all These people acting so shocked are drinking a bottle of wine a night and think nothing of it !

HemanOrSheRa · 25/05/2021 19:58

24GinDrinkingOnceTheKidsInBed
Oh, so happy to hear all your INTELLIGENT, MIDDLE CLASS, KIND, PROFESSIONAL druggie friends were FINE, after years of drug taking!
That's ok then! I guess the rest of us BORES are all wrong about about OUR teenagers being addicted and sectioned and committing suicide and dying after taking those same drugs.
I guess they weren't kind, clever or intelligent enough to be doing drugs. Silly us.

I'm so sorry . We have a young family member, who got caught up in the other side very briefly. Imagine - a good looking middle class white boy being trafficked to deal coke?! That would never happen, obviously. It happens to 'others'.