To have shouted at him?

[SlothingSunday]

DP. We don’t live together. He wants us to live together but it’s instances like this that put me off. Whenever he comes around to my house he asks me if I want him to put the eggs in the fridge as I’ve “left them out”. I’ve told him time and time again that I don’t put eggs in the fridge but because he thinks he’s right he won’t let it fucking drop. Literally everytime he comes over he will pretend to be confused about the eggs not being in the fridge. This morning he came around and I realised he’d put the eggs in the fridge. I lost it completely and shouted at him to leave my fucking eggs alone and that I’ve told him so many times that I don’t want them in the fridge and suggested he stop trying to control me. He acted all outraged at my “over reaction” but this is the tip of an iceberg. He does it with everything.

@BadEyeBri

HeckyPeck

Do read what I actually wrote, you did quote it after all.
Also, playing devil's advocate and keen to test the BP of a few over invested Mumsnetters, perhaps the partner is totally rational but OP is an egg control freak and has many, many house related rules. Who knows? Either way they don't sound suited.

I am worried about the PP who makes shit and sugar sandwiches. Hope you refrigerate those PP?

You said ending a relationship over eggs is bonkers. I was pointing out it isn't actually about eggs If you knew it wasn't about eggs, I'm not sure why you put that bit in 🤷

I'm invested in this one, because spotting the early signs of controlling behaviour can save people months or years or misery.

Maybe OP has lots of rules. It's her house so she would be free to do so. If he doesn't like them he can end the relationship. Not flat out ignore them then gaslight her about them.

He’s showing you that he considers his opinions/decisions matter more than yours, even in your own home.

You’d be a fool to live with him as it will certainly be worse.

My boyfriend puts his eggs in the fridge. He has a small fridge so this was an issue. When his fridge is getting full, he now takes them out. When he doesn't, I wouldn't dream of mentioning it. I've tidied and helped him bin a lot of stuff, but I'm always aware of boundaries and respecting that it's his house.

heckypeck

I said if it was just about eggs. My good it's Mumsnet bingo already- controlling, gaslighting, just waiting for a diagnosis of narcissism for the full house.

He thinks he knows better than uou and then is gaslighting you.

Don’t move in with this man

This is eggsactly the kind of thing you don't need to be dealing with, it sounds eggsasperating.

@Pinkrollercoaster

I had something similar with a guy I was seeing for 3 months. He put my ketchup in the fridge when I put it in the cupboard, and on another occasion insisted on putting Galaxy chocolate in the fridge when I said I wanted my bar to be left out. I finished things with him.

You ended a relationship because he didn't leave your chocolate out of the fridge?!?

@BadEyeBri

heckypeck

I said if it was just about eggs. My good it's Mumsnet bingo already- controlling, gaslighting, just waiting for a diagnosis of narcissism for the full house.

It seemed quite obvious to me that it wasn't just about eggs.

I'm not sure what else you would call repeatedly ignoring someones wishes then pretending to be confused when confronted.

Maybe you think that is normal behaviour.

Everytime he comes over I think you should cook and egg based dish...
Omelette
Quiche
Frittata
Egg salad sandwiches

Me and DH have a similar thing with tomatoes. When I lived in France, nobody put them in the fridge and they were so much tastier in salads. DH is forever putting them away when he's tidying the kitchen. For the last 6 years we've both quietly put them in/taken them out without saying anything to each other. It was annoying at first but it just makes me giggle now.

I felt like smashing the eggs in his stupid eyebrowless eyes this morning.

Porch light. He insists on it being on overnight. I don’t want it on. He pretends to be confused about this. Off he goes wobbling down the fucking stairs to turn it in as he’s “forgot” that I don’t like it on just because he’s scared of the countryside

@MilduraS

Me and DH have a similar thing with tomatoes. When I lived in France, nobody put them in the fridge and they were so much tastier in salads. DH is forever putting them away when he's tidying the kitchen. For the last 6 years we've both quietly put them in/taken them out without saying anything to each other. It was annoying at first but it just makes me giggle now.

I was just about to post about tomatoes; putting them in the fridge causes a chemical reaction that spoils the flavour. How's your partner with tomatoes, OP?

@Pinkrollercoaster That's not being 'controlling' That's being forgetful. What OP's partner does is controlling. There's a big difference.

@SlothingSunday

I felt like smashing the eggs in his stupid eyebrowless eyes this morning.

Porch light. He insists on it being on overnight. I don’t want it on. He pretends to be confused about this. Off he goes wobbling down the fucking stairs to turn it in as he’s “forgot” that I don’t like it on just because he’s scared of the countryside

You've got the 'ick'

You’ve reached contempt OP. Both of you will be happier if you end it.

He doesn’t listen to you or respect you
Don’t move in with him

Maybe you think that is normal behaviour.
WTF is "normal behaviour" when its at home?

Eggs kept in the fridge take longer to cook than room temperature ones. Tomatoes and chocolate taste better when at room temp.

@Notapheasantplucker, eggsactly

How long has this been happening?

The question was were you unreasonable to shout at him so I responded that yes, you were being unreasonable.

Of course, he was also being very unreasonable. Unfortunately it just sounds like there's no future to this relationship.

What happened to his eyebrows?

Back on topic: ditch him.

Eggbert does not approve.

I also keep my eggs in fridge (it's a hangover from living in much hotter climes) but I would be really pissed off at this.

It's boundary busting - pure and simple.

All relationships come to an end......