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AIBU?

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Original poster

Two week holiday, family room, no sex

559 replies

Timetheworldsaysicantafford · 22/05/2021 22:40

We are looking to book a special holiday for 2022 to Walt Disney World - two young children, and after researching I think the best option for us would be a family room onsite rather than a villa with separate bedrooms. Husband is grumpy because that would mean no sex for two weeks. I'm frustrated because I don't see how that should be the main factor deciding this type of holiday?! Perspective needed!!

OP posts:
JustMarriedAndLovingIt · 23/05/2021 08:39

It sounds pretty grim although not as bad as us. We went away in 2018 and due to the fact we have a blended family, DS and I were in one room and DH and his two were in another room. DH and I just snuck off every now and again for sex! Tbh, DS and I had the better deal and DSD was a nightmare the whole time screaming and shouting most nights (but that’s another story)

Anothernick · 23/05/2021 08:40

For me sex has always been an essential ingredient of a holiday. My DW is fortunately of the same mind, we sometimes reminisce about memorable shags in various holiday locations. Even when our DC were young a holiday would always involve more sex than we would have at home. Even if you are all sharing a room there are ways, though I wouldn't have shared like that for the whole two weeks of a holiday, few days maybe but two weeks would be too claustrophobic.

PreferToSitInTheShade · 23/05/2021 08:42

Constantly having to be careful about noise/light etc, having to basically be silent from 7pm/8pm?

I think this is where experiences diverge. My children stayed up later on holiday, still out and about at that time. We all basically flaked at the same time. We were hardly in the room at all. And fortunately they seemed to sleep better when we were all in the same room, there was no need for silence and darkness. It worked pretty well for us but I acknowledge we probably had easy children.

rookiemere · 23/05/2021 08:43

I'm a bit over invested in this thread, so I just did a search to see what the benefits are of staying on site. Apparently a lot of things have been scaled back with the phased reopening- extra hours and meal plans - or are getting phased out as apparently free transportation is finishing Jan 2022.

SimonJT · 23/05/2021 08:48

Two weeks sharing a bedroom with my son and husband, no thanks, a holiday should be an upgrade from everyday life, not a downgrade. Plus he is asleep early, so then I’d be trapped in the room with nothing to do until I’m ready to go to sleep. I’ve done Disney florida before, you really aren’t knackered enough to just sit/lay in a room until bedtime.

Unihorn · 23/05/2021 08:48

Also it's highly likely you'd still be out at the parks at gone 9/10pm for the fireworks and evening shows so the family are likely to go to sleep at the same.

Onsite benefits have dropped off but transport is still much better than offsite, and next year's offer includes dining credit.

HildegardNightingale · 23/05/2021 08:49

Universal Endless Summer has suites so there is a separate bedroom. Have a look into that.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 23/05/2021 08:50

Sex is great on holiday, we catch up a bit after erratic periods of having sex. We never shared with our dc on holiday.

I agree with your dh.

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 23/05/2021 08:51

What a miserable shit. Can he not concentrate on making wonderful memories for his children instead of thinking about his penis? Just for 2 weeks ff's.

Ijustreallywantacat · 23/05/2021 08:53

I never understand why so many people on Mumsnet have such contempt for men who like to be intimate with their partners. As if it's some disgusting act only selfish perverts engage in.

Yeah, your husband will survive without sex for 2 weeks if you insist. Or you'll find somewhere else to do it. But I dont see why he should be ridiculed for being down about not being able to be intimate with the woman he loves.

This!

Seperate rooms all the way for me! I shared rooms with my parents anyway and I hated it. Dad's snoring, plus I just can't get to sleep with people yapping!

PleaseGoToSleeep · 23/05/2021 08:54

I agree with your husband.
We had a family room for our "honeymoon" when kids were 1&2. Besides anything else it was shit just not being able to move around the room!

PugInTheHouse · 23/05/2021 08:56

We have often stayed in one room on holiday, its really no big deal and pretty normal for young families. I am shocked that the sex issue is such a big deal to so many people TBH.

If you're at Disney world you will be shattered so will literally just be sleeping in the room, its not like you'll be having to occupy yourself for full evenings. Of course its nice to have a suite or two rooms but back in the real world most people I know would just have a normal family room due to cost.

BananaBoatFeet · 23/05/2021 08:59

Stay off site in an apartment, somewhere like the Sheraton vitana, and don’t spend all day every day in the park.

The holiday just isn’t for your children and whereas they’ll probably be the main focus they shouldn’t be the only focus.

And surely part of a holiday is being happy and relaxed and that leading to things couples do together.

BananaBoatFeet · 23/05/2021 09:01

I never understand why so many people on Mumsnet have such contempt for men who like to be intimate with their partners. As if it's some disgusting act only selfish perverts engage in

Yeah, your husband will survive without sex for 2 weeks if you insist. Or you'll find somewhere else to do it. But I dont see why he should be ridiculed for being down about not being able to be intimate with the woman he loves

Well said.

ChardonnaysPetDragon · 23/05/2021 09:01

Don't go on a two week holiday, problem solved.

Cam2020 · 23/05/2021 09:02

He could always wank in the bathroom, seeing as he's already being such a wanker about a 2 week holiday for his kids.

BeyondMyWits · 23/05/2021 09:04

Have been to Florida 6 times now, would agree with your DH. The lack of privacy for 2 weeks would drive me nuts. Not even just sex, private conversation, the day 3 jet-lag sniping at everything.

But a Florida holiday is what you make it, there is no need to be full on , out all day every day... we did that for our first one and needed another holiday after. After that we became villa with a pool people. Relaxed and everyone got what they wanted.

Perhaps sit and have a chat about options, about what one room means to you all.

Pyewackect · 23/05/2021 09:08

I’m with your husband, I’d get very grumpy too.

MobyDicksTinyCanoe · 23/05/2021 09:09

I'd honestly go for a villa with pool. It's so much less full on and gives you the option of a quieter day or half day at the park and half at the pool. There's no way on God's earth I could spend two weeks in one room...... Also don't think he's that unreasonable wanting to have sex on holiday either. Taking kids abroad isn't much fun for adults, at least let us have something for us Grin

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 23/05/2021 09:12

We stayed in a log cabin on the wilderness resort-perfect-bedroom for kids, drop down bed in sitting area for us. Though to be fair we were so completely shattered every day it didn’t matter!

AhaShakeHeartbreak12 · 23/05/2021 09:15

I'm looking into going in 3 years, we'd have a 4 and 3 year old then. We can sneak sex in at some point I'm sure we just have to be creative and there's a bathroom there Grin

I just think it's so overpriced! I've been a few times pre kids and the price has shot right up. The only reason we were keen to stay in Disney was for the easier access to parks and the dining plan. Hopefully the dining plan will be back in 3 years when I want to go

Okbye · 23/05/2021 09:16

Having been to WDW several times I can assure you, you’ll be too knackered for sex anyway!

OnTheBenchOfDoom · 23/05/2021 09:19

Been to Disney World (and Universal) several times, shared the standard room of 2 king sized beds with the children who have been in single digits and later, in their teens.

Re the mess, you just stay organised, have a place for shoes, water bottles etc. Re the sex where there's a will, there's a way. Wink

Disney World isn't like a normal holiday if your normal holiday is a beach with some day excursions. Children are not in bed at 7pm at night because there are fireworks and shows to see, night time animal safaris and the world of Pandora from Avatar lights up beautifully at night.

Saying upgrade is easy until you look at the cost which is thousands.

There is a 5 hour time difference too, so 8pm US time in Florida is 1am UK time and it takes a few days to adjust. Plus the flight practically takes up a whole day when you include check in and getting to Disney at the other end. So tiredness takes a part plus you are walking miles upon miles every day.

Pasithea · 23/05/2021 09:20

Good job he’s not mine 11 years cos of my disability.

ZenNudist · 23/05/2021 09:26

We were going in 2020. Planning again for next year. Definitely staying in a villa. Absolutely no way I'm hell I'm staying with my dc 10 and 7 in one suite for 2 weeks.

It's his holiday too. Plus it's a lot of money hes entitled to his views being taken into account.

Dh and i could happily go 2 weeks without sex but it was a consideration that on holiday its nice to have sex a few times. It's good for couples to do it. The less you do the worse your relationship.

Currently staying with family in a flat with a studio kitchen bedroom and the dc next door in a different room and they are driving me nuts for one night only!