Is this dress OK?

[User72651]

Is this dress OK for my partner's mum to wear to my wedding (mother of the groom)? I just see a long white dress:

www.shopittome.com/sale/archived/abv6ad8eb88

No he doesn't I think he just doesn't like the dress. It's probably my fault for confiding in him that I wasn't sure about it due to the white background and have now tarnished he thoughts.

@Interestedparty132 I've changed my tune because I don't want to think about it anymore. I asked for opinions and received them and have reconsidered based on this. If I was that fixed in my mindset there would have been no point in posting. But you are of course free to believe what you want.

Have you really not got better things to occupy your time in a pandemic than the white background of a floral dress?

Seriously.

@TatianaBis

Have you really not got better things to occupy your time in a pandemic than the white background of a floral dress?

Seriously.

Have you seriously not got anything better to do then post on silly Mumsnet threads about white dresses in a pandemic?

Seriously?

Far too white in my opinion. Lots of other styles out there she could pick from.

It wouldn't be mistaken for the bridal gown and equally I don't think it will really spoil any photos but... you should be the shining star on your wedding day and I think it's in bad taste to wear anything too white to a wedding it just screams "I'm a high maintenance MIL" 😬😬

Perhaps you and your partner could stop thinking about what your mil mil is wearing and focus on having a nice day, with the people you love.

You've got a life together, your mils dress is of no significance.

Quite frankly if your partner really thinks his mother's dress is not 'classy' or 'formal' enough I'd think he was a disrespectful dick.

@User72651

It takes a second to post rubbish online, you're apparently devoting time and energy to this tosh.

[quote TatianaBis]@User72651

It takes a second to post rubbish online, you're apparently devoting time and energy to this tosh.[/quote]
As are you? I wonder why? You have a lot less invested than me but here you are.

It’s literally taken 30 seconds out of my day.

You, by contrast, are posting threads, talking to your STBDH and worrying about it.

No-one else cares.

@PastaLaVistaBBY Absolutely inspired by the mental gymnastics you must have undertaken to achieve this conclusion from the OP saying ‘not sure if this dress is the done thing for a wedding guest?’

My comment had nothing to do with the OP’s question. Surely it’s quite obviously referencing this post of yours:

... posters absolutely fall over themselves to convey just how little they cared about their weddings, how utterly unimportant the day is (since a marriage is ‘just a legal contract’), how absolutely cool they were or would be with guests turning up wearing anything from a white ballgown to a pleather mankini.

Apparently you don’t believe posters genuinely don’t care about what their wedding guests wear and if they profess not to they are lying. I found that pretty insulting given I genuinely did not care what people wore, and just wanted my friends to come along, celebrate my day and enjoy themselves. Hope that clears things up for you.

@User72651Out of interest will you be asking for comments on what your FIL will be wearing? I hope he's not planning on wearing a suit similar to your husbands. Otherwise your guests may get very confused and think he's the groom, and he'll also be impossible to spot in the photos.

@TatianaBis

It’s literally taken 30 seconds out of my day.

You, by contrast, are posting threads, talking to your STBDH and worrying about it.

No-one else cares.

I really think you need to come off this thread. You are starting to dedicate as much time as me to it!

I am grateful for your replies and have taken them on board. I have said to my partner let's just tell her we like the dress. However, he keeps looking at it and saying he doesn't think it's appropriate and he envisioned her in something more formal/classy. He wants to give her another week or two to see if she finds anything else

I... What? This is absolutely insane.

Before I clicked on the link I thought the cheeky cow is going to be wearing a pseudo-wedding dress but in fact it really doesn't look like that. I actually love the dress and hope your MILTB has the dimensions to carry it off. Was sorry it was out of stock actually - although I look nothing like the model and it no doubt wouldn't suit me!

@UnFringed

It’s lovely and not in any way upstaging the bride.

Are you going to be THAT kind of daughter in law?...

This

@lemorella

Far too white in my opinion. Lots of other styles out there she could pick from.

It wouldn't be mistaken for the bridal gown and equally I don't think it will really spoil any photos but... you should be the shining star on your wedding day and I think it's in bad taste to wear anything too white to a wedding it just screams "I'm a high maintenance MIL" 😬😬

It really doesn't scream anything at all. Your partner sounds like a snob to me, OP. I'm thankful my son just wanted me there at his wedding, and didn't give a single solitary fuck what I wore. Enjoy your day.

Another week or two to find something and then what? Will she then be disinvited?

@lighteincastlewindow

since when has it become acceptable for anyone to have a say in what a guest wears to a wedding, how precious and controlling.

When I got married I just remember being so happy and having a lovely day. Couldn't have told you what anyone else was wearing and wouldn't have cared! Although I helped my mum with her outfit, she had a cream jacket and cream and navy hat - she looked lovely.

I think she’ll be fine in that.

OP, I get what you mean. Although its patterned it's very subtle and I think in photographs it will look like a long streak of white. While no one will think she's the bride, the photos should ideally only have one white spot, your dress. I think a brighter or darker colour would be better to contrast you, if she can be persuaded without causing offence.

Perhaps you and your partner could stop thinking about what your mil mil is wearing and focus on having a nice day, with the people you love.

This

I honestly do wonder about the type of person who gets worked up about this. Really? It comes across as so egotistical and that you’re actively looking for things to get upset about.

I couldn’t tell you what any of the guests wore to my wedding. Except my own mum, because I went shopping with her.

@User72651

I am grateful for your replies and have taken them on board. I have said to my partner let's just tell her we like the dress. However, he keeps looking at it and saying he doesn't think it's appropriate and he envisioned her in something more formal/classy. He wants to give her another week or two to see if she finds anything else.

Ugh!

"appropriate" / "formal" / "classy" are not words I'd associate with a ceremony that's about love, not social climbing.

Hmm I'd be a bit worried about marrying a man who had such a strong opinion on how his mother should dress tbh.

If wearing a predominantly white dress, albeit one with patterns or flowers on it is considered a massive faux pas to weddings, why are dresses like this marketed as being suitable wedding wear?

the photos should ideally only have one white spot, your dress
Jesus, I think I've heard it all now. WTAF are you even on about?